Juliane
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  • Actually, the fact that I did not look for a tinnitus forum before my worsening says it all: it wasn't that bad after all....
    Juliane
    @RunningMan Does that mean you first thought your low frequency tinnitus was an external sound?
    Cmspgran
    How are you getting on, just checking in you're ok as you haven't been on for a while.
    RunningMan
    Yes, I thought it was sounds outside my house, like distant traffic, car stereos, race track. It wasn't continuous. So, I think it went on for quite a few months before I even considered it was low frequency tinnitus in my left ear.
    If I could go back to the T I had prior to my worsening; I would consider myself cured. It is mad
    tpj
    So would I @Juliane. I'd give anything to have my mild, stable T back.
    RunningMan
    Same here. Take me back exactly 2 years, and I would be very happy, even though my tinnitus was already bothersome then. Take me back about 4 years, that's before my low frequency really became noticeable.
    Leine
    I feel the same. Miss my old T so much. I could live like that forever.
    I had stable tinnitus for 20 years and did not know it was a blessing :-( Please trust me; your stable T might suck but cherish it
    4alien2
    =(
    Juliane
    @BrOKeN_1 Yes I could mask it and it was a high pitch note /tone.
    RunningMan
    In a way, I could say my tinnitus was stable for over 20 years, but in reality, it was getting slowly worse over those years, heard it more often in quiet and over the fan as years passed. I just wasn't expecting the low frequency tinnitus 3+ years ago or the high frequency tinnitus to increase 2 years ago, and it's certainly more variable now, has cycles, different tones at different times.
    If any of you here have tinnitus that is always the same sound and does not change from sound - please cherish this blessing.
    sakrt
    ... including no increase by reactivity or volume!
    I have always been a fighter. But for the fight to have meaning there has to be a reward. With T there is no reward
    1/2 "People with tinnitus were found to be more reactive to stress". No shit Sherlock!
    crescentsky
    Having T is like having a problem x 2. A normal person can chop off their finger and worry about the pain and bleeding, but we would be worrying abt the pain, bleeding + FING T + T spike
    gameover
    Exactly. Fucking headache which was minor inconvenience is now a torture. I really prefer to think universe is a fucking choas, because if there is God he is fucking with us. I do not believe I deserved this.
    I need to find a solution in 2024. A permanent one. Living happily ever after is not happening. T is a death sentence
    This level of tinnitus is not compatible with life. I will stick around for my loved ones sake but VAD is becoming a real option.
    just1morething
    I know what you mean. My tinnitus is horrible today and I don't know how to shut it off. I just took a diazepam 10 mg but I doubt it will help. I think it's related to my neck and left TMJ but can't prove it.
    tpj
    It makes me both furious and incredibly sad that any of us should have to consider VAD. It feels like we've been left to drown.
    L along the way
    I also have the thought "just let it all end" many times... pffft... still hope it can heal.. to live with t is just not comfortable.. i hope & pray for sense of comfort & wellbeing
    I wish non-dangerous sleeping pills existed. Oh to fly away on a sky of GABA
    RunningMan
    Everything has risks, but some are safer than benzos. I take zolpidem (a Z drug) low dose overnight. Some people have luck with Hydroxyzine. There are DORAs but no generics could mean expensive, and they don't work well for everyone and can stop working or cause sleep paralysis or grogginess. Mirtazapine low dose for sleep - still risky.
    cyberspace
    Gaboxadol possibly
    Most diseases have beginnings and ends, ebbs and flow. Tinnitus is just nonstop torture! It is unbearable. Worst ailment that exists!
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Right?! Mine is ok today and I want to do some exercise but I don't feel like disturbing the loud but more tolerable moment I am having! I know it will end. We are damned if we do or don't.
    Becoming an accidental billionaire or tinnitus going away over night? What is most likely I wonder.... I know what I would choose
    gameover
    Yep. Make me richer than Musk or cure me from T/H (even T alone)? Of course the latter, I would not even hesitate for one fucking second. That's an incredible and sad lesson, I had no idea how "rich" I was until T/H hit.
    kingsfan
    @gameover Seeing that a millionaire already took his own life because of tinnitus just a couple years ago, money definitely isn't the answer.
    RunningMan
    A million dollars isn't really considered rich these days - barely enough to retire on. But some of these people were most certainly multi-millionionaires and couldn't live with it.
    I am not depressed. I am grieving. Big difference
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Docs are quick to prescribed anti-anxiety and depression meds for anything they can't answer or fix... if they don't know it must obviously be in one's head?!?!? When it doesn't work out you become a statistic for the supposed 1% who had a problem. Then they want nothing to do with you. I am a bit biased if you can't tell.
    RunningMan
    And suggest Lipoflavanoids. lol But, unfortunately, there's no tinnitus eliminator pill they can prescribe.
    If my tinnitus went away or lowered in volume, my depression would vanish in an instant. That is why I don't consider myself depressed
    kingsfan
    I just need a little bit lower volume and no more earplugs/worsening and I'd be just fine and dandy.

    The not worsening is a very important aspect. I need freedom from isolation back.
    Juliane
    @Cmspgran It is incredibly frustrating. I guess they cannot comprehend what constant noise does to a human being. :-(
    Juliane
    @kingsfan Totally!
    Stable tinnitus would be a dream come true. I used to dream about a house by the sea and having my own business permanently working from home. I guess priorities change:-(
    Favorite season T-wise? I'm not sure. Summer was difficult due to the lack of darkness. Winter is hard due to lack of light...Oh well...
    crescentsky
    I like the spring & summer weather but I hate the lawn mowing, landscaping that every house owner loves and dying to do the moment we hit like March 23 and they would each compete with each other on the loudest per week, per day.
    Tryn2BHopeful
    @crescentsky if anything I have learned I can do and could of done alot of things much quieter... with nothing more than being more aware of my actions.
    RunningMan
    I take evasive maneuvers if I'm out walking to keep my distance. Also will pop in earplugs sometimes. The two most common I have to deal with are barking dogs and lawn mowers. I typically know about the mower in advance. A dog can suddenly bark through a gap in the fence unexpectedly.
    New Years Eve especially was hell due to all the noise. Next year, if still around, I will go somewhere quiet
    kingsfan
    Definitely get out of the city during firework times. Surprisingly enough, Irvine, CA is very strict on fireworks and I never heard a single one despite the surrounding areas being practically a war zone.
    RunningMan
    I was still up at midnight, but it was quiet around here. I had the TV on and didn't hear any fireworks.
    L along the way
    With new years eve i was at a quiet place with people who weren't into fireworks either :)
    So glad the holiday season is over. It was hell getting through those days
    Tryn2BHopeful
    Was at my in-laws... tons of kids and loud people. Been doing this for years, it pains me that I didn't enjoy it because of this condition. Fortunately I didn't spike from it. My reactivity was through the roof the entire time though.
    Neighbors are having a party; playing loud Offspring hits (WTF) and screaming the lyrics. FFS 2024 I except better! I can't stand Offspring
    kingsfan
    @Juliane Oh, I was a big sneaker pimps fan.
    gameover
    Morcheeba, yes! Saw them live ages ago in 2002 (probably without ear plugs...) Massive Attack I discovered late.
    Juliane
    @kingsfan and @gameover Yeah, fellow Sneaker Pimps and Morcheeba fans :-) I was such a trip hopper... God, I miss those days. Being a young girl listening to dreamy music with mild T not knowing mild T is a blessing.
    4Grace how are you doing? I'm trying to hang in there. I actually had a glass of strawberry margarita in the bottle tonight. I actually drank it not long ago so I sure wish I can go to sleep and hope my tinnitus isn't louder tomorrow.
    Over one year since my worsening and my tinnitus has only gotten worse, not better. All the while being gaslighted by therapist and others
    sakrt
    To cope with the debilitating symptoms. Try candles and meditate, you're welcome. :(
    Juliane
    @sakrt Shocking and absurd! Even abusive. I am so sorry
    sakrt
    An agency who supposedly provides support to those with T/H, hearing loss etc. Next said to not know...and "closed file" without ability for discussion plus they work with audiology/ENTs too. Said to go ask GP for help to this (with even less understanding to these conditions). GP suggested to contact this same agency for the support. :..( @Juliane
    Does anyone feel like the cold and the winter make your tinnitus worse?
    SharonBell
    @sakrt I looked up about the weather affecting T last night and it was talking about the barometric drop in pressure and some other things I will try and post later.
    sakrt
    My brain is very much like a cloud. It's thundering atm and leaking rain (tears).
    SharonBell
    The winter affects mine. I was reading about the barometric pressure. When it gets warmer and then gets cooler I think that's when mine gets worse.
    Right before this nightmare started about one year ago I remember googling "feeling of impending doom" :-( How did I know what was coming?
    Every night I find myself thinking "this has to be a nightmare. It can't be real". But no, it is my life
    I had a huge emotional trauma over Christmas and now having a severe delayed spike. Cause and effect or just random? Who the H knows
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