Chit Chat and All That...

[aura]

You truly are a sick individual and now the truth shall come out in the continuation of this saga. I can add that @aura will gladly help me with this version. Sit back and enjoy the ride.

What else could I do besides carrying that bag of toys around like it is fkn Christmas?

But yes, I agree with you on the sick part.

 

[Exit]

As long as I'm the top, I could swing both ways...

Most gay men I know my age used to be straight

Got 2-4 lovely kids and then swapped the dreadful complaining wife with a young muscular hunk

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

What else could I do besides carrying that bag of toys around like it is fkn Christmas?

But yes, I agree with you on the sick part.

Well if you would so kindly jump in and show the folks just how gay @Exit is after his fun in Spain, we then can have some kinky fun with the disguised walker.

 

[Exit]

Well if you would so kindly jump in and show the folks just how gay @Exit is after his fun in Spain, we then can have some kinky fun with the disguised walker.

Go ahead @aura!

I believe there is something going on you haven't told us yet...?

What do you think @Wrfortiscue?

Is she your wife's massage therapist...? Is that why the lovely wife is napping all the time instead of playing with your toys?

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

Go ahead @aura!

I believe there is something going on you haven't told us yet...?

What do you think @Wrfortiscue?

Is she your wife's massage therapist...? Is that why the lovely wife is napping all the time instead of playing with your toys?

@aura pay no attention to him. He's only trying to get you alone and have his kinky ways with you.

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

So thirty minutes of giving Dr. @Exit a good time and the cleaning lady removing her glowing objects, the good Doctor has now gone over to the straight side, asking the baked goods lady if she would add more whipping cream and licking it all off just for his damn pleasure. But no they were finished with this one. He's not that well endowed and they want a new victim. Miss Stephens replied to the young ladies question as "was that much excitement for you ladies?"

"No it was like playing with Ken Barbies boyfriend, no action at all."

The baked goods lady @Shera said, "I thought we were going to have fun with this one, but he was like a Swiss clock, same movement over and over."

The cleaning lady after putting her toys back on the walker replied, "he sure wasn't like the first time we got him, my guess is that gay hotel in Spain ruined him, you're right like a Swiss clock he was."

Well on they go, stopping for lunch at the new cafe, owned by a big handsome lad. On the front of the cafe the sign reads, "@Damocles Fine Burgers"

As they sat and ordered food, @aura said to the other three, "I don't think this time around there's much excitement, seems we have worn this bunch out, I'm retiring, think I will sell my walker, and take up surfing in the nude."

Miss Stephens looks around the table at the friends and stares at the cleaning lady, "damn @aura, I think you may be onto something at the beach nude, we should all go, who knows what we might find."

Our baked goods lady doesn't know beaches and nothing of riding a board out on the surf so she says, "no fucking way, I'm not going, I thought we were on a mission to straighten these straight gay boys out. I can't leave my shop."

And on it went, the others all agreed to the beaches and new horizons.

 

[Exit]

Just realised these soft porn stories are all I live for now

Thank you <3

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

Just realised these soft porn stories are all I live for now

Thank you <3

Sick, sick lad. Why not try surfing not nude, though might scare the dolphins.

 

[aura]

Just realised these soft porn stories are all I live for now

Thank you <3

Well I'm not a motivational guru, but I think the aim is to keep your mind and your body busy.

Señor @Elmer B Fuddled is doing a great job entertaining us (I think his short stories are my new guilty pleasure ) so he's a keeper on the forum.

The next step is finding something else besides this funny stuff that makes you feel that life is worth living.

 

[Exit]

Sick, sick lad. Why not try surfing not nude, though might scare the dolphins.

I tried it ten years ago... Dolphins were super friendly and cuddly

One, her name was Dolphina, even ripped apart my wet suit and started making loud tinnitus sounds...

 

[Exit]

Señor @Elmer B Fuddled is doing a great job entertaining us (I think his short stories are my new guilty pleasure ) so he's a keeper on the forum.

@Elmer B Fuddled is great!
Next step must be getting STD
Oh and I think he's a watcher like @Wrfortiscue!

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

@Elmer B Fuddled is great!
Next step must be getting STD
Oh and I think he's a watcher like @Wrfortiscue!

I'm only writing this crap because it's entertainment for those who get to take mind off the effin tinnitus. And the ringing in my ear right now is unbearable. It's the only thing now to keep my mind off the shite.

 

[Exit]

Yeah I start to see the point of big-group sex

If your life is shitty enough, group sex will distract you and the thoughts of STDs distracts you maybe a whole year

So one group sex a year will be just as effective as TRT if not better...

@Elmer B Fuddled, was the timber story true?
Are you here because of loud jobs in the woods...?

Do you have hyperacusis as well?

 

[aura]

"@Damocles Fine Burgers"

You nailed it!!

 

[Steph1710]

Hi @Exit

In answer to your question, no, I don't have anyone drilling in my head. But I do have someone banging a drum 24/7 - I have pulsatile tinnitus as well as normal tinnitus. Fun times!

I'm sorry I haven't been very active on here. I miss speaking to you all. <3 I am so overwhelmed with work commitments. And recently I've been writing an independent paper on 'Architectural Responses in Britain to Continental Modernism'.
It is taking up so much time - that and the community engagement project I am independently running at work.

I really need some time out for myself.

Anyway, I hope you're okay, and you haven't killed your neighbours yet?

Much Love x x x

 

[Steph1710]

This sounds like such an amazing job! I love Museum's and I'm obsessed with how the exhibits are designed!

Hi @Shera!

Sorry I never replied. I have been sooo busy in and out of work.

The job is amazing, but unfortunately some of the people I work with are a pain in the butt.

Exhibition design wasn't something I had ever considered. I got into it by accident really.

We're currently putting on an exhibition with the V&A museum, which should be fun!

Overall, it's the perfect job if you have tinnitus, as galleries and museums are mostly quiet. And because I work behind the scenes, it's even quieter when I'm there.

Do you have any favourite exhibitions that you've been to?

 

[aot]

I've been writing an independent paper on 'Architectural Responses in Britain to Continental Modernism'.

Post it once it's finished!

 

[Steph1710]

Post it once it's finished!

I would love to, but as it's something I am hoping to have published, I can't. Plus, does anyone really want to read it @aot Unless you're into that sort of thing, I can imagine it would be a pretty dry read haha.

But I appreciate your enthusiasm

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

Yeah I start to see the point of big-group sex

If your life is shitty enough, group sex will distract you and the thoughts of STDs distracts you maybe a whole year

So one group sex a year will be just as effective as TRT if not better...

@Elmer B Fuddled, was the timber story true?
Are you here because of loud jobs in the woods...?

Do you have hyperacusis as well?

Yes, the woods story is true --- over 30 years of sawing timber. My tinnitus isn't from saws, it was caused by ear infection. I left the woods after an accident where a small tree had hung up in a big tree. I fell and unbeknownst to me, it snapped back hitting me in the chest, breaking two ribs, and the sudden impact caused me to squeeze the trigger on the saw which made it take off at full throttle and I lost control of it, then it hit my leg and tore my leg wide open to the sewing of over 150 stitches to put me back together.

I retired after that, but went into building log homes.

 

[Shera]

The job is amazing, but unfortunately some of the people I work with are a pain in the butt.

Ah, the sad truth of too many jobs. However. I'm working as a librarian right now and so far I love everyone!

Sorry I never replied. I have been sooo busy in and out of work.

No worries! I know how it can be. I work 9 hour shifts so I feel so tired at the end of the day and I'm really trying to cram in all the stuff I need to do before!

Do you have any favourite exhibitions that you've been to?

There are so many I've loved! The best one I ever saw was an exhibit on the Titanic. It was incredible and you could tell whoever designed it LOVED what they were doing and the subject. There was a part where you actually went into a sinking Titanic.

The worse one was about poisons packed full of information and I loved it! But I remember how terribly boring it was and it hit me how they could have done themes with Alice in Wonderland, royals killing each other and so on to make it more entertaining for kids and adults. Because not everyone loves to read all that info! I mean I could have just read a book about poisons and it would have been more worth my money!

Unless you're into that sort of thing, I can imagine it would be a pretty dry read haha.

I'd read it.

 

[Shera]

Yes, the woods story is true --- over 30 years of sawing timber. My tinnitus isn't from saws, it was caused by ear infection. I left the woods after an accident where a small tree had hung up in a big tree. I fell and unbeknownst to me, it snapped back hitting me in the chest, breaking two ribs, and the sudden impact caused me to squeeze the trigger on the saw which made it take off at full throttle and I lost control of it, then it hit my leg and tore my leg wide open to the sewing of over 150 stitches to put me back together.

I retired after that, but went into building log homes.

Wowza! See that's why I hate sawing big trees! I always think it's gonna grab and take a body part out. I prefer someone else to fell the tree, saw it up and I'll do the rest. *shivers* I hope you're leg feels okay now.

 

[Exit]

Yes, the woods story is true --- over 30 years of sawing timber. My tinnitus isn't from saws, it was caused by ear infection. I left the woods after an accident where a small tree had hung up in a big tree. I fell and unbeknownst to me, it snapped back hitting me in the chest, breaking two ribs, and the sudden impact caused me to squeeze the trigger on the saw which made it take off at full throttle and I lost control of it, then it hit my leg and tore my leg wide open to the sewing of over 150 stitches to put me back together.

I retired after that, but went into building log homes.

I have to ask again...

True...?

Sounds just like one of your sick stories?

 

[Shera]

asking the baked goods lady if she would add more whipping cream and licking it all off just for his damn pleasure.

The baked goods lady @Shera said, "I thought we were going to have fun with this one, but he was like a Swiss clock, same movement over and over

Our baked goods lady doesn't know beaches and nothing of riding a board out on the surf so she says, "no fucking way, I'm not going, I thought we were on a mission to straighten these straight gay boys out. I can't leave my shop."

Well done @Elmer B Fuddled.
That last bit does sound like me! Ha-ha!!!

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

I have to ask again...

True...?

Sounds just like one of your sick stories?

Why would I make that up?

 

[Exit]

Hi @Exit

Anyway, I hope you're okay, and you haven't killed your neighbours yet?

They're all on my bucket list!

Hi @Exit

I really need some time out for myself.

Always the same with you girls...

Hi @Exit


Much Love x x x

Yeah yeah...

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

Wowza! See that's why I hate sawing big trees! I always think it's gonna grab and take a body part out. I prefer someone else to fell the tree, saw it up and I'll do the rest. *shivers* I hope you're leg feels okay now.

That happened years back. I still walk quite well although the knee joint flares up once in a bit, but hell I'm 73 years young. Not many my age have trekked across Spain 3 times.

 

[Exit]

Why would I make that up?

Sounded a little surreal...

So to summarise:

A tree fell on you.
The saw going nuts on your foot.

Then an ear infection fucks your otherwise nice retirement situation...?

Awful...

Is your health okay otherwise after all those years working and the accident? Hope so.

 

[Shera]

That happened years back. I still walk quite well although the knee joint flares up once in a bit, but hell I'm 73 years young. Not many my age have trekked across Spain 3 times.

I'd say!!! Wow. Go you!!! I want to do more treks.

I respect all chainsaws. Despite being careful my dad and I have had some close calls. It's that issue that no matter the safety features when you get surprised it's just instinct to grip harder. I loath it when the saw jumps at me. *shivers* Especially when I'm over 20 feet up in the air on a later sawing a stupid limb in the backyard!

Anywho. I know we probably never had adventures/close calls like yours. We were just cutting wood for our stove to keep warm. And tree maintenance in the yard.

 

[Elmer B Fuddled]

Sounded a little surreal...

So to summarise:

A tree fell on you.
The saw going nuts on your foot.

Then an ear infection fucks your otherwise nice retirement situation...?

Awful...

Is your health okay otherwise after all those years working and the accident? Hope so.

The saw came down across my thigh. As for health, a heart attack 2 years back, but it didn't kill me. I still push the mower saw firewood and walk every day.

 

[Steph1710]

Yes, the woods story is true --- over 30 years of sawing timber. My tinnitus isn't from saws, it was caused by ear infection. I left the woods after an accident where a small tree had hung up in a big tree. I fell and unbeknownst to me, it snapped back hitting me in the chest, breaking two ribs, and the sudden impact caused me to squeeze the trigger on the saw which made it take off at full throttle and I lost control of it, then it hit my leg and tore my leg wide open to the sewing of over 150 stitches to put me back together.

Dangerous work tree cutting. My little sister is a tree surgeon. She's been doing it for 14 years now, which in that time, she's has had a couple of accidents, which were caused by the stupidity of others, and not her. In fact, it was other people being careless which made her go self employed.

Occasionally if she needs help, I'll come work with her. I can use the ropes and climb etc, but I don't have a chainsaw license so I only chop on the ground (which is still naughty, I know), guide her up the tree, use the chipper, drag brash etc. It's bloody hard work. You have to be hell of a fit to do that sort of work.

Bloody shit that you got tinnitus from an ear infection after all those years of using saws!