I'm so sorry to hear this, @eldudebro. While knowing that you are eligible for assisted dying might provide some solace in the back of your mind, it's still a difficult and heavy reality to face.
I'm no stranger to long-term suffering from chronic illness, compounded by the debilitating tinnitus I've been dealing with for the past six months. During my worst bouts of depression and suicidal thoughts, my dad helped pull me through by reminding me of something simple yet powerful: if there are even 15 minutes in a day when you can enjoy something—whether it's a movie, a series, music, exercise, or anything else—then it's worth holding on. He emphasized that death is the end of everything, both bad and good. It's also the end of you and any chance to change your circumstances for the better.
I believe many people who suffer deeply don't necessarily want to die; they just don't want to keep living in the ways they are currently. In my case, one of my other health challenges eventually improved with medication, which made me grateful I didn't end my life earlier. But now, 20 years later, I find myself in another dark place. I feel like I've been through enough and carried more than my share. I wouldn't mind if my plane crashed tomorrow.
Even so, I hold out hope—for you, for others, and for myself—that there are still things in life worth enjoying, things that can make it worthwhile to keep going. So please, keep fighting. You're not alone in this.
I'm no stranger to long-term suffering from chronic illness, compounded by the debilitating tinnitus I've been dealing with for the past six months. During my worst bouts of depression and suicidal thoughts, my dad helped pull me through by reminding me of something simple yet powerful: if there are even 15 minutes in a day when you can enjoy something—whether it's a movie, a series, music, exercise, or anything else—then it's worth holding on. He emphasized that death is the end of everything, both bad and good. It's also the end of you and any chance to change your circumstances for the better.
I believe many people who suffer deeply don't necessarily want to die; they just don't want to keep living in the ways they are currently. In my case, one of my other health challenges eventually improved with medication, which made me grateful I didn't end my life earlier. But now, 20 years later, I find myself in another dark place. I feel like I've been through enough and carried more than my share. I wouldn't mind if my plane crashed tomorrow.
Even so, I hold out hope—for you, for others, and for myself—that there are still things in life worth enjoying, things that can make it worthwhile to keep going. So please, keep fighting. You're not alone in this.
