- Aug 14, 2013
- 2,455
- Tinnitus Since
- Resolved since 2016
- Cause of Tinnitus
- Unknown (medication, head injury)
@Markku I am doing okay this morning. I went to bed last night and slept for 12 hour straight. I woke up a few times with a splitting headache. I also woke up to a new sound. This has been happening since the ringing started. I can say that it has changed tone/pitch/volume every week. There are some moments when it is not there and some moments when it is all I hear. Today is a new sound that I have never heard before. Almost an electric sound. I still have the splitting headache. I am wondering if it is the side effect of stopping Celexa (even after 1 day). I go to a new ENT on Tuesday. I also made an appt. with a psychiatrist in a couple weeks. I don't know what will come of it but I am trying to be proactive.
I am still on the fence about work. I spoke (well cried) to my boss yesterday and she brought up the sick leave. I have about two weeks of vacation packed up and I might take that as well. There is a part of me that things the continual changing of sound means that something is happening. It seems that this condition is mysterious on all fronts. I have never had a high pitched sound in my ears (isn't that supposed to be noise induced). I also find that when I am nervous/anxious both of my ears start ringing. I rub them and they stop. It is a strange phenomenon. The other thing that I have to find is some noise that is perfect for my office. When I work with clients I cannot have distracting sound. For some reason, the acoustics sound strange in my office and any sound amplifies the ringing. When I walk out of my office it is a totally different experience.
I assume the first few months are the ones where we panic and try to run from the sounds. I have started to tell myself to focus on the outside noise. I have to remind myself all the time. I have many ups and downs it seems. I know one thing is for sure, my anxiety feeds into the ringing. I have always been an anxious person (since I was a little girl) and tend to fixate on things. I have gone back and forth for years about taking medication to help take the edge off. I have even talked about it with my boyfriend. Its funny because I have clients who are on medication for depression/anxiety/bipolar/schizophrenia and I find myself asking them objectively about their experience with meds. For some they say it is absolutely needed (schizophrenics take meds to reduce the chatter and bipolar take meds to stabilize their up and down moods).
I have almost equated our experience to that of schizophrenics. At first they are scared of the voices in their heads but they realize it is their brain making the voices. This video link I posted is an amazing TED talk about learning to live with schizophrenia and it makes me think of our situation as well.
Eleanor Longden: The voices in my head | Video on TED.com
I am going to get ready and take a walk in my favorite meadow. It manages to calm me down. I am still more on the side of running away from the sound but I assume over time our habituation is our brains way of accepting the noise. It is a crazy, frightening, courageous, daunting journey.
Thanks for the thoughts.
If I were you, I would insist on a proper (visual) inspection of your ears and eustachian tube when seeing your new ENT. You never know what you might find in there - even if the ENTs thinks everything is fine (I speak from experience). Do you feel equal pressure in your ears when doing the valsalva maneuver?
About your anxiety, I assume it is relatively mild given you are well functioning otherwise (and working in the health care industry). For mild anxiety, I can recommend hypnosis - with a good hypnotist, it will take it away more or less instantly (medication is crap). Again, I speak from experience.
Don't expect much from the psychiatrist. In fact, I (personally) wouldn't even bother. If you need meds, get them from your ENT next week.
Best of luck.