Re-Entering the Workforce

[cviechec]

I've had pretty awful tinnitus for about 7 months now, and a lot of that time period was over the summer // the last semester of college. Predictably so, the tinnitus affected my concentration in class and lowered my grades. I had a 4.0 GPA before tinnitus and after I was getting quite a lot of B's in classes (not the end of the world, but the difference still upsets me). On top of the tinnitus, about 3-4 months ago I developed dozens of floaters in both eyes, as well as a worsening of my pre-existing visual snow.

Now that my backstory is out there, I just want to know how people manage re-entering the workforce with such a distracting and debilitating condition? I started training on my new position today and was getting mad at myself for my inability to fully concentrate on the presentation, much like in lecture at college.

Sadly, i'm pretty sure the only advice people will be able to give is to take it a day at a time, which is what I'm going to do, but it really fucking sucks. I can't just put off entering the workforce forever, I have bills to pay and people to take care of.

 

[Karen]

I can relate to your situation, @cviechec . Before my tinnitus got worse (it was mild before taking a blood pressure drug), I was working full-time, and often worked overtime. Afterward, I went through a period where I took a leave of absence due to the loud tinnitus, anxiety, and adrenal fatigue that it caused.

When I re-entered the workforce, it was hard right at first, but as time went on and I got feeling better and more acclimated to the tinnitus, I actually found work to be a welcome distraction. It takes your mind off the tinnitus when you are busy, and for me, it helped to have a fan running under my desk. Distraction really seems to work for me, and it might be the same for you. Other people say they wear a headset and play music during the day, and that could help, too. It depends on what your job is.

I wish you success in re-entering the workforce, and hope it proves to actually be therapeutic for you, as it has for me!

Best wishes,
Karen

 

[Zug]

Yeah, it fucking sucks. I never liked those "feel good stories". Tinnitus sucks. I've written a success story, am in a much better place today than I was when my Tinnitus started, and I still would rather not have it.

I'll tell you what worked for me: First, I figured my life was fucked. So, I couldn't make things worse. I got back to doing stuff and even if I hated my job, well, I was still in the "everything is shit" phase, so I decided I would just keep working.

In time it gets easier. Really. Even in a loud day (when for some reason my Tinnitus is more noticeable), I can still get shit done. At the start you will hate everything, but it will get easier.

One thing that helped me was to get some noice cancelling headphones. I don't know where you work, but sometimes just putting them on and playing some music (and in the beginning the sound of water) helps to distract from sounds.

One thing that is very hard to deal is this feeling of being dumber. I know what you mean, I feel your pain. One funny thing is that a lot of people who have Tinnitus don't talk about it. I later discovered that some very successful people in my circle of friends have it. So yeah, I know you don't want to hear it, but give it some time and don't give up.

Best,
Zug

 

[cviechec]

Thanks Karen for your post. I realize things should inevitably get better with time, the problem for me is I don't know how much time it will take or how long I can tolerate it..many have done it, many will continue to do it, but others have also failed. My first day today was really an eye opener for me in a negative sense.

@Zug what you said really resonated with me. I definitely feel "dumber" and definitely feel "lazier" post tinnitus. It's awful because I use it as a scapegoat when I really shouldn't, but at the same time it's a valid scapegoat. One side of my mind is miserable from T/Floaters, and I know I just have to power through. But that little voice in the back of my head that I've always had saying "you can't do it" is way louder and more prevalent now that I have these conditions.

 

[Zug]

Thanks Karen for your post. I realize things should inevitably get better with time, the problem for me is I don't know how much time it will take or how long I can tolerate it..many have done it, many will continue to do it, but others have also failed. My first day today was really an eye opener for me in a negative sense.

@Zug what you said really resonated with me. I definitely feel "dumber" and definitely feel "lazier" post tinnitus. It's awful because I use it as a scapegoat when I really shouldn't, but at the same time it's a valid scapegoat. One side of my mind is miserable from T/Floaters, and I know I just have to power through. But that little voice in the back of my head that I've always had saying "you can't do it" is way louder and more prevalent now that I have these conditions.

Well, I'll tell you a secret: there's a difference between how the world sees you and how we see ourselves. I've received praises for my work on days I was feeling completely shitty, and felt like I messed up on days I felt good. Funny.

Anyway, hang in there. You can do it.

 

[linearb]

I set my life up to have absolute control over my work space, but I'm a control freak from a family of proud control freaks

 

[Alue]

I never left it. I didn't have a choice in the matter as I have bills to pay.

It really does affect my concentration, sleep, and ability to work around noisy equipment.

 

[Jazzer]

Hi @cviechec - when my T ramped up it was terrible.
Noise in the head is Effing unbearable, unacceptable.....and I honestly thought it was unliveable.
But even though it is totally unacceptable, the real trick is, that you accept it.
When I wake every morning, the first thing that hits me is 'Noise.'

The very first thing I say to myself is:

"Easy Dave - hiss is normal,
hiss is perfectly normal."

I preempt the crushing disappointment, and take the sting out of it....then I get on with my day.
It is a good common sense approach and is a statement of fact.
We know that with T we have 'hiss - cicadas - noises'..etc...
For the time being we can not avoid it.
The first step in accepting it is expecting it.
Your T may well get better, so don't despair.
This little trick may help you get past it., and move on with your day.
I don't know if it will help you, but it does help me.
I have quite long periods when I am unaware of T.
Make that statement as soon as you wake.
(Repeat it throughout the day, as necessary.)
"Perfectly normal."

Very best wishes,
Jazzer x

 

[Rajin]

I know it sucks , used to do my job with ease. Now I feel the days are longer and the year will never end. No one deserves to live with a noise in the head 24/7 . This is so sad , we just have to live with it is not acceptable. It is a very difficult thing. They need to find a treatment for T . At least to ease the noise. I got injured at my job and still working. You just have to be strong for your family.

 

[Jazzer]

I know it sucks , used to do my job with ease. Now I feel the days are longer and the year will never end. No one deserves to live with a noise in the head 24/7 . This is so sad , we just have to live with it is not acceptable. It is a very difficult thing. They need to find a treatment for T . At least to ease the noise. I got injured at my job and still working. You just have to be strong for your family.

@"Rajin
"You have to be strong for your family,"
Absolutely - they love you and need you xx

 

[Andrei90]

I've had pretty awful tinnitus for about 7 months now, and a lot of that time period was over the summer // the last semester of college. Predictably so, the tinnitus affected my concentration in class and lowered my grades. I had a 4.0 GPA before tinnitus and after I was getting quite a lot of B's in classes (not the end of the world, but the difference still upsets me). On top of the tinnitus, about 3-4 months ago I developed dozens of floaters in both eyes, as well as a worsening of my pre-existing visual snow.

Now that my backstory is out there, I just want to know how people manage re-entering the workforce with such a distracting and debilitating condition? I started training on my new position today and was getting mad at myself for my inability to fully concentrate on the presentation, much like in lecture at college.

Sadly, i'm pretty sure the only advice people will be able to give is to take it a day at a time, which is what I'm going to do, but it really fucking sucks. I can't just put off entering the workforce forever, I have bills to pay and people to take care of.

May I ask how your symptoms progressed over time? What did you start with and what came after? I'm asking because I suffer from the same symptoms in my eyes. I had floaters 4 years ago and they have gotten worse over time. Starting late 2016, I developed blurry vision at the top and bottom of both eyes. I also started getting glare and the starburst effect when looking at light. My night vision has worsened and I also got a mild version of palinopsia which lasts a few seconds (if it's even considered that). It happens with lighted objects. Basically, these are all associated symptoms with visual snow but I don't have it yet. At least, I don't think I do. At night or with dim light, I believe I observe really fine static or something close to it. It's like the image is not still and a heat wave distorts it.

Then I got really bad tinnitus which is most likely noise induced. It looks like both issues do seem to be related to each other because many experience them together. My history with listening to loud music began just about 4 years ago. If I find out the damage is related, I'm going to go nuts!