So Sad and Hopeless : Update

[Bam]

I would love to see some glimpses of the old me. Talking on the phone with a friend recently gave me a tiny glimpse. He offered a witticism and I burst out laughing. Felt so good.

I had a belly laugh tonight too. I was sitting twenty yards from the sea and playing sea sounds on my iPhone because the real sea wasn't loud enough. I had to amplify the bloody sea! I suddenly realised the dark absurdity of this life and I just cracked up.

 

[New Guy]

@TracyJS

The nice thing about having one thread for your thoughts is you get to decide what is posted here. If people don't want to see it they'll look away or block you and that's better for everyone.

Keep fighting Tracy. Be proud that you're seeking others to be around and seeking Doctors. Your a fighter and you're going to make it, even if by sheer will. Say hi to Riley for me.

 

[Jcb]

No apology necessary...You are never rambling.
Thank you for your suggestions and for letting me know I'm welcome to PM you as well

Just wanted you know the offers there. If you do take up the witchism, let me know how it goes....that made me laugh

 

[TracyJS]

@TracyJS

The nice thing about having one thread for your thoughts is you get to decide what is posted here. If people don't want to see it they'll look away or block you and that's better for everyone.

Keep fighting Tracy. Be proud that you're seeking others to be around and seeking Doctors. Your a fighter and you're going to make it, even if by sheer will. Say hi to Riley for me.

Thank you @New Guy! Will do, with Riley

 

[Starthrower]

Hi @TracyJS! I have been thinking of you. I know what you are going through searching for a doctor and feeling rejected. I was there. But I never did acupuncture. That did not sound like much fun. The good thing though you tried something. A lot of this is trial and error.

Just had to say a quick hello. Unfortunately we had a water pipe burst in our bedroom (from the adjoining master bathroom shower) and everything is soaked - carpet and walls - so I have been dealing with this for a few days now. Sigh...new copper plumbing is next week.

Not so good stress and tinnitus....kinda sucks.

 

[Nanny chocolate]

When you said you were in the South West? I think! I automatically thought of Coast. I'm in lovely Torbay.
Eve
@Jcb

 

[Jazzer]

I would love to see some glimpses of the old me. Talking on the phone with a friend recently gave me a tiny glimpse. He offered a witticism and I burst out laughing. Felt so good.

"WOW - Tracy - a great post xxx"

Love

Dave
xxx

 

[Jazzer]

Given that something truly horrible has happened to each one of us, which I do not need to dwell on, I am absolutely positive that the best, the only real way forward, is to live this life the very best way we can.

Move forward,
Enjoy company,
Have 'Fun!'

Yes - it takes courage,
But We've All Got That!

Dave
xxx

 

[glynis]

@TracyJS ,
Lovely to hear you have been laughing and it's a great tonic ..
Hope you get to laugh today and you have a lovely day because you deserve it everyday.
We are all here for you.
love glynis x

 

[Jcb]

When you said you were in the South West? I think! I automatically thought of Coast. I'm in lovely Torbay.
Eve
@Jcb

Love Torbay, it's feels like you're abroad when the weather is nice, and such a lovely coast.

 

[Jcb]

@TracyJS morning or afternoon or evening haha hope you're feeling a bit better and managed to get out and get w bit of fresh air.

 

[TracyJS]

@Jcb
It's morning where I am. I have been awake since 3am. Sleep is difficult. Lots of anxiety. I hope your day is better.

 

[TracyJS]

@TracyJS ,
Lovely to hear you have been laughing and it's a great tonic ..
Hope you get to laugh today and you have a lovely day because you deserve it everyday.
We are all here for you.
love glynis x

Thank you, Glynis.

 

[TracyJS]

Hi @TracyJS! I have been thinking of you. I know what you are going through searching for a doctor and feeling rejected. I was there. But I never did acupuncture. That did not sound like much fun. The good thing though you tried something. A lot of this is trial and error.

Just had to say a quick hello. Unfortunately we had a water pipe burst in our bedroom (from the adjoining master bathroom shower) and everything is soaked - carpet and walls - so I have been dealing with this for a few days now. Sigh...new copper plumbing is next week.

Not so good stress and tinnitus....kinda sucks.

@Starthrower
Thanks for the hello.
Yes, it's so hard searching for help and not finding it. I really worry about not making it without some help soon. I am trying so very hard to cope. It may not seem like it, perhaps, but I am. I'm holding on by a thread at times.

I am so sorry about the water pipe burst. So very stressful. And yes, really sucks. I hope things are drying out and your stress will ease soon.

 

[Tom Arnold-Hames]

Hi Tracey,

First off let me tell you how sorry I am to here you are feeling unwell. All I can say and be quite confident saying is that things WILL get better. About a week ago my T spiked for the first time for years and years, so first hand I know how distressing it can be. I have T for about 10 years, admittedly the first time I ever heard my T sent me insane and feeling anxious all the time. T is a hard thing to get used to, there is no doubting that. But with the right support and mindfulness, you will learn how to deal with it.

So a week ago I am having the worst hayfever attack ever, my nose and eyes are streaming and off the shelf meds were not doing anything at all. So I went to the doctor who prescribed me Fexofenadine 180mg. Started to take them and 2 days later my ears are screaming! A constant high pitch ringing that seem to buzz my entire skull. Literally awful. I carried on taking my meds for a week and each day seem to get louder and louder. I then decided to look at the side effects, and a very common one was buzzing and ringing ears! Great!

Its still loud, although I stopped taking my meds 2 days ago. I will let you into a secret that has helped me to relax and not focus on my T. Download the App called "Tinnitunes", it is a blue icon with a white music note on it, and play "Sound 2" on there, its a white noise with different frequencies playing all the way through, this will play on its own or you can use another app to put more sounds in there, such as "TaoMix2". Honestly it really helps.

Tracey you have to remember that as soon as you form an emotional bond with your T, thats when it gets worse. Habituation will happen, it just takes time. I habituated 10 years ago and honestly, hand on my heart I have only ever heard it at night, but even then it didn't bother me. When it gets bad all I do is put on these apps for an hour. Its blissful relief.

Keep strong, your brain is better wired than you think and eventually things will get better. Always here if you need to chat!

Tom

 

[Vicki14]

Hugs. We all absolutely understand your suffering. It's completely inhumane xx

 

[glynis]

@Tom Arnold-Hames ,
I take fexofenadine and was on 180mg but now I take 120mg all year round and a nose spray..
love glynis

 

[TracyJS]

Hi Tracey,

First off let me tell you how sorry I am to here you are feeling unwell. All I can say and be quite confident saying is that things WILL get better. About a week ago my T spiked for the first time for years and years, so first hand I know how distressing it can be. I have T for about 10 years, admittedly the first time I ever heard my T sent me insane and feeling anxious all the time. T is a hard thing to get used to, there is no doubting that. But with the right support and mindfulness, you will learn how to deal with it.

So a week ago I am having the worst hayfever attack ever, my nose and eyes are streaming and off the shelf meds were not doing anything at all. So I went to the doctor who prescribed me Fexofenadine 180mg. Started to take them and 2 days later my ears are screaming! A constant high pitch ringing that seem to buzz my entire skull. Literally awful. I carried on taking my meds for a week and each day seem to get louder and louder. I then decided to look at the side effects, and a very common one was buzzing and ringing ears! Great!

Its still loud, although I stopped taking my meds 2 days ago. I will let you into a secret that has helped me to relax and not focus on my T. Download the App called "Tinnitunes", it is a blue icon with a white music note on it, and play "Sound 2" on there, its a white noise with different frequencies playing all the way through, this will play on its own or you can use another app to put more sounds in there, such as "TaoMix2". Honestly it really helps.

Tracey you have to remember that as soon as you form an emotional bond with your T, thats when it gets worse. Habituation will happen, it just takes time. I habituated 10 years ago and honestly, hand on my heart I have only ever heard it at night, but even then it didn't bother me. When it gets bad all I do is put on these apps for an hour. Its blissful relief.

Keep strong, your brain is better wired than you think and eventually things will get better. Always here if you need to chat!

Tom

Thank you for responding. I'm so sorry to hear about your spike. I hope it subsides very soon now that you know it's the medication.

10 years is a long time. It seems like you have managed your tinnitus well and have done well all
these years.

Unfortunately, I could not download the app you recommended. It says it's not a available in the U.S.

Also, since it's been 5 months now, I probably have already attached to tinnitus. I wish I could have let it go or dismissed it early on, but was unable to due to the anxiety it caused.

Thank you again for your support and encouragement. It feels about impossible to believe it can get better right now, but thank you.

Tracy

 

[TracyJS]

Hugs. We all absolutely understand your suffering. It's completely inhumane xx

Thank you, @Vicki14 Hugs to you, too

 

[Tom Arnold-Hames]

Hi Tracy,

Is it 5 months since you first had tinnitus?

 

[Tom Arnold-Hames]

@glynis, did you get ringing in your ears with fexofenadine?

 

[TracyJS]

Hi Tracy,

Is it 5 months since you first had tinnitus?

Yes. It's been 5 months since it started. It started out gradual and intermittent and increased.

 

[Tom Arnold-Hames]

Tracy,

5 months is still VERY early days. I was a mess for at least a year when I first had it. Trust me, YOU WILL habituate my love. It's very early days and of course you will form an emotional bond with it, but you will learn to deal with it. Can I ask what sound you are hearing, and on a scale of 1 to 10 how loud is it. Can you hear it during the day with general background noise, or is it at night?

 

[Nanny chocolate]

Hi Tom
Is it you being licked, by your husband maybe?
Very helpful post from you to Tracy but not only for her.
Eve
@Tom Arnold-Hames

 

[Tom Arnold-Hames]

Sorry about the most unhelpful post by @Nanny chocolate: stupid. I am doing nothing but trying to help my friends in need. Silly.

 

[Tom Arnold-Hames]

For your information that is my and my brother. But cute you think I am gay, like that would have anything to do with it.

 

[Nanny chocolate]

It was the hyphenated surname!!!! Lol, brotherly love.
xx
@Tom Arnold-Hames

 

[Jcb]

@Jcb
It's morning where I am. I have been awake since 3am. Sleep is difficult. Lots of anxiety. I hope your day is better.

I'm sorry, have you managed to get out and about today? Have you had any luck with any relaxing breathing techniques?

 

[Jcb]

It was the hyphenated surname!!!! Lol, brotherly love.
xx
@Tom Arnold-Hames

Hey Eve, been enjoying the weather?

 

[Jcb]

Sorry about the most unhelpful post by @Nanny chocolate: stupid. I am doing nothing but trying to help my friends in need. Silly.

No need to be rude, Eve was simply asking a question, also commented on your helpful post.