Juliane

Juliane

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  • Juliane
    All I want is for my tinnitus to go away. It's ALL I care about. Since that is not possible why even bother with anything else
    Tryn2BHopeful
    I know the feeling. I dont want it to be all I care about. There are so many other things I want to care about. It feels impossible to shift my focus for any amount of time.
    S
    I would take my old T level back in an instant! Don't even want silence at this point just something way more manageable that doesn't turn my stomach at the mere sound and actions of it.
    Juliane
    This condition makes me feel like my soul is freezing. If there is no after-life and this is what we have to deal with I feel so cheated...
    crescentsky
    I think after this tinnitus experience, I don't ever want to be human again lol. I feel so traumatized. I think about this sometimes and it terrifies that if there is after-life, that this sound will continue to haunt me.
    Juliane
    Juliane
    Anyone else feeling our world is in a really dark place in general or is T making me think so?
    Juliane
    So tired of having to explain to friends why meeting up in larger groups is problematic for me. Honestly they can just f... off
    Juliane
    I think us T and H sufferers are just too sensitive and fragile for this mad and stupid noisy world. I am not built for that shite
    Juliane
    Will self-isolate and hibernate until spring. I'll be a bear.
    GG_Ear
    I'm just praying for improvement by Christmas, so I can be with family.
    Juliane
    2/2 3-4 hours. Now spiking. Bad decision apparently. Back to being recluse for at least the next 6-7 months. Then I reevaluate.
    GG_Ear
    I met two friends yesterday evening...although I partly enjoyed myself, today my ear is aching... Such a hard new reality to accept.
    Juliane
    1/2 Accepted invitation to meet with friends for the first time in months to be less of a recluse. Five people around a table talking for
    4Grace
    I could be wrong but sometimes I think it's our determination not to make it worse that makes things worse.
    Juliane
    GG_Ear
    Hi Juliane, how is your hyperacusis nowadays? P.s. I like your profile picture. Frida Kahlo suffered a lot in her life to health issues. She was a strong woman.
    Juliane
    Hi there. Thanks a lot. I like Frida Kahlo as well and did way before my suffering intensified. I am not as strong as her but she is a great inspiration!
    GG_Ear
    @Juliane Yes I studied art history in college and always admired her work. I also liked the film that was made about her starring Selma Hayek :) ... I hope your suffering ends or lessens with time. The only constant is change.
    Juliane
    @GG_Ear Thank you so much for your kind words
    4Grace
    @Juliane - Hey Juliane. I have been thinking of you. How have you been doing? Has going part time at work helped?
    View previous comments…
    4Grace
    @Juliane - Thank you. I think it is worsening due to massive stress. Had to move out temporarily. Family is not happy due to believing I am not strong enough. Plus I stay in a some what noisy environment all day. I have been isolating but talking to a lot of people. I am great full for not being on the meds at this moment.
    4Grace
    Meds remove all emotions so they help but then I panic for being on them. Fear they will make things worse in the long run.
    Juliane
    @4Grace I am truly sorry to hear you are suffering so much. I am in a very dark place too atm.
    Juliane
    View previous comments…
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Honestly loud doesn't really bother me to much anymore that I can tell. Not that I go to concerts or anything. Mostly loud parents at football games. What gets me are fans sometimes, roadnoise and any other broadband sound. Silence can cause the low hum to kick in... so I can't win
    4Grace
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @4Grace Sorry I missed this. No I rarely wear ear plugs. I wear them to mow the grass, and if I go to an event that gets unusually loud. I keep them with me just in case.
    Juliane
    I want a castle in a quiet forest. Furniture there will be soft, cutlery made of velvet. The swimming pool open only to people w H and T
    Juliane
    If stress and emotional trauma (in addition to noise) are linked to our T, could we become better if we became happier?
    View previous comments…
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @Juliane it was just 2 10mg doses of escitalopram when it started. I took a third thinking it was temporary and then stopped. T ever since. No history of hearing issues or T. My audiogram is actually fine, but I know thats possible even with hearing loss.
    Juliane
    @Tryn2BHopeful That is so horrible. So so sorry. Doctors should be penalized for not warning people about side effects
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @Juliane shit happens... the "doctor" didn't know either. I quote doctor because seeing an actual doctor is near impossible. I saw a Nurse Practitioner who prescribed the meds that potentially changed my life. I could of questioned it but at the time I trusted them and thought it was the path to getting better. I guess I was wrong
    Juliane
    "There is a higher prevalence of tinnitus in individuals with post-traumatic stress disorder than in those working in noisy environments"
    GG_Ear
    This is very interesting. I definitely have had longterm stressful and anxious experiences in life.
    Juliane
    4/4 depressed. I simply don't know what to do. Not working is not an option long term and I am not wealthy
    4Grace
    So sorry you/we are going through this hell. Just keep hope that some day things will get better.
    Juliane
    3/4 unemployment be any better? I was on sick leave years ago due to T and I have no idea if it made me better, but it def made me more
    Jupiterman
    It depends on the amount of noise at work.

    Is your work noisy?

    Some people have no choice and can't work because their tinnitus is so severe.

    You should take some comfort in that you are able to work.
    Juliane
    @Jupiterman I would not call it noisy but online meetings and work obligations such as conferences and travelling make my tinnitus worse. I simply cannot do these things anymore. But online meetings are difficult to avoid...
    Juliane
    Yes I do take comfort in the fact that I am able to work still, believe me. But with that comes the fear that things can always get worse with a condition like T..
    Juliane
    2/4 Working too much makes me worse. It really is a balance. But if my friend is right and I should not be working, will sick leave or
    Juliane
    1/4 My good friend keeps telling me I should not be working at all with this level of T torture. But working a bit has a positive impact
    4Grace
    We just need to be careful. Not working can cause addition anxiety, stress and depression which is not good for T. We have to choose our hard. However, I so understand your situation.
    Juliane
    I hope relatives are there to welcome us when we pass.... I miss my grandmother so much and hope that she will be there to meet me
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