Carol... I'm one of the "oldies", and yeah I have a rather 'exceptional' and multi-layered T story. However, there are a number of ways to interpret what one could see as a fairly disastrous affair with this affliction.
- One way would be to indeed feel discouraged that one can get T four times with increasing volumes each time.
- Another way would be to see that I habituated
very successfully twice, and with difficulty a third time because I had added hyperacusis. But I did get my life back enough to travel widely and even dance
Gangnam Style on stage (see "Positivity Thread" for the video proof) with no earplugs in! Took a while but I got there.
- Yeah this fourth time is hard and is proving difficult, but I am in better shape psychologically now (even with
another thing in a long list of things pulling me down - infected root canal molar just removed, lip stitched up, etc. feeling like hell yet still have a divorce finance meeting tomorrow...Sigh!) than I was a year ago. That is progress. For sure the T and H restrict my life a great deal, but read most of my posts on this site, and the majority I hope, are not pools of depression. I hope that's true
but I could be delusional.
- I do hear you though, that the reality of what can happen with T, and successive more T, is not a happy thought. Yes it could bring anyone down. But look at it this way...It is fact! It can happen! it happened to me! Perhaps by sharing that it will give pause to some who I think are a bit 'cavalier' about assuming that once habituated it's all over and go riding off into the sunset, ready to hitch their horse at a disco, etc.
- Yes, sometimes this suffering feels unbearable, but I AM STILL HERE! That too is a statement.
- Also the vast majority of T sufferers are NOT going to be as complex and weird as my case, and those: "You will get through this and more or less forget about it!" statements are true. And hey, make no mistake, I get tired of hearing
those without typing a "Yes, but...". However I don't for the most part, unless I fell it is really warranted within that discussion.
- We are here to share and indeed I felt hesitant about replying and for a moment wondered if I should quit posting if it were only bumming people out. I quickly realized though that I feel it would be a disservice to hold back and not share my truths and reality despite them being 'not so rosy', so long as I continue to try and do so in a balanced way. Truth is truth. It's mine. People must make their own decisions about how to accept or reject that.
- Finally, you
do need to look at the Retigabine thread, it's getting to be pretty heady stuff! It's too soon to say yet, but this is way important and a real validation for Autifony as well.
Ha, ha...Yeah, as a footnote, I do still have my POLST form as I understand where you are coming from and why all to well. Suffering
does suck. That's why I hope I go out with some boxing gloves on to beat the hell out of whoever put it into the Grand Design!!!
Take gentle care Carol... Best, Zimichael