PennyCat

PennyCat

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  • PennyCat
    My normal T has been much more in my focus again lately and bothering me/making me anxious. Not sure why :(
    Mo8409
    Maybe it's the anxiety? Anxiety can make everything 10 times worse! I'm a nervous person too. Trying to control it better. I hope things start to look up for you
    SarahMLFlemmer
    Cause it's never ending. Keep hangin' on, one day at a time.
    PennyCat
    Update: I finish my anxiety program on Monday. TTTS comes and goes. Pulsatile T still bad. Normal T still bothers me sometimes. I am anxious
    Ryan Scott
    What program?
    PennyCat
    @Ryan Scott A local program I've been doing since late April. The model they use is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), so if you're looking for something similar near you, you could look into that :)
    PennyCat
    Psych prescribed Buspar which I've taken before (pre-T) w no issues… but saw someone on here who got T from it, & now I'm scared to take it
    PennyCat
    Didn't post for it, but earlier this month was 6 months of T. Everything has pretty much just progressively gotten worse instead of better.
    PennyCat
    Crackling and bubbling occurring in PT ear. Probably exacerbating the PT, but not much I can do for it… I already use Flonase :/
    PennyCat
    I really don't think I can go on anymore. I can't live like this and I don't want to. So many ear symptoms. Unbearable.
    PennyCat
    My anxiety is bad today. TTTS and PT really putting me through the wringer right now. Really hope they settle down. I want to feel okay
    SamRosemary
    The ttts seems to come and go. The good thing is the anxiety and panic because of it gets less and less as time goes on.
    obnoxious
    For a couple of months I was able to trigger TTTS episodes by _burping_. They would last _an entire fucking day_, independent muscle twitching without any sound trigger.
    S
    I've had ttts in my left ear for aslong as I can remember when certain sounds happen. I assumed it was normal with noise. Doesn't bother me anymore. You'll get there @PennyCat :)
    PennyCat
    My TTTS being back is really upsetting me. I hope it settles again. It's hard not to get anxious about it and catastrophize.
    Mo8409
    Easier said then done! Don't let the anxiety get to you! Anxiety makes everything worse. *Hugs*
    PennyCat
    Hi everyone
    View previous comments…
    tpj
    I read about Penny. Poor thing! Glad she's ok. And I'm proud of you. You had to wait there a long time. Hope it wasn't too bad for you.
    SarahMLFlemmer
    Hi there. <3 hope you're hanging in there okay.
    PennyCat
    @tpj Thank you! Yeah, it was pretty rough for a variety of reasons.
    @SarahMLFlemmer Thanks, I'm struggling a bit again with my TTTS but I hope it passes. Hope you're hanging in there too!
    @Joe Cuber Hello hello, Joe :)
    PennyCat
    My TTTS had been minimal or pretty much gone for a month or so, but it seems to be back today. Hope it goes away again :/
    View previous comments…
    RunningMan
    I had this happen on one occasion back in Feb/Mar 2022 when one of my co-workers to my left would speak to a group of us in a room, my left ear fluttered. Maybe 20 minutes before I left. Never happened again until yesterday, over 1 yr later, and it happened while listening to a podcast here but not until I had been listening for quite a while. Same thing - speaking on padcast made left ear flutter. Weird.
    RunningMan
    I don't normally sit and listen to podcasts at my computer, so that was unusual. No unusual noise exposure or unusual earplug use. My anxiety and depression levels are up recently, though - maybe a factor.
    PennyCat
    @RunningMan Mine seems to come and go. I know that anxiety and TTTS are closely associated, and for me I think it's probably the cause or a huge contributor. So that may be the case for you too. I know other people develop it from ear trauma though, but stress can definitely exacerbate it.
    PennyCat
    This pulsatile T is making me absolutely miserable. I cannot sleep at all. Starting to think it's not going to settle back down. Fuck life
    View previous comments…
    tpj
    @PennyCat, are you still taking Zoloft? If so, I would be cautious about using these drugs together. Perhaps you could talk to your doctor about it first.
    RunningMan
    @sakrt That's true about dementia, even the over the counter ones, not sure about the newer DORA sleep meds. ADs can do the same. Of course, lack of sleep is associated with dementia also.
    PennyCat
    @tpj I am. An old psych prescribed it while I was on ADs in the past, and my new psych also mentioned prescribing it to me, but at the time I hesitated because of my past experience with it making me sick. So I'm pretty sure it's safe to take on top of most ADs. But I'll definitely bring it up at my next appointment
    PennyCat
    So I need an MRA/MRV for my pulsatile T but I'm scared it'll make my normal T, TTTS, and H worse :/
    View previous comments…
    PennyCat
    @Damocles No, at least not that I've experienced. But I'm worried the loudness of the scans will, especially with how sensitive my ears are and with TTTS. But I don't even have scans scheduled so I'm worrying over a hypothetical scenario at this point
    Damocles
    Damocles
    Of course avoiding scans like these is the best thing a tinnitus sufferer (of any type/severity) can do, if possible.

    Maybe give it to the end of the year and see if things don't improve by themselves(?).
    PennyCat
    PT ear has been feeling full, and today there's a wet crackling sound when I press around it. Fluid in ear? Maybe from TMJ?
    PennyCat
    I already do Flonase every day & take Zyrtec, so not sure what else I can do for that
    makeyourownluck
    Not sure to be honest @PennyCat, but resist the urge to keep popping your ears (if your doing that at all)
    PennyCat
    I sound like a broken record, but I really can't do this
    View previous comments…
    PennyCat
    @makeyourownluck Thanks :,) If I'm not mistaken, do you also have pulsatile T, or did at one point? How do you cope??
    makeyourownluck
    Yeah still got it, right ear, I manage ok but it impacts me more than my regular T now since it's variable.

    In terms of coping, I was a hot mess for months, then I just veey slowly got used to it. Still shit, and always will be, but it doesn't impact my life too badly anymore.
    makeyourownluck
    Hope that helps
    PennyCat
    I'm really starting to believe that the T, pulsatile T, and TTTS are going to push me to the edge and then… :/ I'm so scared
    TheCapybara
    As someone that dealt with these thoughts and anxiety long before T became an issue, it's really important to try and keep busy/distracted with things you like to do to not fixate on it and get through the bad days. Take it easy Penny, you're going to be okay.
    PennyCat
    Finally got the courage to increase my Zoloft dose today. Hopefully it doesn't make my tinnitus worse. But if it does, I can re-adjust dose
    PennyCat
    Still struggling and freaking out about my pulsatile T. I hope it settles back to how it used to be soon. I can't live like this
    PennyCat
    I really don't think I can do this, everyone… I'm not sleeping no matter what I try to do. I'm in hell. I can't do this.
    View previous comments…
    TheCapybara
    Sorry to hear you're struggling lately Penny, did it suddenly just get worse without anything affecting it? As for sleep, melatonin and chamomile tea might help a bit. I have the latter every night before bed.
    PennyCat
    @TheCapybara Yep, got worse out of nowhere, I can't pinpoint any reason. I've had one or two periods of time where it's gotten worse and eventually reset, so that's my hope, but the uncertainty is scary. I take melatonin, hydroxyzine, and magnesium every night but still struggling w/ sleep
    Sammy0225
    @PennyCat from my personal experience hydroxzyine was spiking the shit out of mine @PennyCat
    PennyCat
    Back to crying and anxiety attacks :,)
    PennyCat
    My anxiety is so dumb. I hate how easy it is to convince myself that it'll never be okay, that it'll only get worse, and that I'll have no choice other than death because I won't be able to handle the suffering.
    Nadia231
    @PennyCat that's exactly how I feel every day. You couldn't have described it better. The hopelessness and anxiety are just exhausting
    SarahMLFlemmer
    @PennyCat it's gotta get better, it just has to.
    PennyCat
    My brain always finds something to hyperfixate on/worry about, whether it's my T, pulsatile T, TTTS, or all 3. Give me a break please, brain
    H
    Sounds like your cliche GAD to me, believe it or not this time next year I doubt you'll be focusing on either of those things
    PennyCat
    Random increase in my anxiety right now. Making it hard to deal with everything. Trying my best to calm down
    Damocles
    Unlike tinnitus, anxiety is all in the mind and can't affect you unless you let it. Keep reminding yourself of that.
    Damocles
    and give my love to THE Penny Cat, also. ♥
    PennyCat
    @Joe Cuber Thanks Joe, I had been doing a little better with my anxiety but I know it's often an up and down journey, much like tinnitus.

    @Damocles Thank you :) and will do!
    PennyCat
    Gonna increase my Zoloft dose, hopefully it goes okay. I wish the TTTS would fully go away, that's where a large chunk of my anxiety is from
    PennyCat
    Hi everyone. Been keeping busy w/ IOP, spending time outside, & reading. They are suggesting an additional 2 wks of IOP for me, so 8 wks now
    View previous comments…
    PennyCat
    Thanks @Joe Cuber :) I have felt a bit less anxiety over the past few days, it's hard to tell whether that's due to being in the IOP, taking Zoloft, time passing, or a combo of all 3. I think I'll end up doing the 8 weeks of treatment if that's what they think is best for me
    RainbowCat
    Nice to see this ☺️ What are you reading lately? Reading is also one of my main hobbies.
    PennyCat
    @RainbowCat I just finished the book I was reading last night - it's called The Perfect Stranger by Megan Miranda. It was great, I highly recommend if you like mystery/thrillers. I rated it 5 stars on Goodreads. I'm in the process of reading all of her books, 2 down so far :)
    PennyCat
    Yesterday was 5 months since onset & 4 weeks since worsening. Upsetting, but I know I'm still relatively early on.
    H
    I didn't know you were only 5 months into onset! I'd be very hesitant to call what you have worsening or a spike. Just the natural progression of tinnitus in the early stages. I'd be very confident to see improvements 6-12 months down the line @PennyCat :)
    PennyCat
    Thanks @Hardwell, that gives me some reassurance :)
    PennyCat
    PennyCat
    Wish I knew how I ended up w/ multitonal tinnitus, hyperacusis, & TTTS at the age of 22 w/ no acoustic trauma or hearing loss. I'm confused
    PennyCat
    Have barely eaten/drank since it got worse. I have Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, & today I stood up then immediately fainted :(
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