Two Year Anniversary with Tinnitus

[Alxtan]

Hello All,

It's been a while since I posted here. Please excuse my english and my grammar. English is not my first language. Anyhow I just wanted to let you know that while I am 95% habituated I still find myself struggling from time to time. This month will be my two year anniversary with T and it is especially bad for me. I now seem to be losing hearing on my left ear sporadically which is causing a spike in my T. I am afraid that this might be an omen of my near future.

I got my T when I forgot to bring earplugs to a two hour rehearsal. I knew something was wrong but being a professional musician I kept my mouth shut and kept on playing. That was two years ago. Now I have completely stopped playing in a band and also stopped teaching and shooting guns altogether. Because of this I can say that T has completely changed my life.

For the most part I am very lucky to have this ailment. I mean I could have cancer or heart disease but then again I am still young. (knock on wood) My point to this post is just to vent a little bit on how I am feeling these days and to share my slightly depressing situation with my T.

I have learned to embrace and accept that I have this. It just sucks that I am afraid to do the things I use to love to do.

Anyhow thank you for listening. Even though I rarely visit here. I still love this site. I was just telling my brother how important these support groups are to people like me. Even the Facebook one that I am a member of is great.

Thanks again and best regards to all.

 

[Lovelyhead]

Your story sounds just like mine! Had it 8 years, pretty much habituated but sometimes it spikes or changes tone and I freak out bigtime!

Also like yourself, I used to enjoy gigs and socialising, but I've become really withdrawn, never go out to meet friends or go to parties where I know it will be loud. Highly paranoid about causing further damage.

When you say you're losing your hearing, is it like a temporary feeling that you lose hearing in one or both ears and suddenly hear a very high pitched noise, which usually lasts between 10 seconds to a few minutes?

 

[FuzzyFrey]

Six years ongoing for me and I feel more or less the same as you about this at times. Most times I am alright and habituated, but on occasion something comes up and I get stuck in the anxiety loop again for a while. Fun! I don't have the same love for concerts and loud events as I used to, even though I tend to wear good earplugs for such things. I refuse to let T stop me from getting out and doing things.

 

[soundmachine]

Happy anniversary! In a few months, I'll have the same. Time to grab a beer and drink to a new sound of music. I pretend it is an electrical instrument from a grunge band. So much for being one of 70% that have no tinnitus after a year. We are special and should be proud!

 

[linearb]

Eighteen year club checking in.

 

[Alxtan]

Thank you for not making me feel alone.

To answer Lovelyhead's question. I lose my hearing on my left ear for hours at a time. It made me realize that we also use our hearing to gauge distance and what is next to us. A couple of times I didn't know there was someone standing next to me. One time I almost bumped into a wall because I didn't sense that there was one behind me.

It's disheartening to think that I am going to lose my hearing on my left ear but like usual I will soldier on. After all it sure beats the alternative.