Suicidal

I would appreciate if you didn't try and make me say things I didn't, please. I said people that consider suicide as the only option should consider benzo and antidepressants. By the way, not all of them are ototoxic and even amongst the ototoxic ones, it will only affect a small amount of persons.

Did they, though ?
You think they did, I think they didn't. I don't think suicide is an option when you have tinnitus. When you can walk, swim, watch beautiful things, smell nice smells, run, make love, live in a developped country where you're not sleeping in the streets, take care of other people, I think we should all be grateful for that and cherish the life we have. Because you don't know what's next and there are still a lot of things you have to do in this world, only because so many people don't have the opportunity to do these things.

And yes, I watched the documentary provided by TT.

Can you explain how tinnitus makes it impossible to have children or travel please ? Do you have children ?
I know people on this forum that have loud Tinnitus and children. I have one child myself. I wear earplugs 90 % of the time when I'm around her. It's not a normal life, but it's a life.
Most Benzidiazepines, are not ototoxic, they however ALL disrupt your auditory cortex to some degree, which is arguably (a lot) worse, and while such symptoms aren't permanent they can last years.
 
You compared tinnitus to other conditions and imho, that is wrong. People here agreed with your posts. Some of them I recognize and like to read their posts. But, I still disagree.

Imho, the main issue with tinnitus is it's one of those conditions that no one can see or recognize. It's "invisible" to others and if it is severe, no one has an idea except the sufferer.

Sure, if it's mild and you only hear it "in a quiet room" then by all means try to assure someone they can cope with it. But, when it is severe, it is unique. Even cancer patients have treatments. I knew some of them. I think my tinnitus is worse than other conditions because I have no treatment that reduces the pitch and volume.

I want to work but it's too intrusive.

Yes, people are giving me advice. But, it is not realistic. I explained the problems with it but people here choose to ignore my explanations and reasons. Don't say I am not trying the advice when I have explained why and you ignore that.

I am up at night until 2 or even 5 in the morning most nights because it is so high pitched and loud. I can't imagine anyone else with it like this living for very long. Some people commit suicide because of tinnitus and it gets reported. Rarely, but it happens. I suspect it wasn't mild tinnitus.

Also, when you call people with tinnitus as having a mental illness as it makes them depressed, imho, that is also unique. Being depressed because of a breakup, for example, is different than when it's due to tinnitus. Tinnitus is a physical problem or caused by physical phenomena.
I am not saying severe tinnitus isn't bad or anything (I've had it, I should know), I just wanted to point out how there is no actual treatment (other than palliative) for mild tinnitus sufferers either, while mild tinnitus thankfully isn't anything to die about, it's still a constant annoyance.
 
Can a very strong blow to the head against the wall damage hearing cells?
It can indeed, especially if it stops the blood supply to the cochlear, in which case you may really want to look into a cochlear implant as it would alleviate your hearing loss and quite possibly lower your tinnitus.
 
See thays the difference. You're saying cant habituate. I promise you. You can. It might take YEARS but it will happen. I'm not saying you wont be bothered by it every single day for the rest of your life. But it wont bother you to the point of wanting to die. The first few months I cried in the shower daily. Loaded a gun and put it in my mouth. Swore I'd never be able to live like this. Promised myself if it didnt stop in 2 years I was going to kill myself. If I could tell myself back then that I would be "okay" I would have never believed it.
Don't make promises you can't keep.
 
I am so tired of people with mild tinnitus telling me it's early or it will get easier.
You have had t for a few months dude.. it still might go away. Mild? Its mild because I can live my life with it? Not really. I worked for years to accept it. And you are shitting on me because YOU cant deal with it. I'm proud of where I'm at because of where I started when my ears started ringing. I went from suicidal to stronger willed than I ever was before. The glass is half full dude. But go ahead and keep being miserable and see that getting you no where fast. You're an asshole so I'm going to be blunt with you, a cure is no where to be found. Wont happen soon. The sooner you "give up" trying 10 different home remedies a day and countless doctors visits leading no where the sooner you will accept it and live your life
 
I would much rather have my ears hurt 6 months out of the year and scream at me 24/7 than have my legs amputated. It could always be worse.
 
You have had t for a few months dude.. it still might go away. Mild? Its mild because I can live my life with it? Not really. I worked for years to accept it. And you are shitting on me because YOU cant deal with it. I'm proud of where I'm at because of where I started when my ears started ringing. I went from suicidal to stronger willed than I ever was before. The glass is half full dude. But go ahead and keep being miserable and see that getting you no where fast. You're an asshole so I'm going to be blunt with you, a cure is no where to be found. Wont happen soon. The sooner you "give up" trying 10 different home remedies a day and countless doctors visits leading no where the sooner you will accept it and live your life
I am "shitting on you" because your posts and replies to me are useless and annoying.

Go make promises and assurances to someone else. I don't give a damn if it's "only been ___ months." So what?!?

I couldn't sleep again. This metallic like numerous tones are loud and nothing helps. I'm just waiting until I finally try a suicide attempt.

Again, nothing helps. That is to everyone. Unless a) you can suggest how I can suicide - not allowed or b) can dramatically reduce or eliminate my tinnitus - impossible

Ear pain is difficult to deal with as well. But, the mystery of why the tinnitus worsened is very frustrating and being so helpless. Nothing helps and all I do is suffer every day. I can't help it if this negative. By definition, this condition, when it's severe and extremely intrusive, one is negative. I have nothing to be positive about and no meds help. No one helps and nothing helps. I just want to end the suffering.
 
I just want to end the suffering.
You made a big announcement 3 days ago saying you're going to commit suicide in 2 days.

You're still here posting the same old bullshit as you always do.

Why are you lying about committing suicide? Are you just one of those whiney arseholes who only shout about doing it but never does?
 
You made a big announcement 3 days ago saying you're going to commit suicide in 2 days.

You're still here posting the same old bullshit as you always do.

Why are you lying about committing suicide? Are you just one of those whiney arseholes who only shout about doing it but never does?
Attempting to die isn't easy. The intrusive tones makes it even more difficult. I am scared of messing up and being physically disabled or brain dead and still having this tinnitus. I have trouble concentrating. I'm mad that our euthanasia laws are so inhumane. Switzerland and Netherlands have more reasonable laws.

Anyway, I am not lying.
 
I'm going to be blunt with you, a cure is no where to be found. Wont happen soon. The sooner you "give up" trying 10 different home remedies a day and countless doctors visits leading no where the sooner you will accept it and live your life
No cure? Tell it to @BigNick (I seemed to respond to it very quickly and have definitely had some quieter periods. I have had some fluctuation but I'm feeling pretty hopeful after two weeks. - Did you experience such quiet time in the past? - Not that quiet no)
and
@Redknight (he said: My tinnitus is almost gone).

Not to mention the people participating in the experiments. These stories are already widely known in the forum. For example, Patricia



So, we have the first evacuation from this hell.
 
Attempting to die isn't easy. The intrusive tones makes it even more difficult. I am scared of messing up and being physically disabled or brain dead and still having this tinnitus. I have trouble concentrating. I'm mad that our euthanasia laws are so inhumane. Switzerland and Netherlands have more reasonable laws.

Anyway, I am not lying.
I believe you bud.

Hang tight. Therapies are being developed that will help us.

I was suicidal for the first year and change, my tinnitus is still awful and my hyperacusis is a total drag....but, I am getting mentally stronger and don't want to die now. I think we should hang on to see if the new treatments will help us... if they don't, then a planned, holistic exit from this existence is fine. It should not be rushed. Avoid fighting if you can, it will just make you feel worse.

See you around brother, really hoping you get a little relief ASAP.

Daniel
 
I would much rather have my ears hurt 6 months out of the year and scream at me 24/7 than have my legs amputated. It could always be worse.
Not so sure bud, I regularly swim with amputees from the Lao national team and often have thought I'd trade a limb to be free of hyperacusis and tinnitus, so that I could sleep, go anywhere without the fear of being damaged by sound, and not be tormented 24/7.

Today I was swimming with a guy who had no arms, that's really tough. I am friends now with these guys and have spoken to them about my brain and auditory injury. It is what it is and I am getting stronger at coping and have fully accepted my disability. There are people here and not on this forum, like Pete, who are driven to suicide by this condition and suffer pain 24 /7, everybody is different. Love and compassion go a long way. I think Pete deserves that regardless if it is trying on your patience.
 
I would much rather have my ears hurt 6 months out of the year and scream at me 24/7 than have my legs amputated. It could always be worse.
The sooner you "give up" trying 10 different home remedies a day and countless doctors visits leading no where the sooner you will accept it and live your life
It's great that you can still live a fulfilling life with tinnitus and have found a way to accept and cope with this condition. But there are people who are more debilitated than you are due to tinnitus and/or pain-hyperacusis. Accepting their conditions alone won't necessarily allow them to be able to cope like you are. There are people who can't work anymore, who are (mostly) homebound, who lost their friends, partner, and so on. Trying to live your life as normally as possible is, of course, ideal but not possible for everyone.

I hope people struggling will be able to reach a similar point but we shouldn't ignore that not everyone can do this. However, especially if tinnitus is new, you owe it to yourself to keep going to see if things could improve - and this might take time.
 
I am "shitting on you" because your posts and replies to me are useless and annoying.

Go make promises and assurances to someone else. I don't give a damn if it's "only been ___ months." So what?!?

I couldn't sleep again. This metallic like numerous tones are loud and nothing helps. I'm just waiting until I finally try a suicide attempt.

Again, nothing helps. That is to everyone. Unless a) you can suggest how I can suicide - not allowed or b) can dramatically reduce or eliminate my tinnitus - impossible

Ear pain is difficult to deal with as well. But, the mystery of why the tinnitus worsened is very frustrating and being so helpless. Nothing helps and all I do is suffer every day. I can't help it if this negative. By definition, this condition, when it's severe and extremely intrusive, one is negative. I have nothing to be positive about and no meds help. No one helps and nothing helps. I just want to end the suffering.
Mine got louder progressively and baselines after a little over a year. I'm clearly crazy from it, but I am happy again, and I never thought I would be and I honestly have no idea how. But if you don't kill yourself. It'll be "okay" at some point.
 
It's great that you can still live a fulfilling life with tinnitus and have found a way to accept and cope with this condition. But there are people who are more debilitated than you are due to tinnitus and/or pain-hyperacusis. Accepting their conditions alone won't necessarily allow them to be able to cope like you are. There are people who can't work anymore, who are (mostly) homebound, who lost their friends, partner, and so on. Trying to live your life as normally as possible is, of course, ideal but not possible for everyone.

I hope people struggling will be able to reach a similar point but we shouldn't ignore that not everyone can do this. However, especially if tinnitus is new, you owe it to yourself to keep going to see if things could improve - and this might take time.
I just dont agree with that way of thinking I feel like everyone is so much stronger than they think. You gotta find the beauty in the bullshit. Both of my parents are dead. I've lost my wife and mother of my children because of how I reacted to the ringing on the begining. I had to change careers. My ears hurt more than they don't. I have a constant high pitch ring slicing through my every thought every second of the day. I'm fuckin crazy but I'm happy and crazy and I know there are people who have it worse than me. But I still believe 1000% that we all can have some quality of life again. It'll never be the same but shit we only have one shot and then it's over. No matter what happens I wanna keep breathing. I hope everyone finds it in themselves to man the fuck up and cry when you need to. But just try to be happy. One day at a time, one hour at a time. Hopefully one day a cure will be found but don't let that be the end all be all.
 
I just dont agree with that way of thinking I feel like everyone is so much stronger than they think. You gotta find the beauty in the bullshit. Both of my parents are dead. I've lost my wife and mother of my children because of how I reacted to the ringing on the begining. I had to change careers. My ears hurt more than they don't. I have a constant high pitch ring slicing through my every thought every second of the day. I'm fuckin crazy but I'm happy and crazy and I know there are people who have it worse than me. But I still believe 1000% that we all can have some quality of life again. It'll never be the same but shit we only have one shot and then it's over. No matter what happens I wanna keep breathing. I hope everyone finds it in themselves to man the fuck up and cry when you need to. But just try to be happy. One day at a time, one hour at a time. Hopefully one day a cure will be found but don't let that be the end all be all.
Depends on how you define "some quality of life" but there will always be people who, for example, can't work due to tinnitus. That doesn't have to mean there's no quality to their lives anymore. Not sure you understand what I'm trying to say and I'm not sure I understand exactly what you mean. Tinnitus and hyperacusis can be debilitating and not everyone can live a normal life with those conditions. That's all. And there are people that are so debilitated that they don't feel like their life has much quality left.
 
Depends on how you define "some quality of life" but there will always be people who, for example, can't work due to tinnitus. That doesn't have to mean there's no quality to their lives anymore. Not sure you understand what I'm trying to say. Tinnitus and hyperacusis can be debilitating and not everyone can live a normal life with those conditions. That's all. And there are people that are so debilitated that they don't feel like their life has much quality left.
If its fucking with an individual that severely then I think they should be given enough money to live comfortably. Honestly though. Tinnitus made me switch jobs and I'm so happy I did. When I was suicidal I decided I really needed to do more things I enjoyed in my day than not or I wouldnt do anything at all besides sit in my dark house researching tinnitus for 1000000 hours. I started making money from creating. I read alot more. I'm more health conscious. Yeah I'm mentally tortured everyday but I feel like the more I suffer the better of a person I become... maybe this was the lesson I was supposed to learn this time around
 
I think lot of this debate centers around "quality vs quantity".

There are those, who want to survive at any cost, even if it means being effectively a vegetable and there are those, who want more from life than being able to breathe.
 
I just dont agree with that way of thinking I feel like everyone is so much stronger than they think. You gotta find the beauty in the bullshit. Both of my parents are dead. I've lost my wife and mother of my children because of how I reacted to the ringing on the begining. I had to change careers. My ears hurt more than they don't. I have a constant high pitch ring slicing through my every thought every second of the day. I'm fuckin crazy but I'm happy and crazy and I know there are people who have it worse than me. But I still believe 1000% that we all can have some quality of life again. It'll never be the same but shit we only have one shot and then it's over. No matter what happens I wanna keep breathing. I hope everyone finds it in themselves to man the fuck up and cry when you need to. But just try to be happy. One day at a time, one hour at a time. Hopefully one day a cure will be found but don't let that be the end all be all.
Does everyone have to share your life philosophy?.......No.

You have to respect that other's feel differently about pain/suffering.
 
I would much rather have my ears hurt 6 months out of the year and scream at me 24/7 than have my legs amputated. It could always be worse.
Not to sound overdramatic, but when I had severe tinnitus, I would rather have had both my legs amputated than severe tinnitus, at least after the amputation you still have the option of reeducation and prosthetics, with tinnitus, you don't have much options but to wait it out and hope it gets better (which you have no way to know for sure).

By severe tinnitus, I mean a level that's so debilitating that I could seldom focus, or read over a single sentence, let alone post in here, thankfully it "only" lasted for 23 days before dialing back to moderate.
Nowadays it goes from mild to moderate, I even had one afternoon of silence once! So yeah, it did get better for me, that doesn't guarantee it'll get better for everyone, at some point the amount of distress gets high enough that life becomes more about surviving than living, and then suicide becomes unsurprisingly quite the appealing prospect, while I am glad I did not end up taking my own life, I can understand people who harbour serious thoughts about it.
 
I think lot of this debate centers around "quality vs quantity".

There are those, who want to survive at any cost, even if it means being effectively a vegetable and there are those, who want more from life than being able to breathe.
Exactly. We all have different opinions of what we want to tolerate in/from this life.
 
If its fucking with an individual that severely then I think they should be given enough money to live comfortably. Honestly though. Tinnitus made me switch jobs and I'm so happy I did. When I was suicidal I decided I really needed to do more things I enjoyed in my day than not or I wouldnt do anything at all besides sit in my dark house researching tinnitus for 1000000 hours. I started making money from creating. I read alot more. I'm more health conscious. Yeah I'm mentally tortured everyday but I feel like the more I suffer the better of a person I become... maybe this was the lesson I was supposed to learn this time around
They "should" does not mean it actually happens, disability income from tinnitus is very much not a thing in most (if not all) parts of the world, whereas tinnitus can become debilitating enough that you indeed can't work or even leave your house.

Good luck avoiding traffic when you can't focus, and I am not even talking about people who also suffer from hyperacusis and reactive tinnitus, which are also a thing.
 
Attempting to die isn't easy. The intrusive tones makes it even more difficult. I am scared of messing up and being physically disabled or brain dead and still having this tinnitus. I have trouble concentrating. I'm mad that our euthanasia laws are so inhumane. Switzerland and Netherlands have more reasonable laws.

Anyway, I am not lying.
Err... Not to sound too obvious, but you technically can't hear anything (which would include your tinnitus) if you happen to be brain dead or in a vegetative state, you do need brain functions to interpret noise.
 
Not to sound overdramatic, but when I had severe tinnitus, I would rather have had both my legs amputated than severe tinnitus, at least after the amputation you still have the option of reeducation and prosthetics, with tinnitus, you don't have much options but to wait it out and hope it gets better (which you have no way to know)

This is how you can tell the true sufferers apart.
I often fantasize about someone offering me a great deal of trading both my legs for Tinnitus to stop.
I'm convinced that most true sufferers would hack them off themselves in exchange for silence.

When someone says stuff like: "at least I still have my legs", it tells me that this person has not yet reached the level of suffering and distress at which this would seem like a great bargain to them.

Yes life with no legs would take lot of adjustments, but there are may advantages over Tinnitus.
First, getting on disability should be a breeze.
The ability to sleep, relax and think are literally the foundations of our well being, as humans are not designed to function without those.
Legs are important too, but that importance is secondary to the above.

I would try to learn to walk again (maybe with prosthetic limbs)
If I was in pain, I could take pain meds and then I could enjoy little things in life, such as reading, relaxing, watching sunset, hanging out with friends, enjoying movies etc, without the screetching loud eeeeeeeeeeeeee destroying all of it.
 
If I was in pain, I could take pain meds
after the amputation you still have the option of reeducation and prosthetics
Just to mention, a good number of people with missing limbs experience "phantom pain" (another invisible illness). From my understanding, taking pain medication doesn't touch it, as it's "phantom". But it is apparently extraordinarily painful. Different kind of pain than tinnitus/hyperacusis, but from what I can gather, in many cases, just as difficult to deal with.
 

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