MemberHello all! I've been a lurker on here for the last two months and very much appreciate all of the wonderful information many people bring to the table on this oh so lovely condition. Wanted to share my story and gather any input anyone may have. Sorry for the long-winded story beforehand!
I first remember hearing a lower-pitched pulsing sound in my head starting back in 2008 after I had my very first bout of anxiety/panic attacks. I would only ever hear it in a silent room or at night and short of the first couple of weeks, it never bothered me much. It would come and go throughout the years and I never gave it much thought.
Beginning January 1st of this year started the most stressful period I have ever experienced in my life. I was five months into the loss of a long term relationship, start of a brand new job, and move into a new apartment in lower Manhattan, having to leave the one I loved and shared with my ex. I admittedly had been drinking more than I should have been as I don't have a great tolerance for alcohol, however it was always drinks out with friends and never spent time drinking alone. Drinking would induce panic attacks the next day and it would take me two or three nights to be able to fall asleep again. Let's call what I'd experience a mini-withdrawals. All through the month of December I was ill with tonsillitis, and then the flu which led to a good deal of isolation. That said, by New Years Eve I was feeling better and went out, had a long night, and this time around the post-drinking anxiety did not end but rather turned into a full on emotional breakdown. I reached out for help and self-admitted for three nights into a mental care facility at a local hospital. The doctors prescribed (within all of 5 minutes) 15mg Mirtazapine and Buspar. I only took the medications for four days with the last day being January 15th, ceasing the medication with my GP's approval.
I decided to leave New York City and spend time with my parents in Central Virginia in order to allow my mental health to recover (I had been through two similar breakdowns in the past due to alcohol consumption and my parents became a safe place for me during those previous times, however back then they still lived in my childhood home out on Long Island, NY and it was much easier to commute into Manhattan for work.) From January 1st until March 26th, I was experiencing a pretty much constant state of anxiety and restlessness along with significant insomnia. My employer agreed to put me on short-term disability, however in early March I had to make the very difficult decision to resign from my seven year career in finance as I realized it was not working out for me mentally. Also in early March, my grandfather passed away after a long battle with Alzheimer's at the age of 91. From March 12th to March 16th I attended services with my parents in upstate NY.
Cue social distancing and stay at home orders for the COVID-19 pandemic.
Around March 20th, I woke up with a high-pitched (16,000hz or so) ringing in my right ear. Over the next few days that tone would seem to fluctuate like an electric signal in my head, moving back and forth from left to right and then centralize to feel like it was coming from "behind" my ears. I had a minor feeling of fullness in my ears, however did not and have not experienced any perceived sensitivity to sounds. During this time I did not have any exposure to loud sounds. I have not listened to loud music since New Years, no concerts since December of 2018, and there aren't any events other than using a small electric leaf blower for less than 15 minutes sometime in March, and a vacuum every couple of weeks, that I can attribute noise exposure to. I have used earbuds over the years and spent many hours on the NYC subway and platforms (which can be quite loud,) but again, nothing since January 1st. I also haven't taken any medications since December 2019, including Advil, aspirin, or Tylenol. Only vitamins.
My GP performed a physical on February 24th and told me that I had a little bit of fluid in my left ear, but it was nothing to be concerned over. When I visited her again in April due to the tinnitus, she said both of my ears were clear - no fluid or any wax. I also had an ENT/audiologist visit on May 7th and my ears were "perfectly clean" as the doctor said. My hearing results revealed normal hearing sensitivity, bilaterally with the exception of a mild sensorineural notch at 3kHZ in both ears. Word recognition test was perfect. The ENT's words were "with your age of 31 years and very good physical health, I'd expect that in time this will go away."
Since the onset two months ago, the fluctuation of the sound has decreased. And now I would say that the high pitched tone is more of an electrical buzzing sound that I can still hear over pretty much everything except a shower. It seems to spike up and down at random, however as time goes on, each high spike leads to perceived quieter days for longer times, little by little. Two nights ago for the first time I heard relative silence for a few minutes. Yesterday it spiked and appeared louder than it had been since the beginning, and this morning I had an hour or so that seemed to be the quietest it's been since it started. While I do still hear/feel the buzz, it has been an overall good day in terms of volume. I am wondering if this pattern is a good sign?
I am still living at my parent's new home in Virginia due to COVID which has put a serious pause on my life. The constant anxiety stopped all of a sudden on March 26th, however I was left with moderate depression due to all of the sudden life changes. The depression has been getting better and better as each day goes on, and I can finally say that aside from the tinnitus, I feel like I'm very close to being back to a normal state of mental strength. While I still have a little bit of difficulty sleeping at times, overall the insomnia has improved drastically as well. I desperately miss NYC, all of my friends, and full-time employment, however I realize that until Corornavirus settles down in the NY metro area, I will need to spend some more time here with my parents (stressful in itself at times, especially with not much to do.) All of this has compounded on some already serious stress, however as time goes on my emotions have been stabilizing substantially from where I was even in mid-April.
I have not had a drop of alcohol since New Years Day and after all of these years of struggling with alcohol induced anxiety, I've decided to stop for good. I have also decided to never use EarPods again and wear hearing protection in loud environments, even if there's a possibility mine is not from acoustic trauma.
Considering everything above, what are the chances that the tinnitus will fade in time?
Thank you all!
I first remember hearing a lower-pitched pulsing sound in my head starting back in 2008 after I had my very first bout of anxiety/panic attacks. I would only ever hear it in a silent room or at night and short of the first couple of weeks, it never bothered me much. It would come and go throughout the years and I never gave it much thought.
Beginning January 1st of this year started the most stressful period I have ever experienced in my life. I was five months into the loss of a long term relationship, start of a brand new job, and move into a new apartment in lower Manhattan, having to leave the one I loved and shared with my ex. I admittedly had been drinking more than I should have been as I don't have a great tolerance for alcohol, however it was always drinks out with friends and never spent time drinking alone. Drinking would induce panic attacks the next day and it would take me two or three nights to be able to fall asleep again. Let's call what I'd experience a mini-withdrawals. All through the month of December I was ill with tonsillitis, and then the flu which led to a good deal of isolation. That said, by New Years Eve I was feeling better and went out, had a long night, and this time around the post-drinking anxiety did not end but rather turned into a full on emotional breakdown. I reached out for help and self-admitted for three nights into a mental care facility at a local hospital. The doctors prescribed (within all of 5 minutes) 15mg Mirtazapine and Buspar. I only took the medications for four days with the last day being January 15th, ceasing the medication with my GP's approval.
I decided to leave New York City and spend time with my parents in Central Virginia in order to allow my mental health to recover (I had been through two similar breakdowns in the past due to alcohol consumption and my parents became a safe place for me during those previous times, however back then they still lived in my childhood home out on Long Island, NY and it was much easier to commute into Manhattan for work.) From January 1st until March 26th, I was experiencing a pretty much constant state of anxiety and restlessness along with significant insomnia. My employer agreed to put me on short-term disability, however in early March I had to make the very difficult decision to resign from my seven year career in finance as I realized it was not working out for me mentally. Also in early March, my grandfather passed away after a long battle with Alzheimer's at the age of 91. From March 12th to March 16th I attended services with my parents in upstate NY.
Cue social distancing and stay at home orders for the COVID-19 pandemic.
Around March 20th, I woke up with a high-pitched (16,000hz or so) ringing in my right ear. Over the next few days that tone would seem to fluctuate like an electric signal in my head, moving back and forth from left to right and then centralize to feel like it was coming from "behind" my ears. I had a minor feeling of fullness in my ears, however did not and have not experienced any perceived sensitivity to sounds. During this time I did not have any exposure to loud sounds. I have not listened to loud music since New Years, no concerts since December of 2018, and there aren't any events other than using a small electric leaf blower for less than 15 minutes sometime in March, and a vacuum every couple of weeks, that I can attribute noise exposure to. I have used earbuds over the years and spent many hours on the NYC subway and platforms (which can be quite loud,) but again, nothing since January 1st. I also haven't taken any medications since December 2019, including Advil, aspirin, or Tylenol. Only vitamins.
My GP performed a physical on February 24th and told me that I had a little bit of fluid in my left ear, but it was nothing to be concerned over. When I visited her again in April due to the tinnitus, she said both of my ears were clear - no fluid or any wax. I also had an ENT/audiologist visit on May 7th and my ears were "perfectly clean" as the doctor said. My hearing results revealed normal hearing sensitivity, bilaterally with the exception of a mild sensorineural notch at 3kHZ in both ears. Word recognition test was perfect. The ENT's words were "with your age of 31 years and very good physical health, I'd expect that in time this will go away."
Since the onset two months ago, the fluctuation of the sound has decreased. And now I would say that the high pitched tone is more of an electrical buzzing sound that I can still hear over pretty much everything except a shower. It seems to spike up and down at random, however as time goes on, each high spike leads to perceived quieter days for longer times, little by little. Two nights ago for the first time I heard relative silence for a few minutes. Yesterday it spiked and appeared louder than it had been since the beginning, and this morning I had an hour or so that seemed to be the quietest it's been since it started. While I do still hear/feel the buzz, it has been an overall good day in terms of volume. I am wondering if this pattern is a good sign?
I am still living at my parent's new home in Virginia due to COVID which has put a serious pause on my life. The constant anxiety stopped all of a sudden on March 26th, however I was left with moderate depression due to all of the sudden life changes. The depression has been getting better and better as each day goes on, and I can finally say that aside from the tinnitus, I feel like I'm very close to being back to a normal state of mental strength. While I still have a little bit of difficulty sleeping at times, overall the insomnia has improved drastically as well. I desperately miss NYC, all of my friends, and full-time employment, however I realize that until Corornavirus settles down in the NY metro area, I will need to spend some more time here with my parents (stressful in itself at times, especially with not much to do.) All of this has compounded on some already serious stress, however as time goes on my emotions have been stabilizing substantially from where I was even in mid-April.
I have not had a drop of alcohol since New Years Day and after all of these years of struggling with alcohol induced anxiety, I've decided to stop for good. I have also decided to never use EarPods again and wear hearing protection in loud environments, even if there's a possibility mine is not from acoustic trauma.
Considering everything above, what are the chances that the tinnitus will fade in time?
Thank you all!
