Why Do Some People Hate Bill Bauer?

[Michael Leigh]

If you believe it is right to be cautious,
@Bill Bauer is your man !!

Cautious certainly, paranoid and scaring the life out of a person no....

 

[john paul]

I think most people are here because they either ignored general advice about loud music or were in a little bubble of its fine it will be fine, and/or were let down by trusting doctors and medicines. The fact is that unless you wise up in every sense of the word your going to suffer for it. For those who had head injuries or born with some condition then thats different. There needs to be some serious education in my opinion, never look at the sun with binoculars, never eat yellow snow, like wise never go to a rock concert without ear plugs. If your already screwed unless you like being screwed for life and having to live with what ifs then you need to cancel out the noise to your ears for a long time. Ears are delicate they take a long time to heal so if you carry on as if there isn't going to be a problem because the places you go are not seemingly loud, then your going to find out the hard way that your ears disagree with you.

 

[jimH]

The title of this thread really does bother me. That's because the word "HATE" is in it.
Implying that a specific forum member is actually hated by numerous people.

As I write this, there are 85 members logged on and 819 guests. What impression does the title of this thread give to those that are here for the first or even second time?

Can the title be softened-up a bit? Such as "Why Do Some People Strongly Disagree With Bill Bauer."

 

[BuzzyBee]

Some people just don't like cats.

 

[BuzzyBee]

The title of this thread really does bother me. That's because the word "HATE" is in it.
Implying that a specific forum member is hated.

As I right this, there are 85 members logged on and 819 guests. What impression does the title of this thread give to those that are here for the first or even second time?

Can the title be softened-up a bit? Such as "Why Do Some People Strongly Disagree With Bill Bauer."

My thought too! Bill is such a good sport about it. It could easily be turned into a Why do People Love Bill Bauer thread or something else fun. Then again, the title got my attention...

@Bill Bauer I always enjoy what you have to say.

 

[Michael Leigh]

Can the title be softened-up a bit? Such as "Why Do Some People Strongly Disagree With Bill Bauer."

I agree with your comments. The author of this thread should have shown more sensitivity in the title and not use the word hate, for I'm sure Bill is not hated. He has always conducted himself with civility and shown respect, even when dealing with adversity from some members. Some of his advice is very good but he can be overzealous with it at times, which Fishbone and I have mentioned. He is doing a good job but just needs to rein things in a little.

Michael

 

[Alex F]

Oh boy. Factions... I forget sometimes that this happens on the internet...

Thanks Glynis for reminding all involved what this forum is here for... support for all...

As a newbie I have found this forum very useful in providing facts, warnings and general information.



Bill prefers safety and caution... I have to agree with him on this matter, one cannot after all underestimate the seriousness of this condition and despite how much we might want to go out and do things that we used to, they could cause us to get worse.


I miss headphones, I really do... music was and is still a huge part of my life. Every day I have to fight the urge to plug them in and listen to my music with headphones.


I am still "learning" a life "without headphones" and its most uncomfortable. I used to listen to them on the way to and from work, and most of the evening when I was at home, writing, on the internet etc... Its like missing a limb in some ways... I just have to get used to not using them and going back to speakers.


But this is what got me to where I am now. Therefore no matter how much I yearn for them, I refrain from doing so. I cannot just pretend that if I put my headphones on I will be all right because I won't, the hissing in my ear is proof of that.


That being said. Will all noise exposures make tinnitus worse? I don't think so. However it is sensible to take precautions. You don't want to be spending hours next to speakers or attending airshows anytime soon.


I think all should just remember that all here are individuals with their own tinnitus journeys. I suspect that each of us are more or less mentally prepared to give up things than others...


and sometimes mistakes will be made, costly ones. Getting tinnitus doesn't instantly make us "perfect" tinnitus sufferers, able to know instantly what we should and shouldn't do.


likewise, though I am like Bill and will always be on the side of caution... because I don't want this to get any worse if I can help it, not everyone is necessarily going to want to change their lives to such an extent. Bill clearly prefers solitude, I can sympathise with that to some extent but many others want to lead sociable lives.

Ultimately it is much easier for folk like Bill and myself to give up noisy events, parties etc if we've next to no inclination to attend them in the first place and seek quiet and solitude, rather than someone who wants to be out there living it up.

There is much wisdom in both, like everything in life it is YOUR decision what you do... just remember that YOU pay the potential cost.

There's another thread where Bill says he feels sorry for people that want girlfriends and states, (very crudely) that women are worthless.

Well obviously I can't agree with that but I can agree with Bill that "partners" are not a "necessity" in life...

it seems to me that many people cannot conceive of living a life without one, a kind of blank spot in their minds that cannot comprehend being "happy" without "other people" being the source of that happiness. Its one of those ingrained things that very few people can see themselves without long term and yet still being truly "happy."


full credit and support to anyone (most people really) who do value romantic relationships and who get great joy from them. They can be a great source of strength, especially if partners are loving and understanding and if that's what you live for, then great.

However I see no value in them for me, personally. I prefer solitude in my private life and in my own home, aside from work and friends and have no desire for a family of my own.

To each their own is what I think it comes down to

 

[Michael Leigh]

I miss headphones, I really do... music was and is still a huge part of my life. Every day I have to fight the urge to plug them in and listen to my music with headphones.

I am an Audiophile and used to listen to music through high-end headphones. Due to listening at too high a volume which I wasn't aware of I developed tinnitus. That was 22 years ago and haven't worn headphones since and don't miss them. Put the headphones away, sell them or just dispose of them for there is the possibility, they will make your tinnitus worse even at low volume if you are tempted to use them....

 

[Bill Bauer]

There's a thread were bill wished a permanent spike on a member so he would learn his lesson.

Sorry about your misunderstanding of my post. This also proves that you haven't read my messages in this thread as I had already talked about it in this thread. After a member wrote about him planning to do something reckless, I wrote that it would be good for him to get a permanent spike now - that way he would have something to remind him why it is not ok to do reckless things. With a reminder like that, he would likely stop being reckless and avoid even greater damage. The alternative (as I see it) is for him to NOT get any feedback from his body, and to continue damaging his body. The eventual/possible permanent spike as a result of THAT would be much more serious. So if he won't stop with the recklessness now, his best chance of avoiding The Serious Permanent spike is to get a moderate permanent spike now.

There's another thread where Bill says he feels sorry for people that want/have girlfriends and states, (very crudely) that women are worthless.

This was me chatting with others in a General forum. My post was about why I came to a conclusion that women are worthless to men and that men are worthless to women. You don't need other people to be happy. But I am not sure what any of this has to do with T.

This is the Bill Bauer that I know.

Wow, this is your version of "J'accuse...!" Cool.

You're taking things too literally dude.

No, I do mean everything that I say. I am not going to repeat my posts here, but in those posts I shared what had chrystallized in my mind after decades of intense thought.

Ok, I will quote one of those posts, to demonstrate that I don't dislike women, because I don't think there literally is any difference between women and men:

Around the time when I turned 40, I realized how ridiculous the whole setup is. I wouldn't want to be with a transsexual (a man who had a surgery and started taking hormones to look like a woman). But what is the difference between a transsexual and someone who was born female? I believe the answer is the time when they began being exposed to female hormones - one got them in the womb, and the other got them later on in life. I don't think it is such a big difference. I am not gay, so I wouldn't enjoy being with a transsexual, and that also means that I wouldn't enjoy being with another human who was born female (i.e., who is a man who had started receiving hormones a little earlier than that transsexual).

This habit of jacking yourself off with a female body is absolutely insane! It is so random, too. There are so many things you can use, why focus so much on a female body [that can ruin your physical health (i.e., venereal disease), as well as your financial health (i.e., alimony)]?

Free your mind!

 

[glynis]

@Alex F,
Thank you for your kind words
Love glynis

 

[Bill Bauer]

Bill prefers safety and caution... I have to agree with him on this matter, one cannot after all underestimate the seriousness of this condition and despite how much we might want to go out and do things that we used to, they could cause us to get worse.

I am being painted as a zealot, and yet all I am advocating is caution (possibly mostly during the first year or two). I agree with everything in your post. Thank you for summarizing your position that happens to coincide with my position.

 

[glynis]

@Bill Bauer ,
Keep your posts coming,
Don't be to disheartened with the title of the thread ,
Your well loved on here.
Love glynis x

 

[Bill Bauer]

This thread is making it personal

I honestly don't mind. I can see how my posts might appear to many people, and I can see why they think what they think.

Leading a life of social isolation

I had shared on this forum that I happen to not "go out". But surely one can avoid social isolation while still not attending concerts and avoiding loud pubs/bars. I had advocated caution and I had advocated avoiding concerts and loud pubs. I don't believe I ever advocated social isolation for others (as in said that it is the only way). All I might have said is that social isolation is a viable option.

 

[Bill Bauer]

What sounds one can tolerate or not is very specific per individual case and seeing as Bill hands out generalised advice left and right

Aren't you also handing out generalized advice? Your advice happens to be the opposite of mine, but it is still general and it certainly has the potential to harm people. (Would you like me to provide links to posts that provide support for the preceding sentence?)

 

[dpdx]

I think Bill has good points like staying away from doing stupid ear tests or avoiding loud sounds.

 

[Bill Bauer]

Bill's studies? Some sort of evidence?

You don't use Any studies to back up your posts.

Studies published in a peer reviewed journal and cited by other peer-reviewed sources, as well as by a dissertation that had been successfully defended at a major university (I imagine that dissertation was read not only by the author's dissertation supervisor, but by the external advisors; those are the people whose job is to ensure that the author does not cite questionable research) Are in fact evidence. We don't make our decisions based on the studies we Wish we had, we must make our decision based on the studies we actually have.

Bill's extreme views presented as assertions

It should be clear that whatever I am posting is just my opinion. Unlike you, I try to support these opinions by citing the posts of others and by citing published research. I am sure that the target audience knows exactly why I came to the conclusions that I came to. If they don't think the studies are valid, then they won't listen to me. That's fine with me.

Bill does give some decent advice but he also has flawd comments like "I am positive, you will hear silence again", "The first 4-8 weeks are the hardest for new tinnitus suffers", "Another small spike can give you a permanent spike " These are incorrect and new members believe it.

I just searched this forum for the words "I am positive, you will hear silence again" in my posts. I couldn't find anything. May I ask you to provide a link to a thread where I wrote this? I might have written that upon reading someone describing getting a mild hiss at onset (a stage that many here take a year to get to) and having it diminish drastically within a week or two (many here need to wait a long time after onset before noticing any improvement). In a case like that I honestly believe that this person would eventually get cured, and I shared this with them as a way to provide hope and encouragement to them.

The first 4-8 weeks are the hardest for new tinnitus suffers" This is something I Did write. This had been my experience. As a result, whenever the experience of others is similar, I notice it. I noticed this pattern countless number of times. Yes, if I were to write a paper to be published, I would qualify the above and write "most sufferers". If I were to spend a year looking over the text, I would add this too. What you are reading is me typing very fast. Not all of it is as polished as it could be.

Another small spike can give you a permanent spike
Above, I wrote that it is my belief that if one gets temporary spikes long enough, eventually one might get a spike that ends up being permanent.

 

[Bill Bauer]

@Bill Bauer ,
Keep your posts coming,
Don't be to disheartened with the title of the thread ,
Your well loved on here.

Thank you for your kind words, Glynis.

 

[fishbone]

You don't have Any studies. Studies published in a peer reviewed journal and cited by other peer-reviewed sources, as well as by a dissertation that had been successfully defended at a major university (I imagine that dissertation was read not only by the author's dissertation supervisor, but by the external advisors; those are the people whose job is to ensure that the author does not cite questionable research) Are in fact evidence. We don't make our decisions based on the studies we Wish we had, we must make our decision based on the studies we actually have.

It should be clear that whatever I am posting is just my opinion. Unlike you, I try to support these opinions by citing the posts of others and by citing published research. I am sure that the target audience knows exactly why I came to the conclusions that I came to. If they don't think the studies are valid, then they won't listen to me. That's fine with me.


I just searched this forum for the words "I am positive, you will hear silence again" in my posts. I couldn't find anything. May I ask you to provide a link to a thread where I wrote this? I might have written that upon reading someone describing getting a mild hiss at onset (a stage that many here take a year to get to) and having it diminish drastically within a week or two (many here need to wait a long time after onset before noticing any improvement). In a case like that I honestly believe that this person would eventually get cured, and I shared this with them as a way to provide hope and encouragement to them.

The first 4-8 weeks are the hardest for new tinnitus suffers" This is something I Did write. This had been my experience. As a result, whenever the experience of others is similar, I notice it. I noticed this pattern countless number of times. Yes, if I were to write a paper to be published, I would qualify the above and write "most sufferers". If I were to spend a year looking over the text, I would add this too. What you are reading is me typing very fast. Not all of it is as polished as it could be.

Another small spike can give you a permanent spike
Above, I wrote that it is my belief that if one gets temporary spikes long enough, eventually one might get a spike that ends up being permanent.

C'mon Bill, you post that people will hear silence again in a lot of your posts.... This is just false advice and NEEDS to be avoided. We have talked about this before and you still post such an advice to newcomers who are in pain and desparate. YOU cannot predict how tinnitus will re-act and telling people that their tinnitus will be silent, when you have NO clue is just horrible.

People are here on this forum, so maybe their tinnitus will fade and become silent again, but to sometimes lead them on and provide false promises is not helpful....

I on the other hand NEVER do this. I wish for people to have their tinnitus go away, but if it DOES NOT, then i just tell them that they can live with it and I share somethings that have helped me in my 30 years living with tinnitus. My information comes from experience and NOT reading posts on a forum....

 

[Sebastians]

Who is bill bauer?

 

[Bill Bauer]

you post that people will hear silence again in a lot of your posts

I never say that they will hear silence again. I write something along the lines of "T tends to fade over time (and even disappear) for many people." This is consistent with the research published in that Stats thread.

 

[Alex F]

This habit of jacking yourself off with a female body is absolutely insane! It is so random, too. There are so many things you can use, why focus so much on a female body [that can ruin your physical health (i.e., venereal disease), as well as your financial health (i.e., alimony)]?

Biology, dude.

Its literally ingrained in us (if we're attracted to women)

When you look at it logically I agree that there are many associated risks with sex and marriage etc, for all genders...

Its very few people however, who can actually mentally separate their desires from wanting to act on them and even fewer who would even think to actually do so as a life choice.

The notion of not pursuing relations is beyond most people's boggle point...

Its not a rational urge, reproduction isn't... people do it, just because its what our nature wants us to do. You can explain to some people the positives and negatives of all these things and they're still going to do them, for pleasure/babies...

We're in the realms of biological desires and feelings here, not logic and rationality... love isn't rational... still doesn't mean you HAVE to pursue it, however. I disagree with anyone who says that you can't help but "fall in love."

You can't help your feelings but you can choose to not act on them if you see the validity in not doing so, for whatever reason... and the older you get, the easier it becomes...

I don't think its insane, its "natural" its what we're programmed to do... I've just made the choice for myself not to pursue it, same as you have.

 

[fishbone]

I agree with your comments. The author of this thread should have shown more sensitivity in the title and not use the word hate, for I'm sure Bill is not hated. He has always conducted himself with civility and shown respect, even when dealing with adversity from some members. Some of his advice is very good but he can be overzealous with it at times, which Fishbone and I have mentioned. He is doing a good job but just needs to rein things in a little.

Michael

I don't hate Bill at all

I hate tinnitus, I just dislike some of his advice....

 

[Bill Bauer]

people do it, just because its what our nature wants us to do.

We learn to control all sort of urges. It makes sense to add one more urge to the list.

I've just made the choice for myself not to pursue it, same as you have.

I am at a stage where it Does seem bizarre to me. I enjoy being at this stage, and if you stay away from the insanity long enough you might get to this stage too.

 

[brownbear]

Blimey it's so hard to know who to root for when everyone is bonkers. I choose.............

 

[fishbone]

Ok Ok I have to confess something here....I like Glynis a lot

To have a gal be so cool and a Bad A$$ and was a jiu jitsu practioner. She even thinks we are the pure male/female versions of each other....you can't beat that folks

Ok...we shall resume our normal conversation about Mr. Bill.......

 

[Alex F]

We learn to control all sort of urges. It makes sense to add one more urge to the list.

Agreed. Again, age does play a factor in this, the older one gets, the weaker the sex drive generally tends to get. Try telling this to, for example a young man in his teens or 20s loaded with testosterone...

I am at a stage where it Does seem bizarre to me. I enjoy being at this stage, and if you stay away from the insanity long enough you might get to this stage too.

Oh I'm there already... it does seem bizarre to me, much of human nature is insane when you look at it with a detached perspective...

I just can't disagree with it as a concept nor invalidate it as relevant for others if that's what they want. Its kind of how we continue to exist as a species... If people weren't doing this, the world would be a lot quieter

 

[glynis]

@fishbone....hahaha smiling like a Cheshire Cat..... lol
Your a lovely person...love glynis

 

[glynis]

Again, age does play a factor in this, the older one gets, the weaker the sex drive generally tends to get.

Add on my asthma and an oxygen tank...why would I want the bells to ring !!!!
Seariously hahaha.... how old is to old....
Love glynis x

 

[Bill Bauer]

Key word, "case report"... These are published by doctors regarding patients that are under THEIR care, and I personally have never seen a case report used as a reference in anything I've read concerning medical treatments for tinnitus. Are you going to tell me now that you personally evaluated each one of these individuals, recommend a course of action, ensured that each was following the same treatment plan, monitored their progress and conducted a second evaluation after said treatment plan? No you just pieced together some forum posts.

Case reports are often based on just ONE case. As I had pointed out, we are getting countless reports. Quantity CAN act as a substitute for quality, when one does not have an option of getting quality.

The way I see it, T is so bad that a 1% chance of it getting louder is something worthy of trying to prevent. The sheer volume of people who report those experiences (and also the number of people who report protection of their ears made a positive difference for them), convince me that the risk of regretting knowingly exposing yourself to noise is likely above 1% (and might be higher for long term repeated exposure).

 

[Bill Bauer]

Bill, let's be honest, eveytime you argue with someone on this issue it is your detractor who has all the Agree mentions.

Good that you love it. I was more thinking about past discussions, you and Ed for example.

It is interesting how you focused on the fact that Ed got 5 "likes" for his initial post where he voiced his opinion about my opinions. I wish you were to read that thread and see the posts that I will quote below:

Yes, you are correct. Not only that, but I have experienced firsthand already how avoidance is so much more helpful. Yes, even using earplugs and earmuffs is not a suitable replacement for avoidance.

In the third or fourth week of November I bought earmuffs and started wearing them on the bus, which I would take daily for work. At some point earlier on in this month (December) there was a new bus driver who not only had the bus intercom system turned on, but had the volume incredibly loud. I wore my ear protection and kept shuffling seats in an attempt to not be near one of the speakers. I suppose I must have not seen one of the speakers and ended up getting blasted. Even with ear protection on, it made my tinnitus arguably at its worse and gave me a new tone. Ever since then, I have opted for ridesharing services despite how expensive they are. I have sworn off using the bus.

Now, to my amazement, and in less than a month, not only has my new tone vanished, but my tinnitus has gone from moderate to mild. It is amazing to think that just cutting out a 15 minute bus drive with ear protection could have such benefits.

We have to listen to our bodies. The first advice I got for my chronic pain, while he was a jerk about it, was a necessary part of dealing with pain.

"If it puts you in pain, don't do it."

I hated this advice. I hated it. I was mad, upset, and I refused to listen to it. But I broke because I am only human and I cannot endure the torture my body puts me through. A lot of what I learned from chronic pain seems to transfer over to tinnitus too.

One example is my own story, where I would follow @Ed209 advice before my tinnitus got worse, and @Bill Bauer s advice these days, when I get new sounds when someone talks to loudly close to my ears. You have to chose your own way, but if you notice that doorslams and dogs barking give permenent damage, not just an stressrelated spike, then I would suggest to follow @Bill Bauer s better safe than sorry-approach for a while, for me that kind of living is really bad for my depression, @Ed209 is spot on with that one, but worsening tinnitus is what made me depressed, so I can't take more risks at the moment. If my ears were stronger, I would try to test my luck a little bit more, but just a little bit, because I learned the hard way this is not the case at the moment, I need to adapt to a boring life or risk a worsening of my tinnitus, its the sad truth, its my new reality, and I hate it. I think its an extreme, my story will make new sufferers with mild tinnitus to hide from dogs and run away from kids, and that kind of being afraid of everything behaviour sucks the life out of you. So as long as your tinnitus not get worse by normal sounds, then why not live a good normal life? The problem is that a normal day can produce a 167db balloonpop, it was that kind of thing that made my tinnitus worse after 17 years of a protect when necessery-lifestyle. And now I am in @Bill Bauer land, and need to protect my ears to 70+DB sounds instead of 100+DB sounds.