Barry098

Barry098

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  • Barry098
    I wonder if there's a connection between antihistamines and decreased tinnitus.
    RunningMan
    Like with various other things, I've heard it both ways. I've taken different ones and don't think it affected tinnitus. Unfortunately, I can't even say I've even slept any better with them (Diphenhydramine/Benadryl, Doxylamine, Hydroxyzine HCL, Trazodone, Nortriptyline).
    Barry098
    T was pretty mellow today, probably 2 or 3 out of 10. I spent most of the day avoiding situations that would antagonize it…
    4Grace
    @Barry098 - your stories give me a bit of hope. How you go from screaming T to a 2 or 3. I am in a bad spiral. Worsening all the time. It's heartbreaking to think if it goes away as it did for you in 2017 in can come back. Always need to be careful. Thank you for sharing your stories. Stay away from my posts. I'm a disaster. :) I can't protect from noise.
    Barry098
    @4Grace you are in good company. I can't protect from noise either. My T fades with time and then I get complacent and mess myself up again…endless loop :(
    Barry098
    Ah…nothing like that T alarm bell first thing in the morning that grabs you by the throat and shouts "wake the F up!"
    Barry098
    T calmed down this evening to a livable level. I hope the torturer didn't just leave the room temporarily to go sharpen some more tools!
    Jammer
    In some odd way, I appreciate that my T is consistently horrific, as opposed to tricking me into thinking I'm getting better, to then only to return with a vengeance a day later.
    Barry098
    I've had long periods of horrific. I'll definitely take any breaks in can get at this point!
    Barry098
    Feeling some chest pain recently...I think that's a good sign that my problems with tinnitus might be resolved in the near future...right?
    streifzug
    absolutely!
    Barry098
    Seriously wonder how many years this condition has taken off our lives collectively…I bet when added up, T is in competition with cancer.
    Barry098
    The only way to live with T is to embrace it as if you chose it. Resistance is futile and only causes more pain.
    View previous comments…
    L along the way
    However, plenty of rest, shifting focus from my head to more whole body experience, and attention on breathing.. all helpful. Anything that promotes wellbeing is the thing.. i'd say... hope a good today.. and going day by day
    Barry098
    @L along the way
    All great advice. I especially like what you said about shifting from the head to the body. This is very true for me as well. And day by day is great but often times it's step by step for me. Just depends on how intense things get. I appreciate your thoughts thanks for sharing.
    L along the way
    @Barry098 likewise, and i feel too, that every small step towards more wellbeing is valuable. Thank you too & hope today may be a good day
    Barry098
    So fucking tired of this rollercoaster…I'm right back to where I was summer of 21 and winter of 17. What's the point?
    gameover
    @Barry098. So sorry. Especially that you did escape it (fully!) once. How cruel to be pulled back into hell again. And again.
    Barry098
    Thanks @gameover I might request that my handle be changed to Prometheus because it would better suit my experience! I'm fairly confident that this will resolve too…it's just that I'm tired of going down this road again and again. Wish I could just live in a bubble…
    Barry098
    Went to a wedding yesterday. I stayed outside the dance party the whole night and my ears are still ringing louder this morning. WTF?
    Barry098
    I wish I was completely deaf…I'm tired of sound
    View previous comments…
    Jammer
    Unfortunately, you'd then be deaf with tinnitus.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    If being deaf meant no T I would consider it. Unfortunately it's likely worse.
    Barry098
    @Jammer I don't mind the T as much as the reactivity to external sounds and the fact that I get injured so easily. I would love to be able to go places without fear of this getting worse all the time. @Tryn2BHopeful not sure it's really an option anyway but it's fun to contemplate
    Barry098
    Had a low T day. Not sure why but it was a welcome relief from the past few days where it was off the hook loud.
    View previous comments…
    Barry098
    Mine never used to be like this. It is a new stage for me I guess.
    Pixelito
    Barry does yours normally vary from quieter to loud?
    Barry098
    @Pixelito recently yes. This is new though. In the past I would injure them and they would scream for months and then slowly they would resolve. If I didn't injure them they would remain pretty stable. This recent injury caused them to fluctuate really wildly. It's pretty disconcerting actually because I don't know what to expect from one minute to the next.
    Barry098
    This tinnitus anxiety diet is really effective! I'm already back down to my high school weight!
    streifzug
    I am growing fat.
    Barry098
    @steifzug that just means you have a good stomach for stress and anxiety. I only gain weight when I'm relaxed.
    Barry098
    Starting to turn the tide with regard to controlling my reaction to T.
    streifzug
    You are strong! I mean it.
    RunningMan
    That's good if you can control your reaction. Mine is automatic going on 2+ years now. Haven't been able to control my reaction since before that, when it was still somewhat mild compared to these days.
    Barry098
    @streifzug I appreciate your kind words. I am getting better at not letting it utterly destroy me but I'm still struggling with this like everyone else here
    Barry098
    Slept with ear plugs last night. It was a smoother awakening experience. Didn't have the electric cattle prod to the spinal cord per usual.
    Barry098
    Earplugs make me feel warm a fuzzy. Wish I could just leave them in all the time…but I know the downside. Severe hyperacusis is lurking!
    4Grace
    That's a beautiful gift. You can use them when needed if they don't bother you. Opens up the world a little. How anyone puts them in with screaming T is beyond me.
    Barry098
    Yeah…makes no sense but, maybe it's because I always feel safe with them in.
    Barry098
    Yesterday was a really low T day! Only major change I made was eating a banana. T came back in full force in the middle if the night though
    View previous comments…
    ZFire
    Could Bananas be the key ?
    RunningMan
    I have an icy banana smoothie about every day to soothe stomach discomfort. I don't think it helps my tinnitus.
    Barry098
    @ZFire that thread is hilarious. Thanks for sharing. I had a few good laughs. I doubt the banana actually made a difference but I'll try it again tomorrow and report back. Today, no banana and screaming T, BTW
    Barry098
    Tinnitus is my whole body alarm clock. I don't even have to set an alarm anymore, I just jolt awake.
    View previous comments…
    Barry098
    @RunningMan and @Joshua Macleod thanks for your feedback. The hardest part of dealing with T for me is lack of good sleep. Yesterday was a surprisingly quiet T day (that has never happened to me so early on after an injury). Last night I really thought I would finally get a good nights sleep but it was waking me up all night. Very exhausting and frustrating.
    Joshua Macleod
    I can only speak for myself, and I genuinely hope this happens for you too, but my sleep is so much better now than a year ago. I do sometimes still struggle to get to sleep, but I suspect that's unrelated life stresses. That said, I've been in those situations where you just cannot get to sleep.
    RunningMan
    I can usually get to sleep initially ok, but an hour or two later, I'm usually waking up, and after a time or two of that, I can't get back to sleep without zolpidem. I had some sleep improvement in the first few months of severe tinnitus when I sometimes got no sleep, but sleep is consistently poor still - 5 hr average broken sleep maybe.
    Barry098
    Does it make anyone else anxious to listen directly to your T? To me it kind of feels like looking the devil right in the eyes…
    View previous comments…
    Barry098
    @gameover i totally understand where you are. It draws all kinds of emotions out of you. I've dealt with this so long now though that I've entered this familiarity stage where it almost feels like an annoying relative that comes to visit. Or maybe I just have Stockholm syndrome at this point because I don't feel anger anymore.
    crescentsky
    yeah at times if there is like a new tone or sound or new volume. I would say about 20% anxiety and 80% misery + hopelessness. Fam & friends also adds to the anxiety, esp when they are demanding or questioning my life decisions.
    Barry098
    @crescentsky that sounds like my story for many years. This recent time though, it's weird but I have no anger, self pity or resentment about this. I think, I've pretty much made peace with this condition…so I only have the 20% anxiety that you describe…
    Barry098
    I have an amazing ability to forget how bad screaming tinnitus is once my ears calm down. Don't want to make this mistake again…
    Barry098
    Damn this lizard brain and its automatic fear reflex! Once I'm awake I can control my reaction but waking up in terror each morning sucks!
    streifzug
    I think mornings are also the worst for me!
    RunningMan
    Same here. Anxiety is worst in the morning a while after waking while still in bed. Sometimes it gets better quickly after getting up, and sometimes it's a slow improvement through the day. Late evening is almost always best.
    Barry098
    @RunningMan sounds like where I was prior to this recent injury. Mornings could be a little rough but calmed down throughout the day. Now it is rough in the morning and progressively worse throughout the day. By this time at night T is absolutely screaming!
    Barry098
    Looks like I am going to have to buckle in for a bumpy ride. Good news is I needed to lose some weight anyway so back to the distress diet.
    Barry098
    40 minute Epsom Salt bath sure helped relax the nervous system and bring down my blood pressure. T lowered to bearable for little while.
    SharonBell
    Barry098 When I found out I had Tinnitus I was devastated, the noise was so debilitating, my anxiety was so bad I lost 30 some pounds in less than 3 weeks. I have gained 5 pounds back , maybe a little more now need to weigh myself.
    Barry098
    Choppy sleep last night, and intense distress upon waking this morning…back in tinnitus hell!
    View previous comments…
    MatthewR
    Barry you made me really happy with this comment <3
    Barry098
    @MatthewR I'm glad I could cheer you up. I've been on this forum for a long time because I am constantly pushing my ears to their breaking point. But I've noticed that most people come in super panicky but eventually they lose interest because their tinnitus drifts into the background and they move on with their lives.
    Barry098
    @MatthewR not saying it is an easy road to recovery but for me it is unfortunately a very familiar one!
    Barry098
    Tinnitus is louder than ever tonight…and so the rollercoaster begins again!
    View previous comments…
    BellaMia
    @MatthewR Sometimes it is and sometimes not. People can have it for years and it goes away. It's really just luck.
    MatthewR
    But how can I ever hope on better days if I have permanent hearing loss?? I don't want to be living like this anymore I'm depressed
    Barry098
    @BellaMia sorry to hear about that accident. Mine was once again my own fault. Music rehearsal that was apparently too loud for my glass ears (even though it never registered more than 74db). It's rough because music is my livelihood so other than going on disability, or changing careers, this will always be a danger for me :(
    Barry098
    Deep down inside, I must truly love my tinnitus. Otherwise, why would I continue placing myself in situations that make it worse!
    Barry098
    T was pretty much non existent for the last 2 months and then some very low volume electric guitar playing (65db) brought it screaming back…
    BrOKeN_1
    Fingers crossed it fades away agian for you.
    gameover
    You have some a rare ability to erase your T, but seems your sound tolerance is gone.
    Barry098
    @gameover yeah…it is weird, but it seems to fade with time but any little sound exposure and I am right back in hot water. Kind of hard for me to avoid sound though as I am a music teacher!
    Barry098
    Yesterday T=8/10, today woke up after a loud party and excessive drinking to almost non-existent T which stayed throughout the entire day!
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