Not sure I can make it...

Ralf

Member
Author
Jul 27, 2013
7
Canada
Tinnitus Since
07/2013
Not sure I can make it through this post let alone the hour, day or rest of my life. I developed Tinnitus 2.5 weeks ago after new loud exhaust on my bike. Modified them much quieter a couple days later but it was too late, started to wear ear plugs but didnt help, actually seemed to make it worse. The harley is up for sale and my riding days are over. During the last week, it has ramped up to insane loudness. Not sure I can make it...

I started researching the ringing, never heard of it before 10 days ago. Now that the reality of this being permanent is here. Doctors in Canada aren't much help, they just say live with it. It will be over a month to get into an ENT and the 2 tinnitus clinics wont be able to see me for months. The only thing holding me together is my wife and son. She has her own health issues and is strong but not sure she could handle me going.

Anyway, just reaching out I guess, last ditch effort as I try and keep it together. Not much of an introduction but thats the best I can do right now.
 
Hi Ralf,

The beginning of tinnitus can be difficult and it is for many people including myself. Hang in there because I promise it does
get better and better with time. The first thing you need to do is perhaps see a gp that can give you some meds that can
assist with the anxiety/ stress of the situation. Once it calms down you can then try many different approaches including diet
changes, meditation, excercise, acupuncture etc. You will find what works for you in time.

Remember one thing IT DOES BETTER.

Have a look through this forum, there are a lot of great people on here with marvellous advice.Good Luck!
 
Thanks, I am trying. Jon Wayne, you need to try as well. Think I am going to try audionotch.com and see how that is. Just need to make till tomorrow again.
 
Hi, Ralf,

Miss Lavender is right; it really does get better with time. Right now, in the beginning, I know how hard it is for you. But you've got to hang in there, for your wife and son, as well as for yourself. Please take it one day at a time, and do try some of the many suggestions from others on this forum. You'll see that, in time, things will improve.

I know it has for me, and I have both a high-pitched ringing/hissing, as well as pulsatile tinnitus (heartbeat sound in ear). Trust me, there are brighter days ahead!

Best wishes, and courage!

Karen
 
Hi Ralph ,

I am also from Canada,southern Ontario, and I understand your frustration, especially with the lack of knowledge ,and the long wait to be seen by the health care professionals.
Trust me ( I have been there) it is normal to feel, at the onset of tinnitus, total despair and worthlessness .
This feeling will Pass.
Like myself, you will receive outstanding information and advise from this forum .
This will help u to cope on a day to day basis.

Take whatever medications that will help u for now, ie anti anxiety, anti depressant or sleeping tablets,
I am endorsing what miss Lavendar is saying.

Like most people here that have had tinnitus for a longer period, saysIT WILL GET BETTER. They know, they speak from knowledge and experience.

Hoping that tomorrow will be a better day for u and your family.

Bacus
 
Just to re-iterate what the others have been saying, it will, without a doubt, get better! Plus you're only 2.5 weeks in, so there's a good chance your tinnitus might resolve itself! Even if it doesn't the process of habituation is a powerful thing!

If you have the money and time: look into intratympanic steroid injections (or ask your GP for dexsamethazone or predisone, early treatment with steroids has been said to limit damage caused by acoustic shock) or hyperbaric chamber therapy.
 
@Ralf and @Jon Wayne
Reading your post makes me want to grab you both and tell you will be ok & keep you safe...it truly gets easier, I assure you, pls don't do anything silly you don't need to become another statistic of T!

This is now my 17th day living FULL TIME with this constant bloody ringing in my head that no one else can hear & I know 100% that its so frustrating and you feel that going on is hopeless and I myself started having crazy ridiculous thoughts like you are having now but I had to slap myself and pull my shit together... I am still abled bodied, I still NEED to go to work and support my family (partner & 2 gorgeous daughters) and I still need to do EVERYTHING that I done prior to all this bullshit of T.

I was so scared at going back to work for my swing (5/5) as I fly in and out to work and stay away from all the ppl I love in some camp in the middle of Australia and I work in and around industrial massive trucks and excavators for 12.5hrs everyday, but I done it..... and I'm ok....I still have my new neighbour (dreaded T) with me the whole way but its just a noise...yeah it can make me have a meltdown while driving in my truck and I have a cry about it and ruin my make-up & yes I feel angry that I got it and not some filthy paedophile rotting in jail but unfortunately these are the cards I've been dealt with.... I have panic attacks when I cant sleep because all I can hear is this screaming in my head, I have panic attacks when my T spikes, I have panic attacks when I think how the fuck am I gonna keep going if this gets louder? but right now I'm praying (which I'm not the praying type) that there is a cure & they will find it, maybe not today or in the next year but I have to believe that this is not me, this is not permanent for the rest of my time on planet earth & that helps me ALOT.

I really hope you start feeling a little less hopeless & you start to feel a little better knowing that you have an Army of support around you suffering like yourself and willing to give encouragement and education about T and we are ALL desperately trying to find a cure for all of us living with T, this forum has been a blessing to me because there is always someone out there suffering worse than yourself and there here, still soldering on being a champion helping the rest of us..... be patient you will start focussing on it less and less as you surround yourself in the things that you love because it will naturally drowned out for a minute, 10 minutes, an hour and then you'll notice that you haven't given it much attention today and you have a little win....well that's how I found it went for me with habituating with T.

Sorry about the swearing, hope you 2 boys are having a better day
 
Ralph I am from Toronto - my profile pic is standing at Toronto Island with the city scape behind me.
That photo was taken by my now ex-gf just 2 days before tinnitus (have lost everything to tinnitus).
I can tell you not to bother worrying about getting to see an ENT if you live in Ontario - they don't prescribe any steroids for just tinnitus problems-what they will do is take an audiogram to see if you have any hearing loss, and if you do they will refer you to an audiologist for hearing aids.
There is an experimental drug called AM-101 that can be taken within 3mos of onset, but Canadians are again out of the loop. About TRT...it is not urgent as it is not a time-dependent thing and also it is not miracle cure.

Do you happen to live in the Toronto area?
 
Halo my suffer friend.Take care of the so called snake oilers There is a Whole industri waiting for new suffers they are
ful of lies.There is real resourgh going on find it on t.talk.We are all waiting to get fre of that monster.Live day for day
and relax,nights can be terrible.And i wonna leave the planet,but dont mine is also loud and i sleap bad.But one day.
My English is not so good.You got a bunch of new friends here.
 
Well this morning it is a little better. I have had a really high pitch around 8khz the last few days on top of the other one that was really tough, today it has gone back to a 6khz pitch that is more tolerable. I started taking Clear Tinnitus capsules yesterday and also stopped taking a strong decongestant, Eltor which I found out last night does have a side effect of tinnitus. My pharmacist said it wasn't. I am also wondering if my computer has any impact on my T as I work 8-10 hours a day on it. I got a set of Bose noise cancelling headphones and am going to start on audionotch.com and see if that helps. Monday will call a local HBOT and see if they can get me in.

Thanks @Jade , @Miss lavender , @Bacus @Karen @yonkapin @jes @dan and everyone for your support, I really need it.

@dan, I live in BC.
 
Just to add to what everyone has said, it will get better. It's almost impossible at first, but try not to listen for it deliberately. that's the first step on the road. All the best.
 
Hey Ralf, I have been meaning to write. I am glad you are having a better day. I find my T pitch (about 8 hz) goes up and down, as does the perceived loudness. BTW, how are you measuring your pitch on your own?

I did want to mention: Tinnitus is as much, If not more, of a disorder of the brain as the ears. That's why an anxiety/panic response can come with it as it did for me. Your brain, which is generating noise to make up for the signals it's not getting from your damaged inner ear hairs, is perceiving this all as a threat and activating the primal centers of your brain to protect your body in time f crisis. You can't just talk yourself out of these feelings or ignore them. And anxiety will aggravate the T. So if the anxiety continues -- and you sounded pretty anxious when you first wrote -- get help from a good menal health professional. Don't be afraid to temporarily use meds, under professional supervision, if you must. Also, guided meditations on tape and regular exercise are huge helps.

I now have a two-pronged approach to working on getting better: treating my auditory system AND treating my brain. I am three months into this and boy, some days are grim. But other days are better. Let's all help each other have less bad days and more good ones. Know we all care about you.
 
I am trying both audionotch and an app called Tinnitus measurer. I am having a pretty hard time finding the pitch. My T is not that loud now and almost seems to mimic the sound I am putting in. I am anywhere from 4-8Khz. That brings me to another point, the way that it came on seemed like it was when I was wearing my ear plugs and my harley seemed to drone at cruising speed and it felt like that sound vibration was echoing in my head. it wasnt that loud of an exhaust and my earplugs are rated for 31db. it seemed like it was a brain response that was continuing that drone while and after I stopped riding. I get a phantom vibration on my right thigh where I keep my cell phone in my right pocket. numerous time throughout the day I feel my phone vibrate and reach to my pocket only to realize that there is no phone there. I havent really heard of anyone having T from a memory response or getting locked into vibration pattern but fingers crossed that the hairs are just not turning off and still sending in that frequency.
 
... living FULL TIME with this constant bloody ringing in my head that no one else can hear & I know 100% that its so frustrating and you feel that going on is hopeless and I myself started having crazy ridiculous thoughts like you are having now but I had to slap myself and pull my shit together...

...I still have my new neighbour (dreaded T) with me the whole way but its just a noise...yeah it can make me have a meltdown while driving in my truck and I have a cry about it and ruin my make-up & yes I feel angry that I got it and not some filthy paedophile rotting in jail but unfortunately these are the cards I've been dealt with.... I have panic attacks when I cant sleep because all I can hear is this screaming in my head, I have panic attacks when my T spikes, I have panic attacks when I think how the fuck am I gonna keep going if this gets louder?

Brilliant... I shouldn't think I'm the only one who can empathise with everything you have said Jade - thanks for putting it out there :cool:

Click
 
@click LOL Thank you :giggle:

@Ralf I wear earplugs for my job (driving machinery in the mines) and when I put them in my T is 10x as loud and it also takes on a different tone instead on a flat high pitched eeeeeeeek its a soccer field of crickets...crazy huh
 
Well just had my first HBOT session for 90 minutes. All things considered, an ok experience. There is one located only a km away so very convienent. Will be going 3 more times this week and then 4 times next week. Cost is only $125/hr. End of next week have a trip to Hawaii that I couldnt cancell so will be continuing my treatment there but is more expensive, $195/hr. Will be dropping a bunch of money by the end of it so really hope this will make a difference. Thanks again for the support everyone.
 
@Jade are you working on the gas lines? I was in Chinchilla a couple years back shooting a promotional video for a Canadian company in the gas industry that was doing business there. Pretty remote stuff but hear the workers were making good cash. Did some shooting around Brisbane and Burliegh heads too. Stayed a little while longer to visit with friends and surf then hit Fiji for a couple more weeks.
 
@Ralf,

Hey that's very cool! I know Chinchilla but no I work in the Bowen Basin in Coal, Its even more remote then Chinchilla cab you believe it lol, My home is just an hour north of Brissy in the mountains, the Sunshine Coast hinterland so beautiful, sounds like you do a lot of traveling with your job too like myself
 

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