Tinnitus Is Not Tinnitus...

[Jazzer]

Healing only starts when we have accepted the reality of what we have.
An acceptance of reality is crucial.

For the severe sufferer it is unfortunately a life changing experience.
I can not now have my old life back.

What I can do is recognise that my life has taken a sad but different direction.

However, I am still here.
I am lucky enough to be part of a loving family.
By the daily use of deep relaxation, meditation, walks, in the park, 'pussycats' etc.... I am once again enjoying my life - a different life to the one I had planned, but a life no less.

You may see all of the above as negative Fishbone.
I definitely see it as positive.

I suppose we have to accept that as individuals we are very different, and probably have to find and make our own way forward.

 

[fishbone]

Healing only starts when we have accepted the reality of what we have.
An acceptance of reality is crucial.

For the severe sufferer it is unfortunately a life changing experience.
I can not now have my old life back.

What I can do is recognise that my life has taken a sad but different direction.

However, I am still here.
I am lucky enough to be part of a loving family.
By the daily use of deep relaxation, meditation, walks, in the park, 'pussycats' etc.... I am once again enjoying my life - a different life to the one I had planned, but a life no less.

You may see all of the above as negative Fishbone.
I definitely see it as positive.

Let me touch on some points in this post you just made -

Healing only starts when we have accepted the reality of what we have: Read my thousands of posts, I am the one always preaching acceptance. If you have accepted your reality, why not make your life better? Why create threads that have a negative feel to them? By you typing what you keep typing it becomes who YOU are. Post positive threads, then you can reap some peace and positivity. Post negative threads it will give you that as well. It's basic human psychology.

You say that your life has taken a sad but different direction - hey man, all of us have had life dump on us. I can create thousands of threads about how life has chewed me up and spit me out. What good does that do me? How does this lead to healing? It doesn't. It just re-lives your oppression and manifests it.

You can claim that this thread is an amazing and positive thread, but why fool yourself?

 

[Tinker Bell]

Healing only starts when we have accepted the reality of what we have.
An acceptance of reality is crucial.

For the severe sufferer it is unfortunately a life changing experience.
I can not now have my old life back.

What I can do is recognise that my life has taken a sad but different direction.

However, I am still here.
I am lucky enough to be part of a loving family.
By the daily use of deep relaxation, meditation, walks, in the park, 'pussycats' etc.... I am once again enjoying my life - a different life to the one I had planned, but a life no less.

You may see all of the above as negative Fishbone.
I definitely see it as positive.

You are finding a way to enjoy your life? Someone seeing you walk in the park may think that others with tinnitus should be able to do the same. Your ability to walk in a park and enjoy life again does not show the full spectrum, it does not show the severity.

Oh wait, that's not right. No one seeing you in public should make assumptions about your personal condition. Perhaps we could extend the same courtesy to others . . . like for example, maybe we could empathize with a journalist who tweets that her tinnitus is bothering her.

 

[fishbone]

Please don't confuse Tinnitus shamers with Mild tinnitus sufferers, it seems like most of these attacks are directed at people who are least deserving of them. Remember who it is you are having issues with, and don't harbor resentment at those who are in the same camp with you.

If your post is directed at me, I care and have empathy for all that suffer. That is why I came here to make my post. I want folks to get better and live their lives. I am not shaming any person that suffers from tinnitus, whether it is mild or intrusive. I just want them to not flock to negative circus threads and cope and live their lives....

 

[coffee_girl]

If your post is directed at me, I care and have empathy for all that suffer. That is why I came here to make my post. I want folks to get better and live their lives. I am not shaming any person that suffers from tinnitus, whether it is mild or intrusive. I just want them to not flock to negative circus threads and cope and live their lives....

None of my posts have ever and will ever apply to you, you and Ed are some of the best on this forum

 

[Jazzer]

Well my point about 'all being different' fell on stony ground.
Whether you like to believe it or not - we definitely are all very different.
I wouldn't mind betting that I tie my boot laces different to you ?

I would hate martial arts - being kicked and thumped and all the rest of it.
Don't get me wrong - I am glad you love it - it clearly does something for you - but it wouldn't do anything for me.

By the way, I would never claim that my posts are 'amazing,' or even particularly significant.
I write for my own satisfaction. That is all.
I write to express my own thoughts and feelings, and to better understand myself.
When I was trying to recover from a schizoid depressive childhood I wrote dozens of diaries, for the benefit of nobody else but myself.
I would write them, read them, and begin to understand myself.
Nobody ever read those diaries but myself.
Guess what - I eventually got better from a childhood totally devoid of bonding.
With my desperate start in life I could have become a drug addict, an alcoholic, a psychopath etc....
But I didn't. I took my own council and I healed.
Understanding the truth of what happened to me was not the same thing as being negative, as you like to put it.
It was an exercise in the acceptance of reality.

You have said on several occasions that your relationship with your parents was very good, if I remember it right.
Forgive me if I have misquoted you, but that is how I remember it.
Well - lucky old you - I say.
My mother was too mentally ill to love me.
I followed my own intuition - and and I was right - I made it through.

Finally, (I quote) "You can claim that this thread is an amazing and positive thread, but why fool yourself?"

My guess is that you clearly see me as a self obsessed egotist, that likes the sound of their own voice
- and that appears to be getting up your nose.
It doesn't actually bother me Fishbone.
I have a fair idea of who I am, and given my success in self treating the minefield of mental illness, I will tackle this issue my own way.

Did you just say to me "why fool yourself?"

Well "why kid yourself?"

 

[fishbone]

Well my point about 'all being different' fell on stony ground.
Whether you like to believe it or not - we definitely are all very different.
I wouldn't mind betting that I tie my boot laces different to you ?

I would hate martial arts - being kicked and thumped and all the rest of it.
Don't get me wrong - I am glad you love it - it clearly does something for you - but it wouldn't do anything for me.

By the way, I would never claim that my posts are 'amazing,' or even particularly significant.
I write for my own satisfaction. That is all.
I write to express my own thoughts and feelings, and to better understand myself.
When I was trying to recover from a schizoid depressive childhood I wrote dozens of diaries, for the benefit of nobody else but myself.
I would write them, read them, and begin to understand myself.
Nobody ever read those diaries but myself.
Guess what - I eventually got better from a childhood totally devoid of bonding.
With my desperate start in life I could have become a drug addict, an alcoholic, a psychopath etc....
But I didn't. I took my own council and I healed.
Understanding the truth of what happened to me was not the same thing as being negative, as you like to put it.
It was an exercise in the acceptance of reality.

You have said on several occasions that your relationship with your parents was very good, if I remember it right.
Forgive me if I have misquoted you, but that is how I remember it.
Well - lucky old you - I say.
My mother was too mentally ill to love me.
I followed my own intuition - and and I was right - I made it through.

Finally, (I quote) "You can claim that this thread is an amazing and positive thread, but why fool yourself?"

My guess is that you clearly see me as a self obsessed egotist, that likes the sound of their own voice
- and that appears to be getting up your nose.
It doesn't actually bother me Fishbone.
I have a fair idea of who I am, and given my success in self treating the minefield of mental illness, I will tackle this issue my own way.

Did you just say to me "why fool yourself?"

Well "why kid yourself?"

Dave I give you credit for being a warrior and making it in this dog eat dog life. I have been down that ugly alley 1000s of times myself. I do not say that you are an egoist and you are tooting your own horn. Be proud of your accomplishments, achievements. Be very proud. At the same time, don't hold yourself back either. I can read it through your posts that you are struggling and possibly bad. You and I even had a pm and you were very honest with me. My point is not the make you look like a bad person, not at all.

I cannot tolerate constant negativity and oppression. Words can influence people, influence can make us act. Our acts and lack of it can affect our lives. I sincerely care for people like you and others that suffer. I want for you to get better and enjoy your life more. That's why I say possibly go and speak to a counselor. Talking to someone is a great thing and I owe so much to the lady That I see each month.

The life I live is blunt, brutal and straight to the point everyday. It's crazy hard but I warrior through it and make it through another day. I come here to give this board strength. To give this board courage, to motivate and help people move forward.

I know that you are a good person and have a good heart, but you do create lots of threads that are negative and then the flock starts......

I can write so many things right now and how my life is just crazy and wicked. I don't because I know I will beat my oppression and defeat my obstacles. It's that kind of thinking that helps us win. It's the thinking that I WILL BE OK. I WILL BEAT MY OBSTACLES. NOTHING IS GONNA STOP ME! I say these things 1000s of times and trust me they DO WORK!

Hope you feel better dave, I do not dislike you...I just hate negativity and being held back

Each day is a gift, each day is precious, never let anything hold you back!

 

[Jazzer]

You are finding a way to enjoy your life? Someone seeing you walk in the park may think that others with tinnitus should be able to do the same. Your ability to walk in a park and enjoy life again does not show the full spectrum, it does not show the severity.

Oh wait, that's not right. No one seeing you in public should make assumptions about your personal condition. Perhaps we could extend the same courtesy to others . . . like for example, maybe we could empathize with a journalist who tweets that her tinnitus is bothering her.

Well of course Tinker Bell when I walk in the park I am simply walking in the park, not talking on camera about what it is like to walk in the park.
But I've had quite enough of posts and responses for one day, so excuse me for now TB.
Dave x

 

[Tinker Bell]

Well of course Tinker Bell when I walk in the park I am simply walking in the park, not talking on camera about what it is like to walk in the park.
But I've had quite enough of posts and responses for one day, so excuse me for now TB.
Dave x

And she was not talking on camera either. Twitter is not the same as an interview.

Wish you a good day, perhaps tomorrow you can address why we should criticize someone for posting on social media when they are struggling with tinnitus.

 

[Jazzer]

Dave I give you credit for being a warrior and making it in this dog eat dog life. I have been down that ugly alley 1000s of times myself. I do not say that you are an egoist and you are tooting your own horn. Be proud of your accomplishments, achievements. Be very proud. At the same time, don't hold yourself back either. I can read it through your posts that you are struggling and possibly bad. You and I even had a pm and you were very honest with me. My point is not the make you look like a bad person, not at all.

I cannot tolerate constant negativity and oppression. Words can influence people, influence can make us act. Our acts and lack of it can affect our lives. I sincerely care for people like you and others that suffer. I want for you to get better and enjoy your life more. That's why I say possibly go and speak to a counselor. Talking to someone is a great thing and I owe so much to the lady That I see each month.

The life I live is blunt, brutal and straight to the point everyday. It's crazy hard but I warrior through it and make it through another day. I come here to give this board strength. To give this board courage, to motivate and help people move forward.

I know that you are a good person and have a good heart, but you do create lots of threads that are negative and then the flock starts......

I can write so many things right now and how my life is just crazy and wicked. I don't because I know I will beat my oppression and defeat my obstacles. It's that kind of thinking that helps us win. It's the thinking that I WILL BE OK. I WILL BEAT MY OBSTACLES. NOTHING IS GONNA STOP ME! I say these things 1000s of times and trust me they DO WORK!

Hope you feel better dave, I do not dislike you...I just hate negativity and being held back

Each day is a gift, each day is precious, never let anything hold you back!

Bless your heart Fish. Nice post.

However - "I can read it through your posts you are struggling, and possibly bad...etc...."

I am doing pretty good my friend.
I must remind you - at my very worst, when I could hardly get off the couch, you said to me "Dave my ears are screaming - and if I can make it, you can make it."
Guess what - I decided to believe you - and I'm still here."
There is not much doubt that we see things differently Fishbone, but I will never forget how you helped me then.

Incidentally, I never see my posts as negative.
I believe they come out of an acceptance of reality, resulting in positivity.
But I must leave you to your own judgement buddy. xx

 

[Greg Sacramento]

Yes it very difficult to deal with severe tinnitus, but all tinnitus is caused by something physical and then physical body and mind hypertension interacts to various degrees.

Everyone with long standing tinnitus will face an uphill challenge when they get older.

This is why I focus on those with physical and disease conditions because one or more problems will happen to you.

Full awareness of possibilities is needed. More drugs are often taken as you get older, colds and the flu, noise factors for aging ears, the neck and jaw may come into play, posture, muscles, veins, nerves and bones - the list is endless.

 

[Samantha R]

Most 'sufferers' have it mildly.
I did, for over twenty years.
A veritable 'stroll in the park.'

Not for me.
I accidentally deleted my original post, but I can assure you, it's not a stroll in the park for me with my "mild" tinnitus.

I think about my "mild" tinnitus every day.
I worry about the screams, cries and shouts of my children damaging my ears.
I am constantly telling them to quiet down.
I worry about unexpected noise exposure
I worry about my tinnitus getting worse.
I worry about how my tinnitus will be when I'm older and my hearing degenerates.

I worry about a worsening before my very young children are grown, how will I cope and how will it affect them.

I might not hear my tinnitus all day every day, but it's on my mind for a lot of the day.
I don't have it easy either Dave....

I never debate with members but I feel strongly that we have to unite for the good of everyone.

Segregating us according to the volume level of our tinnitus is going to do no good for a united cause.

When a treatment or cure comes along that helps someone with noise induced severe tinnitus and someone with noise induced mild tinnitus, it's gonna be the same cure.

I find the kind of rhetoric in this thread and in the thread on Susanna Reid very divisive.

 

[Samantha R]

So some of you need to understand that people with mild T talking about like it's a total breeze may raise awareness but they can also bury some of us completely and take away all our support.

Yes Bam, for sure, and that angers me and I have relatively mild tinnitus. We all don't do that though.
My dad has what I define as most probably severe tinnitus. He hears it over everything as far as I can ascertain.
I didn't even know he'd had tinnitus for 20 years, he is not bothered in the slightest by it, and could not understand why I was so upset by mine.
That's someone with severe tinnitus who downplayed my suffering with mild tinnitus, which is exactly what Michael and Dave did to Susanna, but for other reasons.
That's not great either.

Education is key here - which is why I'm so passionately angered by the comments made about Susanna Reid.
She tweeted that her tinnitus was loud, like one of those old broken TVs or something or other. She said "I deal with it mostly" - but obviously struggles at times, and most probably will for the rest of her life given she's already had it for over a decade.
That doesn't sound pleasant to me....

 

[Bam]

My dad has what I define as most probably severe tinnitus. He hears it over everything as far as I can ascertain.
I didn't even know he'd had tinnitus for 20 years, he is not bothered in the slightest by it, and could not understand why I was so upset by mine.
That's someone with severe tinnitus who downplayed my suffering with mild tinnitus.

That's really quite incredible. If only we could bottle whatever your Dad has in his noggin. I have zero reason to doubt he's being honest but how the holy f*** does he not care?!?

It's genuinely baffling that someone like me can totally lose their shit despite no history of mental problems and a pretty sturdy character and someone like your Dad can just 'accept' that screaming 24/7 head noise is acceptable and no barrier to a normal life.

I cannot get my head around it. This to me is worse than being paralysed or being told I have terminal cancer. And yet your Dad has lived happily for 20 years with it.

I don't doubt it. I just don't know how we can possibly react so differently. I wish I did. I wish I could switch my brain to simply not caring.

 

[Samantha R]

That's really quite incredible. If only we could bottle whatever your Dad has in his noggin. I have zero reason to doubt he's being honest but how the holy f*** does he not care?!?

It's genuinely baffling that someone like me can totally lose their shit despite no history of mental problems and a pretty sturdy character and someone like your Dad can just 'accept' that screaming 24/7 head noise is acceptable and no barrier to a normal life.

I cannot get my head around it. This to me is worse than being paralysed or being told I have terminal cancer. And yet your Dad has lived happily for 20 years with it.

I don't doubt it. I just don't know how we can possibly react so differently. I wish I did. I wish I could switch my brain to simply not caring.

I know Bam, I don't get it either.
It's a hissing noise heard in his left ear. He said to me a few months ago that it was starting up in his right ear too, intermittently, but that may be constant by now, I haven't asked him.
He must have some hearing loss, he's 71, worked in noisy environment in his younger years with no ear protection...
He can hear it over 85db airplane noise, he can hear it in a noisy restaurant, pretty much everywhere.
I asked him about sleep - he said that sometimes he thinks "that's loud", but just shifts his focus and is able to rest.
I know Billie48 on this forum is also dealing with severe tinnitus but is not in the slightest bothered by it anymore. I think he's overcome it with mindfulness, CBT and time. Have you ever corresponded with him? He's truly remarkable, and by his descriptions, he has tinnitus of the worst kind.
I'm not advocating these psychological treatments, but in the absence of anything else, they've worked for him. He's truly a legend.

I mentioned a member here MikeP505 who went deaf and had unrelenting, loud, unmaskable tinnitus. He told me he was suicidal initially, not only from the noise but the isolation of losing his hearing. Somehow, he found a way to the other side.

I guess it can be done, but don't ask me how. I don't think that I could, I'd feel the same as you. Hell, I wanted to kill myself after getting mild tinnitus.

 

[Jazzer]

Not for me.
I accidentally deleted my original post, but I can assure you, it's not a stroll in the park for me with my "mild" tinnitus.

I think about my "mild" tinnitus every day.
I worry about the screams, cries and shouts of my children damaging my ears.
I am constantly telling them to quiet down.
I worry about unexpected noise exposure
I worry about my tinnitus getting worse.
I worry about how my tinnitus will be when I'm older and my hearing degenerates.

I worry about a worsening before my very young children are grown, how will I cope and how will it affect them.

I might not hear my tinnitus all day every day, but it's on my mind for a lot of the day.
I don't have it easy either Dave....

I never debate with members but I feel strongly that we have to unite for the good of everyone.

Segregating us according to the volume level of our tinnitus is going to do no good for a united cause.

When a treatment or cure comes along that helps someone with noise induced severe tinnitus and someone with noise induced mild tinnitus, it's gonna be the same cure.

I find the kind of rhetoric in this thread and in the thread on Susanna Reid very divisive.

I have obviously offended you and I am sorry.
I mean it.
I am sorry Samantha.

When mine started 28 years ago it really bugged me; I tried acupuncture which was useless.
It never ever dipped, but in my case I got used to it and accepted it almost as if is was no real bother.

For the past four years it has been full on the whole time, and I just have to accept it because I have no choice of course.
I guess I am getting a bit better at dealing with it.

I agree with your comments by the way.
I want to make no excuses, but have to accept that because some of us are dealing with a real effing monster, we probably get quite short tempered at times.

I apologise to you Samantha - perhaps I can try to learn something here......x
Dave x

 

[Samantha R]

I have obviously offended you and I am sorry.
I mean it.
I am sorry Samantha.

Thanks for your message Dave, but you don't need to apologise. I am not offended, just disappointed I guess, not with you, but at someone else for the way they spoke about Susanna sharing her story. Most people who commented on that thread felt the same as me about the comments, even those with severe tinnitus.

I feel for those suffering severely, hearing Bam, Glynis and Telis struggling breaks my heart, it really does, and I'm angry that there is nothing that can be done to help.

It also scares me to think that could be me one day.

I am glad that you can generally live well with severe tinnitus and things have gotten better for you with time - that gives me hope. You have coping methods that you share and that's invaluable.

I have a lot of respect for you Dave, you have a kind heart and time for everyone and you've lost a lot due to your tinnitus.

I just feel passionately that we should stick together on this one.

 

[Jazzer]

I know Bam, I don't get it either.
It's a hissing noise heard in his left ear. He said to me a few months ago that it was starting up in his right ear too, intermittently, but that may be constant by now, I haven't asked him.
He must have some hearing loss, he's 71, worked in noisy environment in his younger years with no ear protection...
He can hear it over 85db airplane noise, he can hear it in a noisy restaurant, pretty much everywhere.
I asked him about sleep - he said that sometimes he thinks "that's loud", but just shifts his focus and is able to rest.
I know Billie48 on this forum is also dealing with severe tinnitus but is not in the slightest bothered by it anymore. I think he's overcome it with mindfulness, CBT and time. Have you ever corresponded with him? He's truly remarkable, and by his descriptions, he has tinnitus of the worst kind.
I'm not advocating these psychological treatments, but in the absence of anything else, they've worked for him. He's truly a legend.

I mentioned a member here MikeP505 who went deaf and had unrelenting, loud, unmaskable tinnitus. He told me he was suicidal initially, not only from the noise but the isolation of losing his hearing. Somehow, he found a way to the other side.

I guess it can be done, but don't ask me how. I don't think that I could, I'd feel the same as you. Hell, I wanted to kill myself after getting mild tinnitus.

I wake up each morning and my first response is just disbelief at what I am expected to hear all day long.
Soon after I just have to go into acceptance mode, and thereafter I hear it and cope.

There is no sound I ever hear that obliterates it.
If I hold an electric Braun foil type shaver close to my left ear it is a match, at 60 dbs.

 

[Greg Sacramento]

@Bam: I'm almost completely convinced that you are having reaction to your parasympathetic nervous system which leads to the automatic and sympathetic nervous systems. Many others here as well, including some of your friends, but Dave isn't one.

There's physical and lifestyle treatments - non mindfulness or CBT that should ready help. One area of focus to be considered is your occipital nerve.

I use highly professional medical data systems, then I compare the narrowing down (given) to case studies and if there's any doubt then I will do added research and provide links. I have done this for many and gave treatments to discuss with their doctors. Recently I did not receive a response from three posters asking for help where I spent several hours using data bases. Some just don't want to face the truth. The youngest one of these three at this time probably has very mild tinnitus if at all, as he avoids answering concerns of those trying to help him.

Basic information:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peripheral_nervous_system

 

[Jazzer]

@Bam: I'm almost completely convinced that you are having reaction to your parasympathetic nervous system which leads to the automatic and sympathetic nervous systems. Many others here as well, including some of your friends, but Dave isn't one.

There's physical and lifestyle treatments - non mindfulness or CBT that should ready help. One area of focus to be considered is your occipital nerve.

I use highly professional medical data systems, then I compare the narrowing down (given) to case studies and if there's any doubt then I will do added research and provide links. I have done this for many and gave treatments to discuss with their doctors. Recently I did not receive a response from three posters asking for help where I spent several hours using data bases. Some just don't want to face the truth. The youngest one of these three at this time probably has very mild tinnitus if at all, as he avoids answering concerns of those trying to help him.

Basic information:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peripheral_nervous_system

Bloody hell Greg,
you're a regular boffin !!

 

[coffee_girl]

@Samantha R
Has your dad been through some crazy things in his life? For example, my family are all refugees from a 3rd world country and we battled some crazy things to get here to the US, my parents have been captured and jailed, tortured, seen people get killed, seen their friends get executed etc. Nothing ever bothers them, because they have been through everything. My mother especially is hard as nails, she has been close to dead so many times...nothing phases her at all.

 

[derpytia]

I like to share something with all of you. I am reading TONS of posts like this by the OP, first the trojan horse, this one and quite few other ones. I will be very blunt with all of you. These types of posts do not lead to healing. Re-living your agony and keep saying it in multiple posts will NOT lead to healing.

You are basically feeding your mind/soul the misery that tinnitus can bring on. Yes, tinnitus is a horrible ordeal and no one knows it better than myself. 30+ years of this is quite a long time and I have been through all the roller coaster rides that all of you are riding right now. You feed your mind misery, it will arise more in life. You feed it strength, you can become strong.

I truly understand that this board is filled with MANY that suffer from this dreadful condition. It's not a disease but a condition that has affected many of our lives. It's ok to gripe, vent and ask for support because of your tinnitus. If you want to experience healing (healing can happen when we habituate/cope/move forward AND MOVE ON) then I suggest that you focus on posts that can add value to your life. threads such as this one provides little value if any.

I highly suggest that if folks are troubled by tinnitus, then go and speak to a counselor and talk face to face. This board is a godsend but it does not compare to talking to an actual person. NO, meds are not always necessary. NO, the therapist DOES NOT need to have tinnitus to understand or care. They simply need to be a caring therapist that CARES about you. I do this myself, not because of the tinnitus because of the grief of losing parents.

If you folks truly want to get better and live your lives, then avoid the constant negativity. Avoid taking time to re-live your misery that tinnitus can bring. I have done it myself and I did it for many years and in the end it only held me back. You can either read and listen to what I say or just keep on and reap these negative threads. These negative habits will become you more and more. Instead try to find solutions to coping, build a better support system, this is much better than flocking to negative posts and let them sink into your minds...

I suffer from intrusive tinnitus with no support each day and I still live a good life. The choice is all yours, I have made mine and I am very glad to not let tinnitus get the best of me.

This is where I have to put in my 2 cents worth.

Please remember that every single person on this forum is an individual. Tinnitus is our common denominator but we are all still individual people with unique life experiences, strengths, weaknesses, and personalities. Some of us cannot even afford to go to a therapist or doctor whenever we'd like for various reasons!

Congratulations on finding a way back into the light. But don't assume that what works for you is applicable to everyone else. Even a simple therapist knows that much! Touting your own success all over the place and insisting that everyone who isn't where you are is just weak and not truly trying is close to being a blatant insult.

"You can either read and listen to what I say or just keep on and reap these negative threads."
Are you kidding me right now?? You are not the chosen one or even the second coming of Christ. Don't let your glaring success rob you of simple compassion and understanding. Please stop and check yourself before posting things like this.

This is a SUPPORT forum. Those of us with severe tinnitus (like myself) will ALWAYS need support whether that comes in the form of well wishes, an expression of sympathy, or just plain LISTENING. Our suffering is not going away and no amount of pretending, ignoring, or positive thoughts is going to change that. We unhappy sufferers have no choice but to carry on as best we can and we have every right to cry and be sad or angry.

Strength is no necessarily pushing through every obstacle and conquering every illness. Sometimes real strength is living and just existing from day to day with our suffering. Do not take that away from us and tell us that we are just spreading negativity with our cries for help and compassion.

So ends my two cents.

 

[Samantha R]

Has your dad been through some crazy things in his life? For example, my family are all refugees from a 3rd world country and we battled some crazy things to get here to the US, my parents have been captured and jailed, tortured, seen people get killed, seen their friends get executed etc. Nothing ever bothers them, because they have been through everything. My mother especially is hard as nails, she has been close to dead so many times...nothing phases her at all.

I'm so sorry for your family's suffering... that sounds awful, the kind of experience that would scar you for life.
I can certainly understand how this experience would harden you. I am glad they found a better life in the US.

No, my dad has been through nothing crazy, he's lead a completely normal life.
I don't get him at all - he has high anxiety, I mean really bad....
I remember during my childhood he'd be stressing so bad about losing his job (which he never did, or was never in danger of according to my mum). He'd stress so much, and I remember my sister and I worrying too just because of his stress.

He worries about everything - but not his tinnitus.
He recently had cataract surgery, and the way he has carried on about such a simple procedure is mind blowing!
He also had to have a colonoscopy last year after a positive bowel screen result. They way he stressed about that, about the .01% risk that something adverse might happen to him during the procedure drove my mother and I crazy.
They ended up finding pre-cancerous polyps (ie. another few months and he'd have full blown bowel cancer). Still says he won't have another follow up colonoscopy....

He stresses when my kids fall over, that they are going to bump their heads, the list goes on.

All the time there's a full blown gas leak sound in his head and he couldn't care less.
Go figure.

 

[just1morething]

I wake up each morning and my first response is just disbelief at what I am expected to hear all day long.

Same here. Maybe he is to blame?

 

[Zeneth]

My tinnitus is somewhat mild, and it's the constant, haunting thought of it getting worse that gets to me.

 

[85dB T]

Touting your own success all over the place and insisting that everyone who isn't where you are is just weak and not truly trying is close to being a blatant insult.

This isn't Fishbone. He sufferers and only wants to help. His message is one of being positive and physically active to better deal with T.

 

[Telis]

"You can either read and listen to what I say or just keep on and reap these negative threads."

Im sure the guy gets zero respect in REAL life...you can tell by his posts, but online, hey, let him be the BOSS in his own mind. I've been here a long time on and off. trolling is this guys game, unfortunately he only has one type of bait, and that's calling people that suffer the hardest negative and acting their superior, he must just copy and paste from years back, pretty lame.

 

[derpytia]

This isn't Fishbone. He sufferers and only wants to help. His message is one of being positive and physically active to better deal with T.

I'm sure his intent is to help. And if he's helped other people then great! I'm glad someone benefitted. But looking down on others who are not yet in the same place as he is or who don't find his message one that works for them is not good. It's good to want to get people fired up and in a more positive frame of mind. But when you go overboard and start getting harsh with people who are hurting badly and just want simple comfort and support it doesn't come off as supportive or helpful but rather insulting.

 

[Greg Sacramento]

My tinnitus is somewhat mild, and it's the constant, haunting thought of it getting worse that gets to me.

You should be fine, if you take care of yourself/health as needed by everyone as they get older. Just beware of the major do's and don't that are associated with tinnitus. Don't live your life in fear, but try not to expose yourself to loud noise or use unfriendly medications.

 

[Jazzer]

all tinnitus is caused by something physica

I absolutely believe this.
In my case severe noise trauma destroyed something in my ears.
Without that noise the nerve cells would still be healthy - but they were physically destroyed.