ECP
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  • Based on my memory of that, I can relate to them, but they can no longer relate to me, now that T and H have fundamentally changed my life.
    At this point, I feel like I have nothing in common with healthy people, other than a memory of what it was like to be healthy.
    I'm tempted to be honest and say, "I have done nothing in the past 24 months except try to get well." But that would make them sad.
    MindOverMatter
    I think you should put away some of your thoughts @ECP , because it totally downplays yourself. You are not a burden. Good friends dont see obstacles as a burden.What about you choosing the venue? Seeing only the issues with things, and thinking the worst, is adding fuel to an already difficult situation. You are not your thoughts. And remember, its better to leave early than avoid it all.
    MindOverMatter
    I do not know your potentially other struggles, issues and PTSD. But you don't have to be defined by t and h, even though it is life challenging. I think you should share your story with your friend. It might be good for you. I speak openly to anyone about my journey with this, and it makes it easier for sure. But Im not defined by it.
    ECP
    Thank you @MindOverMatter. I will try to reframe things in my mind after a good night's sleep. I'm just especially depressed right now because it's the 24-month mark and some bad stuff happened last week that I wrote about in the suicide thread. :( Anyway, I appreciate your kindness very much.
    nothing to say. Like, they have no freaking idea how T and H will impact every aspect of your existence: hobbies, jobs, social life.
    I tell them about my incurable ear problems, and then when they say, "What else is going on?", I feel even worse because I have
    Does anyone else find it triggering to catch up with old friends who have yet to hear about your T or H? I feel like a Debbie Downer when
    Hi im new to this condition. Can i ask when you were servere. How did you cope with rain when bashing on the windows? I have vulux windows so its worse. Any tips?
    ECP
    I would wear earmuffs or earplugs when the sound of rainfall was painful.
    Hey did you go back on Cymbalta?
    Zigs
    It seems like it helped you before (last time around when you were severe) so could be worth a shot?
    ECP
    It helped only with depression. It didn't make the tinnitus more tolerable, and it didn't improve the ear pain. The ear pain was improved only by staying home as much as possible and by wearing ear protection when necessary.
    RunningMan
    I had missed this earlier and was wondering that myself. So Cymbalta didn't help with anxiety, either?
    Have you ever tried sound therapy did it help?
    Yellowblue44
    @ECP Can you please advise how you and your husband deal with this? So does he now go on holidays/restaurants/activities by himself or with friends?
    ECP
    I don't wear ear protection 24/7. I've slowly reintroduced sounds in the past 2 years. However, my husband vacuums our apartment only when I am at the supermarket, and he uses the coffee grinder only when I am upstairs with the door closed.
    ECP
    I don't go out with my husband as much as I used to. If I'm not feeling up to it, I stay home. It's not worth a setback. I will eat at a restaurant only if they aren't playing music and it's not crowded.
    @ECP hello. Your story gives me hope as i think we have similar things. You had very loud multi tonal reactive tinnitus and hyperacusis. Which i know you still do. But you said its better. Can i ask in your old posts you mentioned getting a mri scan. Did you ever get one?
    Yellowblue44
    Have you considered CT scan, thats meant to be quite?
    Can I also ask when you were at your worse, how did you keep going with this, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year?
    ECP
    I have not improved that much in 24 months. On a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 was the original severity, I feel like a 7. You're probably wasting your time asking me for so much advice. :(
    ECP
    Yes, I've had a CT scan.
    The only positive thing I have to say is that summer is over, which means there will be no more AC noise for another 8 or 9 months.
    kingsfan
    If you live in a climate with colder winters - no motorcycles for a few months
    ECP
    @2049v Fans and AC noises cause pain for me, and it sometimes makes my tinnitus louder afterward. I've spent all summer wearing earmuffs while running the AC at home.
    2049v
    @ECP, It must be a really tough situation. I also have severe tinnitus, balance problems, hyperacusis, and hearing damage. One morning I woke up and it was as if I had become disabled. I've been struggling for 4 months. Your situation is also very difficult. Were you able to work at all during this time? How has it been from the beginning?
    The same for my keyboard and sheet music collection. Keep= living in denial. Donate= defeat.
    If I donate my hairdryer to Goodwill, it means I'm a pessimist. If I keep my hairdryer, it means I'm delusional about my sound tolerance.
    Hi @ECP How are you now? Do you still have raective T? Can you eat out, go shopping?
    Yellowblue44
    Are you able to work now? Do you work from home?
    Yellowblue44
    What can you do now without ear plugs?
    ECP
    I can work from home, but just barely. Brain fog and pain and anxiety get in the way of being productive sometimes. I can go without earplugs at home, except when in the kitchen and when the garbage truck and landscapers are outside. I hate my life.
    They all claim to be as quiet as a whisper... but when it's over 100 degrees outside, you have to run it on full blast, and that's loud.
    Yellowblue44
    Do you still have musicial tinnitus? In your old post you have said your H was almost gone. So how long did that last?
    ECP
    I still have musical tinnitus sometimes. :( The longest I've ever been pain-free was about 2 weeks. :(
    Don't you wish the companies that make air conditioners would tell you how many decibels they are on the highest setting? Not just on "low"?
    crescentsky
    yeah total lies. i brought an ac that claims to be 50 db but is 90+ when running.
    @JeffToob His son Robert Cheeke is an awesome vegan bodybuilder, author, and activist. An all-around fantastic human being.
    @JeffToob Hey, since you went to OSU, I wonder if you ever heard of Professor Peter Cheeke from the animal sciences department?
    In an ideal world, our ears would generate their own noise-cancelling sound waves to fend off the incoming noises that aggravate us.
    beefling
    If only we were birds. Or crocodiles. Lucky bastards, able to regenerate ear hair cells. I'll take a tinnitus free life in exchange for higher reasoning. Being human is overrated anyway.
    crescentsky
    I'll gladly be a cat and live out my cat life.
    Right ear feels strangely "open" right now. With T, the overall effect is like hearing the wind whistle through an actual hole in my head.
    I'm back on the board after a long absence. Trying to catch up. So sad that 2 board members have passed away. RIP, Justin and Merlin.
    Hi there! Just thought I would pop in & say hello. How are you doing these days?
    ECP
    Hi! I was getting better for a while, and now I'm getting worse. I developed pulsatile tinnitus now on top of the existing T and H, so I'm seeing an audiologist on Monday. How are you?
    Hope you are doing better @ECP.
    ECP
    Thanks for checking in. My H was almost gone, but then I had some noise exposures that led to setbacks, so I'm almost right back where I started 19 months ago. :( I haven't been around in months, so I'm trying to get caught up on posts now. How are you doing these days?
    I greet you...I read your posts about suicidal thoughts and all that, and I understand you perfectly because I also have such dark thoughts...How are you feeling now? YOU took an antidepressant, did it help you, right?
    RunningMan
    @ECP I read it and responded there. I'm not doing too good because anxiety continues and added continued stomach pains during and after 8 weeks of SSRI's late last year that make me feel even worse and even worse anxiety. Will be getting upper GI exam in a few weeks.
    ECP
    @RunningMan Sorry to hear that. I hope your GI exam goes well. You deserve some relief.
    Yellowblue44
    @ECP you said your H was almost gone in an old post. What helped you was it the duloxtine? Wjy dis you wean off it?
    Hey, @ECP! I saw you said your hyperacusis got 90% better in the past 2 months! Gosh! What things are you able to do now? Have you gotten most of your life back?
    Hey @ECP , wanted to see if you started Cymbalta yet?? I am currently trying out a muscle relaxer (flexeril) , but if I don't have success with this, I need to make the big "med decision" as my depression is getting out of hand. My psychiatrist recommended Lamictal (anticonvulsant) however I am interested in discussing Cymbalta with him. Wanted to see who your doc recommended this.
    ErikaS
    @Mo8409 Ugh I'm so sorry. I do think given that your hearing was not affected, you absolutely have chance to heal from this. I've read the brain can just take a long time to heal when something goes awry like this, but it can. Like my taste and smell distortion from Covid in 2020. Took a good year and a half to 2 years to say I was 85% better. No real improvement until after the year mark.
    ErikaS
    @Mo8409 when do you find out about surgery at U of M?
    Mo8409
    @ErikaS This Friday. I won't be surprised if they want to just keep an eye on it. Typically surgery is only done if symptoms are severe. I'm not sure I'm serve enough. U of M will make the right call. My smell and taste are gone forever because I was working the ICU during COVID and caught it so many times. I'm glad you recovered.
    I dreamed I had a female stalker. I thought she said her name was Kim, but it was actually Tin. It was short for "tinnitus."
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