My faith has taken a nosedive since my onset. It is hard to reconcile the idea of a loving God with this condition. I just read in these forums that someone knows a 5-year-old with T. A child that young? I don't know. If there truly is a God, then why does He let things like that happen? I am afraid the answer is there is no God. Period.
It is a weird concept for me to accept, though. It is hard to accept that something you believed in most of your life might be a big lie.
I feel so hopeless it's not even funny. But this is where I find solace in the idea of suicide. It's a one way ticket out of here, for sure, but if there's no God, no hope for a cure next year or the year after that, then at least suicide does not seem so bad.
I am having such a hard time with this. Where is the God I prayed to as a child? Is it something I did in a previous life?
(sigh).