Dating with Tinnitus and Hyperacusis

[TheDanishGirl]

Pick any guy off Tinnitus Talk and you won't be any burden at all....Fishbone would make a great boyfriend... basically pick somebody who isn't suicidal...

Sure I'll be a burden. I'm damn near suicidal myself, and I don't want to bring anyone down into the gutters with me.

 

[FGG]

I have the perfect boyfriend for you. He's in his mid/late twenties. Pretty good looking red haired bloke.
His name is Matt. He lives in Truro, Nova Scotia. He has severe hyperausis and mild tinnitus.
He spends his days playing video games and going out and about in his X5 (not BMW).

I don't know your red haired friend or @Orions Pain but for some reason I think this combo might work. You might have a knack for this. If they ever start a dating thread, maybe you could help match make.

 

[Bndsmheowqhe]

Not to sidetrack the conversation but only because I'm genuinely curious to your argument, why do you think social media is the cause of this?

It has fueled narcissism to cartoonish extremes.

 

[Orions Pain]

I have the perfect boyfriend for you. He's in his mid/late twenties. Pretty good looking red haired bloke.
His name is Matt. He lives in Truro, Nova Scotia. He has severe hyperausis and mild tinnitus.
He spends his days playing video games and going out and about in his X5 (not BMW).

Should I apply for a fiancé visa now or?? I'm sure Nova Scotia has better insurance options than the US anyways.

 

[Orions Pain]

It has fueled narcissism to cartoonish extremes.

Only with people that were originally predisposed to be narcissist. I know plenty of people who could care less about social media.

 

[Bndsmheowqhe]

Only with people that were originally predisposed to be narcissist. I know plenty of people who could care less about social media.

How many of them are women under 40?

 

[aot]

How many of them are women under 40?

 

[Orions Pain]

How many of them are women under 40?

I'd say most of my female friends aren't narcissistic, we're all 25-26.

I'm not narcissistic.

 

[Orions Pain]

Sure I'll be a burden. I'm damn near suicidal myself, and I don't want to bring anyone down into the gutters with me.

You know how they have schools for the blind? Can we have a center for people with hyperacusis? I just hate the thought of this getting to unbearable levels and being completely alone.

 

[Bndsmheowqhe]

View attachment 36898

"Over the years, these questionnaires have been administered to many samples of college students, and analyses that bring all of the data together reveal that the average narcissism score has been steadily increasing and the average empathy score has been steadily decreasing ever since the questionnaires were developed. The changes are highly significant statistically and sufficiently large that approximately 70 percent of students today score higher on narcissism and lower on empathy than did the average student thirty years ago."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/...s-narcissism-increasing-among-young-americans

"Older individuals have lower narcissism scores and are less susceptible to personality disorders than younger subjects"

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5783345/

 

[MrCrybaby]

Should I apply for a fiancé visa now or?? I'm sure Nova Scotia has better insurance options than the US anyways.

Find love AND figure out how you'll afford future treatment all in one go lol.

 

[dan]

Sure I'll be a burden. I'm damn near suicidal myself, and I don't want to bring anyone down into the gutters with me.

D'you want my number?

 

[Orions Pain]

"Over the years, these questionnaires have been administered to many samples of college students, and analyses that bring all of the data together reveal that the average narcissism score has been steadily increasing and the average empathy score has been steadily decreasing ever since the questionnaires were developed. The changes are highly significant statistically and sufficiently large that approximately 70 percent of students today score higher on narcissism and lower on empathy than did the average student thirty years ago."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/...s-narcissism-increasing-among-young-americans

"Older individuals have lower narcissism scores and are less susceptible to personality disorders than younger subjects"

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5783345/

Lots has changed in the last few years, not just social media.

 

[dan]

Should I apply for a fiancé visa now or?? I'm sure Nova Scotia has better insurance options than the US anyways.

We don't have a fiance visa... we apply for spousal sponsorship... but you can apply from inside Canada (with your fiance)... we do have free basic health insurance, so you can get a free audiogram every month.

 

[Orions Pain]

I don't know your red haired friend or @Orions Pain but for some reason I think this combo might work. You might have a knack for this. If they ever start a dating thread, maybe you could help match make.

Everyone prep your headshots.

 

[Bndsmheowqhe]

I'd say most of my female friends aren't narcissistic, we're all 25-26.

Oy vey.

 

[Bndsmheowqhe]

Lots has changed in the last few years, not just social media.

It has been a significant contributing factor.

 

[FGG]

Everyone prep your headshots.

Then I can help too by offering my low rent service of matching people by my total guess what their Myers Brigg type is. What could go wrong?

 

[Orions Pain]

Oy vey.

The main point is here that it's okay if you don't see the value in a relationship. Nothing is wrong with that and I don't judge you for it. I'm just speaking for myself when I say I absolutely hate being alone and feeling lonely.

I spent a good portion of my life alone being an only child with no family around and not having a lot of friends due to being bullied for being an immigrant.

I was always okay with being alone and not having a ton of friends but once I hit like 22 or so a switch flipped. I've spent almost the last 4 months being completely isolated besides being around my coworkers and parents and personally I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. No human being should be forced into such isolation by a condition. It will slowly eat away at you day by day until you can't stand it. I fear the day when I've finally had enough.

 

[Bndsmheowqhe]

The main point is here that it's okay if you don't see the value in a relationship. Nothing is wrong with that and I don't judge you for it. I'm just speaking for myself when I say I absolutely hate being alone and feeling lonely.

I spent a good portion of my life alone being an only child with no family around and not having a lot of friends due to being bullied for being an immigrant.

I was always okay with being alone and not having a ton of friends but once I hit like 22 or so a switch flipped. I've spent almost the last 4 months being completely isolated besides being around my coworkers and parents and personally I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. No human being should be forced into such isolation by a condition. It will slowly eat away at you day by day until you can't stand it. I fear the day when I've finally had enough.

As a former LICSW I can tell you that this would be the absolute worst time for you to enter a relationship. I would strongly recommend DBT.

 

[Mathew Gould]

The main point is here that it's okay if you don't see the value in a relationship. Nothing is wrong with that and I don't judge you for it. I'm just speaking for myself when I say I absolutely hate being alone and feeling lonely.

I spent a good portion of my life alone being an only child with no family around and not having a lot of friends due to being bullied for being an immigrant.

I was always okay with being alone and not having a ton of friends but once I hit like 22 or so a switch flipped. I've spent almost the last 4 months being completely isolated besides being around my coworkers and parents and personally I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. No human being should be forced into such isolation by a condition. It will slowly eat away at you day by day until you can't stand it. I fear the day when I've finally had enough.

People are programmed either way. I like to be alone a lot, but sometimes I like to do things with others... I have a friend that always needs someone by his side all the time... I bet when you hit 22 and the switch flipped because you thought you had more to offer to the world or another person.

 

[Orions Pain]

As a former LICSW I can tell you that this would be the absolute worst time for you to enter a relationship. I would strongly recommend DBT.

I truly don't see how therapy can help me if my face and ears burn on the daily. If this ever subsides I'd consider therapy to deal with the PTSD, but in the meantime giving someone money to read a script out of a psych textbook while my face feels like someone rubbed icy hot all over it probably won't do much for me except make me more upset.

 

[Bndsmheowqhe]

I truly don't see how therapy can help me if my face and ears burn on the daily. If this ever subsides I'd consider therapy to deal with the PTSD, but in the meantime giving someone money to read a script out of a psych textbook while my face feels like someone rubbed icy hot all over it probably won't do much for me except make me more upset.

Fair enough but keep in mind that a relationship at this point would be even worse. Once you get to a point where the physical problems start to subside I would still recommend DBT. It's different than traditional therapy and can be very helpful for someone with your issues.

 

[Orions Pain]

Fair enough but keep in mind that a relationship at this point would be even worse. Once you get to a point where the physical problems start to subside I would still recommend DBT. It's different than traditional therapy and can be very helpful for someone with your issues.

I don't disagree with this.

 

[RishRamsey]

Then I can help too by offering my low rent service of matching people by my total guess what their Myers Brigg type is. What could go wrong?

You won't find anyone from my country lol

 

[FGG]

You won't find anyone from my country lol

Out of curiosity, where are you from?

 

[RishRamsey]

Out of curiosity, where are you from?

India.

 

[FGG]

India.

There are literally billions of you. I am sure there are a few on here.

 

[RishRamsey]

There are literally billions of you. I am sure there are a few on here.

I know a few people with tinnitus irl. None with hyperacusis though. And certainly no one on this site.

 

[aot]

Reviving this thread because I may or not be going through a bit of a crisis about possibly being utterly alone for the rest of my life due to tinnitus and hyperacusis.

Not a lot of girls into a guy who doesn't go to parties or movies, and wears earplugs whenever he's near traffic.

Any words of advice/encouragement?