@Tara Lyons
Lots of us have been where you are so please trust us, take a deep breath and get yourself some help right now.
Have you seen your doctor? Are you taking any medications for depression or panic or sleep? Please talk to a professional about how you are feeling and let them help you.
What are you doing to relax? I know it's so hard to do when you have the noise in your head but there are ways to make it easier. For me strong physical sensations – like a hot bath or a massage or even sex – get me out of my head and into my body and make me feel better.
Have you seen an audiologist? Or are you doing any kind of therapy? I found CBT really helped me. When you are feeling this bad you really need to be seeing someone once a week at a minimum – it really helps to have a professional to check in with. They will be able to listen to you and tell you that you're not crazy. And they can teach you techniques to cope.
Also it sounds like you are going through a spike and you are just overwhelmed right now. It's normal for tinnitus to change a in the first few months. I think it will settle down to a more manageable level. Try not to monitor it, or give to much thought to the changes. It doesn't really matter in the end – what matters is getting you back to feeling better. And believe it or not you CAN feel better, no matter what your tinnitus is doing.
Lizzy
Xxx