Dating with Tinnitus and Hyperacusis

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#121
dan said:
Pick any guy off Tinnitus Talk and you won't be any burden at all....Fishbone would make a great boyfriend... basically pick somebody who isn't suicidal...
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Sure I'll be a burden. I'm damn near suicidal myself, and I don't want to bring anyone down into the gutters with me.
 
#122
dan said:
I have the perfect boyfriend for you. He's in his mid/late twenties. Pretty good looking red haired bloke.
His name is Matt. He lives in Truro, Nova Scotia. He has severe hyperausis and mild tinnitus.
He spends his days playing video games and going out and about in his X5 (not BMW).
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I don't know your red haired friend or @Orions Pain but for some reason I think this combo might work. You might have a knack for this. If they ever start a dating thread, maybe you could help match make.
 
#124
dan said:
I have the perfect boyfriend for you. He's in his mid/late twenties. Pretty good looking red haired bloke.
His name is Matt. He lives in Truro, Nova Scotia. He has severe hyperausis and mild tinnitus.
He spends his days playing video games and going out and about in his X5 (not BMW).
Click to expand...
Should I apply for a fiancé visa now or?? I'm sure Nova Scotia has better insurance options than the US anyways.
 
#127
Bndsmheowqhe said:
How many of them are women under 40?
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old.jpg
 
#129
TheDanishGirl said:
Sure I'll be a burden. I'm damn near suicidal myself, and I don't want to bring anyone down into the gutters with me.
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You know how they have schools for the blind? Can we have a center for people with hyperacusis? I just hate the thought of this getting to unbearable levels and being completely alone.
 
#130
aot said:
View attachment 36898
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"Over the years, these questionnaires have been administered to many samples of college students, and analyses that bring all of the data together reveal that the average narcissism score has been steadily increasing and the average empathy score has been steadily decreasing ever since the questionnaires were developed. The changes are highly significant statistically and sufficiently large that approximately 70 percent of students today score higher on narcissism and lower on empathy than did the average student thirty years ago."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/...s-narcissism-increasing-among-young-americans

"Older individuals have lower narcissism scores and are less susceptible to personality disorders than younger subjects"

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5783345/
 
#133
Bndsmheowqhe said:
"Over the years, these questionnaires have been administered to many samples of college students, and analyses that bring all of the data together reveal that the average narcissism score has been steadily increasing and the average empathy score has been steadily decreasing ever since the questionnaires were developed. The changes are highly significant statistically and sufficiently large that approximately 70 percent of students today score higher on narcissism and lower on empathy than did the average student thirty years ago."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/...s-narcissism-increasing-among-young-americans

"Older individuals have lower narcissism scores and are less susceptible to personality disorders than younger subjects"

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5783345/
Click to expand...
Lots has changed in the last few years, not just social media.
 
#134
Orions Pain said:
Should I apply for a fiancé visa now or?? I'm sure Nova Scotia has better insurance options than the US anyways.
Click to expand...
We don't have a fiance visa... we apply for spousal sponsorship... but you can apply from inside Canada (with your fiance)... we do have free basic health insurance, so you can get a free audiogram every month.
 
#139
Bndsmheowqhe said:
Oy vey.
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The main point is here that it's okay if you don't see the value in a relationship. Nothing is wrong with that and I don't judge you for it. I'm just speaking for myself when I say I absolutely hate being alone and feeling lonely.

I spent a good portion of my life alone being an only child with no family around and not having a lot of friends due to being bullied for being an immigrant.

I was always okay with being alone and not having a ton of friends but once I hit like 22 or so a switch flipped. I've spent almost the last 4 months being completely isolated besides being around my coworkers and parents and personally I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. No human being should be forced into such isolation by a condition. It will slowly eat away at you day by day until you can't stand it. I fear the day when I've finally had enough.
 
#140
Orions Pain said:
The main point is here that it's okay if you don't see the value in a relationship. Nothing is wrong with that and I don't judge you for it. I'm just speaking for myself when I say I absolutely hate being alone and feeling lonely.

I spent a good portion of my life alone being an only child with no family around and not having a lot of friends due to being bullied for being an immigrant.

I was always okay with being alone and not having a ton of friends but once I hit like 22 or so a switch flipped. I've spent almost the last 4 months being completely isolated besides being around my coworkers and parents and personally I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. No human being should be forced into such isolation by a condition. It will slowly eat away at you day by day until you can't stand it. I fear the day when I've finally had enough.
Click to expand...
As a former LICSW I can tell you that this would be the absolute worst time for you to enter a relationship. I would strongly recommend DBT.
 
#141
Orions Pain said:
The main point is here that it's okay if you don't see the value in a relationship. Nothing is wrong with that and I don't judge you for it. I'm just speaking for myself when I say I absolutely hate being alone and feeling lonely.

I spent a good portion of my life alone being an only child with no family around and not having a lot of friends due to being bullied for being an immigrant.

I was always okay with being alone and not having a ton of friends but once I hit like 22 or so a switch flipped. I've spent almost the last 4 months being completely isolated besides being around my coworkers and parents and personally I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. No human being should be forced into such isolation by a condition. It will slowly eat away at you day by day until you can't stand it. I fear the day when I've finally had enough.
Click to expand...
People are programmed either way. I like to be alone a lot, but sometimes I like to do things with others... I have a friend that always needs someone by his side all the time... I bet when you hit 22 and the switch flipped because you thought you had more to offer to the world or another person.
 
#142
Bndsmheowqhe said:
As a former LICSW I can tell you that this would be the absolute worst time for you to enter a relationship. I would strongly recommend DBT.
Click to expand...
I truly don't see how therapy can help me if my face and ears burn on the daily. If this ever subsides I'd consider therapy to deal with the PTSD, but in the meantime giving someone money to read a script out of a psych textbook while my face feels like someone rubbed icy hot all over it probably won't do much for me except make me more upset.
 
#143
Orions Pain said:
I truly don't see how therapy can help me if my face and ears burn on the daily. If this ever subsides I'd consider therapy to deal with the PTSD, but in the meantime giving someone money to read a script out of a psych textbook while my face feels like someone rubbed icy hot all over it probably won't do much for me except make me more upset.
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Fair enough but keep in mind that a relationship at this point would be even worse. Once you get to a point where the physical problems start to subside I would still recommend DBT. It's different than traditional therapy and can be very helpful for someone with your issues.
 
#144
Bndsmheowqhe said:
Fair enough but keep in mind that a relationship at this point would be even worse. Once you get to a point where the physical problems start to subside I would still recommend DBT. It's different than traditional therapy and can be very helpful for someone with your issues.
Click to expand...
I don't disagree with this.
 
#150
Reviving this thread because I may or not be going through a bit of a crisis about possibly being utterly alone for the rest of my life due to tinnitus and hyperacusis.

Not a lot of girls into a guy who doesn't go to parties or movies, and wears earplugs whenever he's near traffic.

Any words of advice/encouragement?
 
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