Noise-Induced Tinnitus — Positive Success Stories

[Chris M]

@john paul
That's good. I can't wait for the day it disappears whenever that is. I have a bad headache today and for some reason it seems loud! I hope it's not reversing on me now.

 

[john paul]

@john paul
That's good. I can't wait for the day it disappears whenever that is. I have a bad headache today and for some reason it seems loud! I hope it's not reversing on me now.

Just keep going and it will improve as long as you avoid loud situations as best you can. I hope that day does come for us all here.

 

[New Guy]

Having a rough night. It's been 3 months and it's getting old. Not much I can do but give things time.

Ate lunch at a local park under a metal roofed pavilion with no walls. A kid went by on a skateboard. I thought nothing of it. Within a few minutes my t was louder. Luckily it only lasted an hour or so.

I'm so tired of worrying about every noise. So tired of being depressed and anxious at the same time. So tired of not looking to the future just focusing on the day. So tired. So exhausted. So wanting to move on.

 

[Mystery Reader]

@New Guy
I just wrote this in response to another thread, but after reading everyone's updates, I thought it might fit in over here, as well:

"This might be a bad analogy, but I look at carrying muffs in the same way someone with a severe allergy might have to carry an EpiPen. You need to have protection, just in case. I recently bought muffs (the foam earplugs were becoming difficult to work with and I haven't found a re-useable one that I like, yet) and I have them with me when I go out. Some might say it's a crutch, but guess what? Tree work was being done on the grounds of a place I went to today, and right as I pulled in someone started a chainsaw right near my car. I put the muffs on, and, once inside, didn't need them. Same thing on the way out -- the absolute second I stepped outside, the chainsaw was revved up again, right in front of me. On went the muffs. I drove away, and off they came. It was the only time I used them today. Having them there when I needed them was an absolute stress-reducer. I've put them on when I've been outside and a helicopter has flown too low overhead, and I wear them at the market because the place is ridiculously loud. Eventually, I won't need them there, but I've stopped pretending that situations won't arise when I'll need to protect. It's doing what I can to be prepared for them and reduce my own stress level that counts. (Then you just hope you get them on in time!)"

The anxiety can be the worst part of it for me on some days; it wreaks havoc with everything.

I think about you guys throughout the day and hope that all is going well.

Glad to know that your spike today wasn't long-lasting.

Mystery Reader

 

[New Guy]

Went back to the pavilion for lunch today and had a much better experience. It was a showery day so no one was there. I sat closer to the stream nearby which provided great masking. I feel like my t was a little better today, more static and less eee for a while. I ended up getting emotional while walking around the park. What can I say.

 

[emmalee]

Went back to the pavilion for lunch today and had a much better experience. It was a showery day so no one was there. I sat closer to the stream nearby which provided great masking. I feel like my t was a little better today, more static and less eee for a while. I ended up getting emotional while walking around the park. What can I say.

I am happy to hear that you had a better experience. It sounds like a nice place to have lunch. Rain showers and a nearby stream and no one else around....perfect. Getting emotional is a good thing.

 

[New Guy]

@emmalee

I've come to appreciate a good babbling stream the last few months along with a rainy day.

 

[New Guy]

Went out today and bumped into a friend. While talking I had an episode of fleeting t. My left ear rang for about 10 seconds then it went away. It was weird to say the least. I've noticed the fleeting t more often as people have pointed out on the forum happens to people with t.

Does the frequency of fleeting t increase or decrease in time or does it stay the same?

I don't know why but I've been having a rough go the last few days. I injured my back so I haven't been working for a week, perhaps that has something to do with it.

I'm stuck in this cycle of depression and anxiety and when I think of things to do that would make me happy like mow my lawn, cut wood with a chainsaw, use a weed wacker to trim my yard it seems to snowball. I would sometimes vacuum the house when I had energy to burn. No more.

I can't say my t is louder than usual, it's probably a bit more, but it's bothering me more than usual. I think because I thought it would show more progress by now.

I feel like I'm getting closer to the point I was at before the sirens a couple weeks ago. I'm moving in the right direction with my t.

Whatever happened with the sirens 2 weeks ago did set me back. It started as louder t for 4-5 days but ended up increasing my h because I protected my ears so much.

Like many newbies on the site there are so many uncertainties. So many unknowns. So many I don't knows.

I think the weight of those uncertainties and missing activities I enjoy may be weighing me down.

I've found myself getting emotional almost daily the last few days. Especially if I go for a walk in the woods where it's quiet and I now no one will see me. A walk in the woods used to be a chance to refresh but now I find myself using the quiet to work on my positive self talk which I sometimes fail at.

The other day while walking in the woods I started singing Bob Seger's Like a Rock and started crying.



The truth is it's only been 3 months and it's not as bad as it was the first month. I've been moving in the right direction, the eee has been changing to a hiss very slowly. I have fleeting t several times a week but who cares. I have h but it will go away in time. The t will either go away or my mind will learn to not notice it. My ears are going to harden again where they won't get louder when a skateboard or motorcycle goes by.

The h, the fullness, and my anxiety are the biggest problem for me. More than the noise of my t assuming I'm not in a quiet room. I've committed myself to keep up with masking so I don't have trouble with hearing my t and focusing on it. For a while I was backing off the masking because I felt the t was getting quieter.

I need to give things time and not thing so black and white. Recovering with t is not black and white but shades of gray. No matter what recovery ends up meaning.

Life has never moved so slowly for in my life. That's for sure.

I saved a post by @Ed209 in my first month of t. I saved that post because it shows the secret to t is time and that some day I'll get my life back.

I wonder if 3 months is the time when people hit a second wall with t. There's the first month which is utter depression and anxiety and now perhaps at 3 months people start to get exhausted. 3 months has never felt like such a long time but also such a short time at the same time.

I've been thinking of cutting back on my time on TT the last few days. It's been very helpful for me and I don't see not coming here but perhaps it's time to visit less often and distract myself in other ways. I don't know.

I don't want to be one of the negative people on TT but wanted to share how I'm feeling because frankly only people on this forum can really understand what I'm feeling.

I'll let this be the last negative post for a while. It's not helping anyone. Thank you all for letting me get it out and I apologize to any future readers who have been following my thread.

 

[emmalee]

Your post has me in tears, New Guy. I feel every single emotion that you are feeling at this very moment.

This is not at all a negative post, it is an honest, from the soul post.

I've been thinking of cutting back on my time on TT the last few days. It's been very helpful for me and I don't see not coming here but perhaps it's time to visit less often and distract myself in other ways. I don't know.

If time away is what you need then this is what you should do. (just don't go for too long. Myself and many others would miss you terribly.)

I am a hopeless Bob Seger fan.

 

[PortalNaut]

@New Guy
I'm near that 3 month point also, so I can relate. I didn't think your post sounded negative, but if you are feeling emotionally, lately, I would think that's a good thing. It's got to be a part of a long grieving process, and of adjustment, and...getting to wherever you/we may be in the future. How could you/I be any better by stuffing stuff down? Sounds like you are being authentic, and that is probably the actual goal for a human being. Congratulations for all the sharing and caring you have done, and putting yourself on display so we ourselves can appreciate what being a human is.

And not to be amiss, here's to hoping the T, H whatever becomes less noticeable in your life.

 

[New Guy]

@PortalNaut
Thank you for the support. Have you been noticing progress in your 3 months?

I try to be authentic and not put on a facade. I'm glad it comes across that way. I thought my thread was going to be steady progress by sheer will alone but I'm realizing this is going to be a long process. It's nice to be around people who accept us just the way we are.

 

[PortalNaut]

@PortalNaut
Thank you for the support. Have you been noticing progress in your 3 months?

Taking stock and assuming "something accomplished" is not the way I'd couch it, but in the main, to answer your question, well, I'd say so. I checked my records for you. In the month after coming off the Prednisone there were times when the days were very noisy and near month 3-4 now I have fewer of days like that. Lately while I have had had some fairly quiet T days, I have never had 7 low ones in a row. Variability through the day happens too.

Since the restaurant incident a week ago, I had two negative developments (that I haven't written about) and 2 quite high T days, followed by 2 low T days. So I don't claim to know what that portends for the future.

I was able to cope through the high days, bothered and drained a bit I admit, and then SO thankful for the quiet ones.

 

[New Guy]

@PortalNaut
Glad you're moving in the right direction. The reactivity of t is a surprise to me also. I don't know if we get too comfortable because it seems to be getting better or after a while t becomes more reactive or some combination of both. I'm going to be very careful from here on out though I know mistakes will be made.

 

[New Guy]

3 Month Update

I debated about this one because I don't feel like I'm making much progress this month. I was moving forward dealing with the physical and emotional t up until a couple weeks ago when I was in front of my house and I was next to the road when 4-5 emergency vehicles drove by with sirens on and were stuck in traffic. I plugged my ears but stayed where I was talking to someone. That set me back then, as you'll see in my history, and I think it still is effecting me today.

Physical T

For the most part I've got an eee sound in my ears as of late. It will switch to a hiss or static a few times a day or possibly be a hiss or static but just under the eee sound. The volume isn't ridiculous but I feel it's louder than before the sirens. I get crickets in my right ear once in a while but before if I got crickets they would replace the eee now if I get crickets the eee seems to still be there.

I just got back from a walk in the forest and if I stopped in the forest with no traffic around I could hear my t. It was barely above the level of the ambient sound. It wasn't annoying but there. I didn't have to listen for it there was no way to miss it but I could easily not notice it. When I was walking it was gone.

A tip for anyone with t is get out of the house. t is much less noticeable outside even if it is noticeable.

I still have fullness in my ears but it's been at least several weeks since I've had the crinkly feel . They feel like I have the start of an ear infection or something like that. The fullness comes and goes but seems to be there more often than not. This could be related to the h I talk about in the next paragraph.

h has been ramping up since the sirens as well. Noises seem louder since then. Especially traffic noise and peoples voices and airplanes and especially tractor trailers. The beeper at the grocery store seemed really loud today. Luckily I only had a few items. I've found myself listening to the tv at a lower volume as well.

At the dinner table I asked my child that sits closest to speak more quietly several times. Ridiculous.

Emotional T

I've been getting more emotional about t since the sirens as well. I've found myself crying quite a bit this past week. They say it's good to let it out so that's what I've been doing. I've been going for walks in the forest and the loneliness brings it out. It's a good, reflective loneliness but loneliness none the same.

I have no idea what this is going to end up as or where I'm going to end up. I know the veterans say it's all going to work out but it can be hard to see the light at the other end of the tunnel.

I haven't used power equipment for at least 2 1/2 months and don't imagine using any for the rest of this year. I hired a neighbor to mow my lawn and the traffic noise in front of my house annoys me 20-30k cars and trucks a day. Weekends suck with packs of loud motorcycles. One of my neighbors across the street has a hole in the muffler on his car and I plug my ears inside the house it's so loud. He revs the car to start it and then revs the car when he merges with traffic. So annoying.

I've slipped into a depression over the last week as well. I don't feel motivated to do anything or try to do anything. I'm passing time.

I pulled my back and took a month off from work to heal. Perhaps that's the issue. I have a lot of time on my hands and no sense of purpose. I was looking forward to the time to get myself centered but I don't seem to be doing very well. I have a few weeks left to work on it.

I mentioned in a previous post that I wonder if there is a 3 month wall people hit and that's what I'm feeling.

That's where I am. Hopefully I'll make a turn for the better soon.

 

[New Guy]

Walking around a parking lot to kill time today. Idiot comes out with 2 dogs, off leash, and lets them free roam. Tehy make a bee line for me and the smaller dog starts barking it's head off immediately. I was carrying ear muffs so I only heard about 5 barks but people like that annoyed me even before t along with barky small dogs. Why do people get barky small dogs?

 

[DBT]

Walking around a parking lot to kill time today. Idiot comes out with 2 dogs, off leash, and lets them free roam. Tehy make a bee line for me and the smaller dog starts barking it's head off immediately. I was carrying ear muffs so I only heard about 5 barks but people like that annoyed me even before t along with barky small dogs. Why do people get barky small dogs?

They are easier to locate if they should get lost. Just follow the annoying sound ;-)

I know that small dogs might have a bigger ego and want to act tough. But our small dog isn't allowed to do like that. We tell him to be quiet and that's it. I think every dog can learn that.

Anyway he's not barking as loud as the large dog that surprised me some time ago. He popped up from behind a fence and say HELLO!!! very loud straight to my face. My ear was ringing louder for a second or two. The next day was an unusual quiet day regarding my T.

Didn't try it again to see if that made the trick though ;-)

 

[New Guy]

@DBT

I like your sense of humor. It's weird but my t was loud last night but a little quieter today too. Maybe there's something too having a dog bark at you from 5' away. NOT!

I've never been a fan of small dogs since one of them bit me. It's hard to forget things like that.

Hope you're having a good day!

 

[Mystery Reader]

I wonder if 3 months is the time when people hit a second wall with t. There's the first month which is utter depression and anxiety and now perhaps at 3 months people start to get exhausted. 3 months has never felt like such a long time but also such a short time at the same time.

@New Guy
I think this is true. And I think the depression and anxiety can come and go in waves, leaving us hopeful on a day when things seem to be on an even keel, and emotionally vulnerable the next when they return. Your posts are so honest and true, and because of that, they are encouraging. I hope today was a better day for you.

Mystery Reader

 

[New Guy]

@Mystery Reader

Yes, today was a little quieter and less stressful. Thank goodness. I went for a 4 mile walk through the forest which always makes it a good day! Thanks for commenting my posts are encouraging. I feel like I'm letting down my peeps the last week or so.

 

[emmalee]

@Mystery Reader

Yes, today was a little quieter and less stressful. Thank goodness. I went for a 4 mile walk through the forest which always makes it a good day! Thanks for commenting my posts are encouraging. I feel like I'm letting down my peeps the last week or so.

You are not letting us down, New Guy.

Wow, a four mile walk, I'm impressed! Yay for a little less noise and a little less stress.

 

[Chad Lawton]

I mentioned in a previous post that I wonder if there is a 3 month wall people hit and that's what I'm feeling.

Not to be more of a Debby Downer but I'm currently at the 3.5 month mark and I can quite honestly say that Tinnitus is the worst thing to ever happen to me so completely understand how you feel. The anxiety I had in the first few months is gone and it has been replaced by severe depression. I don't know about you bu its tough getting out of bed in the mornings to try and make it through another day so maybe we can take solace in the fact that we are in this shitty situation together!

 

[New Guy]

I don't know about you bu its tough getting out of bed in the mornings to try and make it through another day

I thought I was through that phase but I slipped backwards and yes depression would be the word for it. I thought I was moving forward but something happened over the last couple weeks and I can't figure out what.

 

[Chad Lawton]

I've had the same thing happen. You have a few good days in a row and you start thinking to yourself that you can finally beat this thing and then WHAM, you feel like you're back at square one. I have noticed that my state of depression and the percieved volume of the ringing are strongly correlated. I'm thinking about giving the Headspace chronic pain mediation set a try to see if that helps. They say that chronic pain and tinnitus stem from the same part of the brain.

 

[DBT]

I thought I was through that phase but I slipped backwards and yes depression would be the word for it. I thought I was moving forward but something happened over the last couple weeks and I can't figure out what.

Nothing needs to have happened I think. Ive been thinking about that for a long time, and didnt come up with anything. Some days Im just down, and even way down. I tend to work my way up with little things. Just small things to look forward to. And Im saying this on a bad day, so it does work for me. My mood is affected by the T a lot, so just a bit lower T can make a huge difference in my mood.

Usually when a good period ends, I tend to go deep. Just had some fantastic days, and now its back at terrible levels. But what happened? Im getting better at accepting that Ill never know, and just hang on until better days.

So my best advice is to just make the best of it right now, and wait for the clearing. Depression is like clouds in the sky. The sun always shine, but the clouds(depression) hides it from us. No matter how long it rains, it always clears up one day. The day always comes.

 

[New Guy]

I went to a different park today and managed to make it the whole time without getting emotional. No promises next time.

A couple pictures from the journey. First a beautiful waterfall which provided excellent masking. I moved back a bit once I realized how loud it was.

Some Canadian geese and goslings. The sentries were watching me like a hawk! Are there Canadian geese in Canada? It seems like we have them all down here in the states.

My goal is to visit a park every day or two and go for a walk. Yes, I can walk around the block in my neighborhood but I'm really enjoying the parks. The less people and noise and the more green the better.

 

[emmalee]

The waterfall is beautiful! You are fortunate to have such a peaceful place to walk. We have plenty of Canadian Geese here, New Guy.

 

[Mystery Reader]

@New Guy
Just as an aside: You're a compelling writer. Have you ever written fiction/non-fiction/what-have-you, and either published or considered trying to publish?

Mystery Reader

 

[New Guy]

@Mystery Reader

I have a hard time writing because I get caught up in punctuation, grammer, etc. I have a blog which has given me practice. When I let it flow and don't think too much I do my best. Thank you for noticing.

 

[john paul]

3 Month Update



I mentioned in a previous post that I wonder if there is a 3 month wall people hit and that's what I'm feeling.

3 months is approximately when the depression really started to kick my arse. My sleeping patterns got all messed up because of it which didn't help at all and things went downhill rapidly. Depression is a bit like a spiral, or a negative feedback loop that needs to be broken before it runs away with you. Ironically i find that running is the thing which has helped me the most but iv only just recovered from a knee injury that had me out for the past 2 months.

I used to get fleeting T often but it has become rare now and i believe the fact your getting it is a good sign. I feel like i always went quieter after a dose of it and i think its a healthy part of the healing process.

As things go on the time it takes to notice improvement gets longer. Id notice improvement once a week after the first month and then it became two or 3 weeks, now its roughly a month at a time. Always when im giving up to it getting better it seems to do just that. I tend to have 2 or 3 good days, maybe a full week and then 1 or 2 bad days. But as time goes along the bad days would have been a good day months ago and each time i get a really good day its better than any day yet.

Make sure you dont let the depression win, i don't know what advice i can give you to fight it, i think its a mixed bag of everything really thats different for everyone. Its the hopelessness and tiredness your experiencing that will really wreak havoc on your mental well being, just don't let it get a grip in what ever way you can.

Stay busy and keep to a solid routine that gives you a sense of purpose so you are distracted from feeling down is probably the best advice, im sure you have heard it before...

 

[New Guy]

@john paul

Thank you for the feedback. I know things aren't as bad as they were the first month but yet the depression does seem to be setting in or I'm just getting worn down. I'm tired of having to think about every move I make and being concerned about noise. My family is getting tired of it too and I'm feeling like a burden.

My sleep patters are getting off as well. I go to bed late and wake up late. I've lost my sense of purpose.

I was going to try running a couple days a week, it feels so good to finish, but read on the forum that running can have a negative effect on h so I've been walking. Over the last week I've walked 1-2 hours a day and it's helping burn off some anxiety.

Yes, the fleeting t is pretty regular. It feels like a reminder to me that my ears aren't right. I'll have to look at it as my ears resetting.

Progress has slowed for me. I'm much more reactive to noise which wasn't as noticeable the first month or two. I feel like the trend is for the t to get quieter but you're right it's a much slower process. I think you have a point, while bad days are worse they're not as bad as a couple months ago. I have to remember that.

Going for walks has been my outlet and kept me busy but unfortunately that's the only area I'm succeeding. I'm stuck thinking, "What's the point?" which I know isn't right but it's where I am.

I think about the future and it's very uncertain to me. I have no idea what it will look like. I have no idea how I'm going to get to it. I feel like it's there but it's so blurry and out of focus. Up until this point in life if I wanted something I could go after it and get it. Now I don't want to expend the energy because I'm so focused on t and protecting myself from noise. This is probably the wrong attitude but I'm still new at this thing.

I've wondered if I should throw away this year and focus on recovering from t. Keep up with going for walks, not get stressed about the future and work on myself rather than trying to move toward some other goal. I'm not sure which direction to head.