Not sure I'll make it that long. Laser therapy and more noise exposures made me competely homebound. ENTs prescribed Valium and antidepressant, which I tried not to take at all, but the few times I did, they made me worse.
I've tried PRP injections to AA joint and all around neck and TMJ area, corticosteroids to occipital nerve, acupuncture at a pain clinic (I said no Lidocaine but I think they gave me Lidocaine and not the steroids I asked for), supplements...
I got pushed towards drugs which made everything worse. I let them talk me into benzo use for sleep and now I'm at a deathly ringing level.
If our system gets over-loaded with tons of different variables, it is possible to get the opposite effect that we may seek. I read your words and fully understand your feelings. You are almost at your 1 year mark with tinnitus, I had a rough year as well (when I first got tinnitus close to 35 years ago) and what really helped me was talking to my audiologist and just talking it out with people that would listen to my concerns.
The issue for some with tinnitus, is that it can become an obsession. Whether we can barely hear it (we could be zoned in and focus on that sound) or it is impossible to not hear it (I am beyond hell level).
The reason we scan, listen or possibly obsess over it, is because our minds are not busy. Our minds could be sitting idle and not much activities are going on. This can possibly make people just focus on their ringing more. Focusing in on odd sounds and weird noises can possibly affect our moods. It used to do it to me as well, I have been through my major ups and downs with the ringing like all you good people have.
My stress, emotions and dislike for these tones and sounds used to get me upset as well. But, after years, decades of living with this thing, it made me understand that, "Tinnitus feeds off stress."
That feeding can bring on some horrible spikes. I am already at beyond hell level, each day is a challenge.
The ringing is beyond disruptive and maddening. As loud as this "HELL" is, my mind is stronger than the tinnitus. My inner drive is stronger than the tinnitus.
I wake up, with beyond severe ringing each day, it's like a spike 24/7. It's not at all exciting to start the day with such horrible, extreme ringing. BUT it's a reality I face and some of you good folks face.
My early dealings with tinnitus (barely heard, only in a very quiet room) set the stage for my life and how I deal with an aggressive, multiple tone tinnitus these days.
Stay strong my friend. We are rooting for you and those that need lots of love and support.
Know this: Each day, each "small" win is huge for us. We just have to go after those "small" wins.
Each day, I try to just keep moving forward...