Oldies sometimes make us newbies feel worse!

[Zimichael]

P.S. Carol..... You have stirred up a bit of "debate" here and I want to remind you of one thing that cuts two ways.

Please do not feel intimidated, or overly cautious, or afraid, or hesitant, to post what you feel and experience in relation to your T, or yourself, or how you are coping it, or not coping with it...in the future.

Not everything we may post or feel is going to be agreed with or liked or needs excusing. It is what it is, and if not done in a cruel or abusive manner (which I have never seen a hint of from you)... just "go for it"!!! OK?!

I think your initial OP was 100% valid, makes sense and is a totally "feelable"...so it's up for discussion. That's what places like this are for. It deepens understanding. Expands the spectrum. Part of the T universe we cope with or have to deal with. Alone and together.

Keep sharing honestly...that is one of the greatest gifts we can give each other IMHO.

Hugs... Zimichael

 

[Stina]

I don't know what i'm about to read until i start reading it ... as for so called OLDIES that is what they call themselves !!!

You can judge the content by the title. Normally they are quite easy to detect. In the beginning I opened them and it just drove me mad. Its the same with news- why would I read smth titled "A mother is imprisoned because of killing her child"? It is only going to make me feel bad and is not going to give me any new information. In the sake of my own mental health I just ignore things like that, spend less time online and enjoy the moment.

 

[pef]

Pef, i'm sorry that you have been offended by my OP, i did not suggest at any time oldies should not post !!! i am often told that if you give yourself time, things will get better and better !! SO my point is this .... time does not make things better as people who have been suffering for 10, 20 ,30 years are still suffering, so WHY???? are we told to give time time ...when quite clearly time has not made things better for THE OLDIES !!! and yes i am alarmed when i read these stories as my thoughts turn towards my own future and how bleak it is likely to be, as reading about some ones miserable life since getting T has been a struggle, full of depression, no social life, isolation as no one gives a damn, must i go on !! of course they need support and of course they should seek it !!!! all i'm pointing out is that one minute us newbies are given hope and reassurance in one post, and then the next minute all that hope is taken away by reading the next post, i hope i have explained myself to you.

I was not offended, no worries. We all deal with T differently. On the flipside, someone that habituated relatively quickly after an initial period of depression and fear - like me - may be discouraging for the newbie that has had it for several months. It's best not to worry about how fast or slow someone handles T. Just concentrate of what you can do to get better (which is another topic that is unique to each person).

 

[clare hart]

Let me point out to you that when you go to reviews of a doctor, business, etc., you will find that the most negative are often the ones who take the time to post their complaints. At least that has been my experience. So you may be reading some of that. But I think Stina is right too. We have times when the T gets the better of us and we go through the pain again. I speak partly from my own experience, but I am not an oldie as such, so don't take my word.

If you have yet to look into the treatment section and success stories, you may find something that will work for you there. I think few find anything that works right away, but there are ways to make it easier to live with. I hope you find these.